


Asgardian Wedding Traditions

by moodymarshmallow



Category: Avengers Academy (Video Game), Marvel, The Avengers (Marvel) - All Media Types
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Fake/Pretend Relationship, Genderfluid Loki (Marvel), M/M, Mutual Pining, Slow Burn, Unresolved Sexual Tension, lady!loki makes an appearance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-05-09
Updated: 2019-07-15
Packaged: 2020-02-29 01:00:12
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 19
Words: 85,244
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18767965
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/moodymarshmallow/pseuds/moodymarshmallow
Summary: When Loki lies to his mother about being in a relationship in order to compete with Thor, things get out of hand very quickly.





	1. Prologue

Her name was Brunhilde, and she was the most beautiful kitten Loki had ever seen.

She was hairless, her skin mostly black but for her back paws and a pink patch on her chin. Over her face and the tops of her feet, she had the thinnest layer of fur that was like velvet to touch. One eye was cerulean blue while the other was jade. She looked at Loki through half-lidded eyes from where she lay on his chest, her little body rumbling with contentment as he stroked her back. She was beautiful, he loved her profoundly, and he had told a big, stupid lie to get her.  

* * *

 

Six months before the Bifrost opened to let a messenger with a kitten through, Loki had gotten wind of the fact that his mother knew that Thor was dating Janet Van Dyne. While he knew Janet had meant nothing by telling him about the congratulatory letter his mother had sent Thor, it had rekindled the old, familiar sense of being considered unworthy. He expected to feel worthless in the eyes of his father, but his _mother_?

Within twenty minutes he was in his dorm room, fountain pen in hand, drafting a letter to Frigga. It was one thing to have Thor show him up in tests of physical might and popularity--Loki knew his own strengths well enough--but to have his mother believe that he hadn’t been able to find someone in twice the time it had taken for Thor... No, that wouldn’t do.

At the end of what was a letter he’d already been planning on writing, he added,

_I spoke to my brother recently, and he mentioned he had shared with you the news of his relationship. I regret now not having told you about mine sooner. I’m dating a rather remarkable Midgardian, you see. It’s only that I just thought to amuse myself a little that I didn’t inform you of it before. However, it’s a bit more serious than that. I just had to be sure before I let you know; Midgardians being what they are I was uncertain as to how you would react. However, given your enthusiasm for my brother’s relationship, this seems a good enough time as any to let you know.”_

Leaning back in his chair, he tapped the pen to his lower lip. He was considering trying to get away with not naming said fictional datemate by claiming they wished to maintain their privacy, but his mother would have seen through that when he was 500, much less now. For this to be believable, he would have to make it seem like he was invested enough to have positive things to say about them, to want to share information about them.

He swung in his chair to look at the other half of the double--Natasha’s half. She was certainly out. While attractive and clever—clever in the way his mother would appreciate no less--she was the kind of person who would kill over a breach of privacy. Plus he had to room with her.

Swinging back to his desk, he opened a drawer to reveal the Academy yearbook issued earlier that year. He took it from the drawer and with his eyes closed he opened it to a random page. The smiling, All-American face of Steve Rogers looked back at him. Loki gave the book an appreciative nod. Not the worst choice it could have opened to. While not exactly his type Steve was handsome enough and strong enough to take his brother on in a hand-to-hand fight without always losing, but the sheer force of his boy-scout good-doer attitude made him off-putting enough that Loki turned the page without another thought. On the next page was Bucky Barnes, also attractive enough and very powerful, but he was sort of dating the guy on the prior page--along with Sam Wilson and Natasha. It would be difficult coming up with a lie good enough to negate the Captain America catpile, which he was sure had complained about offhandedly at least once.

Every page he turned, he ran into a similar problem. T’challa of Wakanda was royalty, which was by far more impressive than a clothing designer who could shrink to the size of a bug, but he was _King_ and as such outranked Loki. That wouldn’t do. Kamala? Far too young, and her friendship had a kind of earnest force behind it that he silently appreciated. Jessica Jones? Taken. Misty Knight? Also taken. He skipped over the clubs portion of the yearbook after glancing over the Defenders and remembering all of them were in relationships. While relationship status didn’t necessarily matter--he was lying about this, after all--the minute sliver of possibility that these letters were intercepted before they got to Asgard made it prudent not set himself up to be the target of a jealous, super-powered partner. Besides, all lies were easier when the least amount of details needed to be changed.

Loki sat back in his chair in frustration, glanced out the window across the quad to the obnoxiously large _Stark Industries_ logo that blocked his view of the city, and dropped the yearbook onto the ground. It had been there the whole time. He picked up his pen and again began to write.

_“His name is Anthony Stark, and he is remarkably clever for a Midgardian. He was a founding member of the Academy along with Janet and myself and heads a multinational technology corporation. What’s rather astonishing is that despite not having enhanced abilities like many of the students here, he has built himself a suit with which he can fly even in the vacuum of space. It is, of course, nothing compared to Asgardian technology, but his ingenuity is impressive.”_

Once he began, the words flowed easily from his pen without needing second thoughts. There were a hundred memories he could draw from, given how often he was around Tony. He read over his lines, brow furrowed in thought, before a snapshot memory of talking with Tony over coffee earlier that day struck him. He added,

_“He’s rather handsome, mother. A little on the short side, but he has a very nice smile and lovely dark eyelashes.”_

Proud of his talent for embellishment, he smiled as he wrote what he was sure would convince her if nothing before had,

_“I wanted to be certain he was invested before I told you, but as he has recently asked me to move in with him, I believe I now have that certainty._

_As ever, I send you all of my love and await your next letter with all the patience I can muster._

_- Loki of Asgard_

He folded the letter neatly and from another desk drawer produced a small wooden box, within which was a container of deep red sealing wax and a stamp. With just a small spell to melt the wax, the letter was sealed with an Asgardian L, around which a small snake curled. Now all that remained was to see if his mother believed him.

Only three days passed before he received his reply. His mother usually wrote him about every other week, so the speed of her reply gave him his answer even before he opened the letter to read,

_My Dearest Loki,_

_Words cannot express how much it warms my heart to hear you are doing well at the Academy.  There is nothing a mother wants more than to see her child happy, and it has pained me to see you in such misery for so long. I am beyond relieved to hear that you are building relationships with your peers, as so many of your letters shown me nothing but rage. Do not think I ask you to let go of justified anger, but it does me well to imagine a smile on your face._

_Now that you’ve let me in, I want to hear everything you have to say about him..."_

The kitten on Loki’s chest reached up and booped him on the nose with her paw, then yawned, showing a mouthful of perfect white needle teeth. Loki rubbed his thumb up her stately, velvety nose and sighed. The worst lies were those that started with a tiny untruth, a simple seed, and grew exponentially until they filled the room, blocking your escape.

After the first letter, Loki sent dozens in response to his mother’s questions. He saw Tony every day in class and on campus and talked to him regularly enough that the only thing he’d had to make up for the letters was Tony’s affection for him. It had been easy. He figured when he was allowed to return to Asgard, he would make up a lie about how they had agreed that their relationship wouldn’t last the distance, and nobody would be the wiser.

Then the kitten came.

It wasn’t just that cats were his mom’s favorite animals, that would have been significant, but not panic-inducing. The problem was that old Asgardian tradition decreed that all engaged couples were to receive a kitten so their household would have a cat.  

Despite how much this lie had gotten away from him, Loki hadn’t been foolish enough say anything about engagement. That would have taken some form of collusion to pull off, a photo at least, and everything was fine while his mom was the only one who knew about the relationship and he was the only one who knew it was fake.

But Brunhilde had come with a letter that read,

_My dearest Loki,_

_I trust this letter finds you well. I send you Brunhilde from my menagerie. She is unique among her five siblings, and upon seeing her, I thought of you immediately. I do not doubt that she will make a good addition to your household._

_I apologize for the brevity of this letter, but as I write, I am preparing for a trip to the Academy next week. I see no reason not to visit, given how frequently your father does so. I am looking so forward to seeing you again, as well as meeting Anthony._

_All my love,_

_Frigga of Asgard_

Reading the letter had set him into a panic that was only mollified when he laid down, and Brunhilde settled in on his chest. His first idea was to simply tell his mother they had broken up. Midgardian lives were so short, and Midgardians often so fickle, that ending a relationship within six months was hardly unheard of. Thor had had relationships nearly that short in Asgard. However, the most recent letter he’d written was glowing in praise for his “boyfriend,” and he knew his mother well enough to know she’d be suspicious. Furthermore, there would be no lie good enough to convince her she couldn’t meet him. With Stark Tower visible from everywhere on campus, it wasn’t as though she’d forget.

The obvious solution--the only solution, as far as Loki could see--was to convince Tony to play pretend for the brief period that his mother was on campus. It would be mildly inconvenient for everyone involved, but nothing insurmountable. He was certain her visit would be brief, and couldn’t imagine much would be required to convince her that they were in a relationship. A letter detailing the tragic end to their affair could come a few months after she left.

Loki sat up, supporting Brunhilde with one arm as he swung his legs off the side of the twin bed. If nothing else, she needed food and other essentials, so he couldn’t wallow in his misfortune forever. As soon as he was standing, she wormed out of his grasp to climb to his shoulder, where she pawed at the fur ruff on his jacket before settling over his shoulder. Loki opened the door to leave, but before he stepped through it, a thought occurred. He couldn’t risk having Tony say no, and he didn’t have anything to blackmail him with. With Brunhilde still on his shoulder, he backed into the room and opened the footlocker at the end of his bed. To the naked eye, there was nothing but clothing and letters, but he slid his fingers along the back, behind the clothing, until he heard the subtle click of a hidden latch. A small door swung open to reveal a golden hummingbird. He scooped the delicate form into his hand and stood, looking at it with a furrowed brow. There was a tightness in his chest at the sight of the bird, and he rubbed one thumb very carefully over its golden belly, the engraved feathers glistening in the light. With a heavy sigh, Loki slipped the bird into the inside pocket of his jacket before leaving the room with Brunhilde.


	2. Chapter 2

**Excerpt from a letter to Frigga**

... _Recently, a rather motley crew arrived on campus, bringing with them a talking raccoon and a member of some strange arboreal race. They brought with them some gadgets and weapons from galaxies most Midgardians never visit, but it took Anthony only hours to completely understand them. You know how I respect such cleverness..._

_...He is generous when even when it does nothing to benefit himself or his company. For example, there is a woman on campus who lost her arm in an explosion of some kind--prior to her admission to the Academy--and Anthony built her a prosthetic. Of course, with Anthony, nothing is ever so simple. She controls the limb just as easily as her other arm, with no loss of dexterity--something that is difficult to do, I gather--but he also built it in such a way that it enhances her strength and offers her other abilities. From what I understand, this must have cost millions of dollars, but he built it for her simply because he wanted to help. It’s almost silly how self-sacrificing he is, but it’s also rather endearing..._

* * *

 

Loki had visited Stark Tower so many times that J.A.R.V.I.S. barely registered his presence beyond opening the sliding glass doors and notifying Tony of his visitor. The ground floor of the tower was a glorified waiting room, with luxurious sofas and chairs on one side and display cases holding some of the most innovative examples of Stark Industries technology on the other. Loki passed it all without a glance on his way towards the elevator, though Brunhilde stretched up on her lanky front paws to survey her new surroundings. She balanced easily on Loki’s shoulders, barely wobbling as she craned her neck around to look at the myriad shiny chrome things lining the walls. Loki reached up to scratch her chin as she settled back into his fur ruff when they entered the elevator together.

The elevator doors opened to the cacophony of a blender crunching ice. Outside the elevator was a short hallway that led an immense, open kitchen, beyond which the dining room and well-appointed living room were visible. The only thing that looked like it didn’t belong in the immaculate, restaurant quality kitchen was Tony, in sweatpants and a tank top, mixing something sludgy and green in the blender.

“Hey Loki,” he said as he turned from the blender to rummage through a cupboard. He pulled out a glass, filled it halfway, then tilted it towards Loki. “Want some?”

“Absolutely not,” Loki replied, and though his voice reflected his disgust, he smiled at Tony’s unbrushed hair and the glow of his arc reactor through thin black cotton.

“Suit yourself.” Tony filled the rest of his glass, then turned to see Brunhilde on Loki’s shoulder. “Since when do you have a cat? I’m allergic to cats.”

“Are you allergic to Asgardian cats?” Loki asked, lifting one eyebrow.

“I didn’t know there was a difference.” Tony approached and held out a hand to Brunhilde, who stretched her long neck to sniff it. When she stopped sniffing, he stroked her velvety nose. “I guess I’ll find out in a few hours.” He took a step back from Loki and took a drink of his smoothie. “What are you doing here so early anyway?

Loki shrugged, but not enough to disturb Brunhilde, who was daintily licking a paw. “Perhaps I was in the neighborhood.”

“You live on campus. You’re always in the neighborhood.” Tony crinkled his nose. “I have a sneaking suspicion that you’re trying to get me in trouble again.”

Loki clapped a hand to his own chest, avoiding the hummingbird, in a theatrical display of offense. “I’m hurt that you would suggest such a thing, Anthony.”

“Now I’m convinced you’re trying to get me in trouble again.”

“I’m shocked and appalled that you would have so little faith in my good intentions.” On Loki’s shoulder, Brunhilde began to wash her face.

“Get to the point, Loki.” The tone of Tony’s voice had been friendly, even cheerful, but it had flattened as he leaned against the counter with his smoothie, his eyes narrowed in suspicion.

“Fine, fine.” Loki heaved a dramatic sigh as he reached up to gather Brunhilde from where she perched, moving her to his arms where he cradled her like an infant, stroking her belly. “My mother is coming to the Academy next week, and as she has been led to believe that I am much happier here than I actually am, I need to ask you a favor.”

“I feel like if I had paid more attention in Greek mythology, I would be running in the other direction,” Tony said.

“Ahh, so I’m actually a god when it allows you to make witty remarks?”

“I have things to do today that don’t involve listening to you talk in circles.” He set the glass on the counter next to him and crossed the kitchen to grab the pitcher still resting in the blender. “How am I supposed to make your mom think you’re happy?”

Loki closed his eyes, resting his hand on Brunhilde’s belly, where she bent herself in half to lick it. The very _worst_ lies were the ones that sounded stupid out loud. “By pretending to be my boyfriend,” Loki said flatly, cringing at the words as they came out, glad that Tony had his back turned to him at that very moment.

“Did you say--”

“Yes, you heard me correctly, and you know what I said. Let us not belabor the point,” Loki snapped. His pulse had sped and he tried to will it down again. Brunhilde nipped his finger, but he barely felt a thing, her tiny teeth no match for Asgardian skin. “I made a mistake,” he began through gritted teeth. “I told her I was dating someone because I was angry that she knew about my brother and Bug Woman. She wouldn’t have believed me without a name, so I...” Tony had turned now and was watch Loki speak while still holding the pitcher full of smoothie, his face a mask of perplexed disbelief. “So I used the name of a friend,” Loki said, unable to resist the urge to roll his eyes at himself, annoyed both at the hole he had dug for himself and the necessity of being so earnest. It spoke of a vulnerability that Loki loathed.

“Janet’s your friend too,” Tony said. It was Loki’s turn to look at him as though he had said the inexplicable. “However you feel about your brother, you could at least be happy that she’s happy.”

Loki stared at him blankly while Brunhilde wriggled her way out of his arms and dropped to the floor, landing gracefully and sniffing at his feet. “That has nothing to do with this.”

“I think it does,” Tony said, raising his brows. “You’re trying to drag me into something you started because Janet is dating Thor. ” His voice was firm as he set the pitcher down.

“You misunderstand me. I do not care one whit who my brother or Janet dates.” Angry embarrassment was boiling deep inside Loki, and he felt a flush rise on his neck and ears. “How does it look for me to have been here four times as long as Thor and not have a romantic partner when he’s a mindless oaf?” Now that he was angry, the words stumbled out.

“It doesn’t seem like you’ve been tryi--”

“Anthony. Please.” Loki clenched his teeth. The whisper of panic that had been crawling in the back of his mind was growing, throbbing in his temples like a migraine. “It is imperative that you assist me. My mother will be here in no less than a week and it is wretched enough to endure exile without having her know I’ve been lying to her.” He opened his eyes, then furrowed his brow as he realized Brunhilde had scampered off somewhere.

“You lie to everyone. It’s kind of your thing. God of Lies, right?” Tony asked and gestured to the dining room where Brunhilde was walking across the table, peering up at the light fixtures.

“God of _Mischief_ ,” Loki replied. “Would you have lied to your mother, Anthony?” Loki watched as Tony’s face briefly fell.

“So what, I’m supposed to help you get out of yet another hole you’ve dug for yourself?” There was something hard in Tony’s voice, and Loki regretted his last question. He had been angling for empathy, but it seemed as though he’d hit a different nerve. There was a thump from the dining room as Brunhilde jumped off of the table.

“You _are_ the self-sacrificing sort.”

“For worthy causes,” Tony said. Loki flinched at the word, but if Tony noticed, he made no indication. “And I have a lot to do. You do remember that I’m CEO of _Stark Industries_ , right? Between that and homework I barely have time to work on the suits.”

“This would require very little of your obviously precious time,” Loki said smoothly. “I introduce you, show her where we live, and within a few days time she’s back to Asgard and everything goes back to normal, just like that.”

“I’ve known you long enough to know when you’re trying to pull one over on me. You said ‘where _we_ live’. Did you tell her we lived together?” The only answer Tony got was a deep, impatient sigh. “I’ll take that as a yes. You can’t just move in.”

“You mean in fifteen floors you don’t have a single spare room?”

“That’s not the point,” Tony said, the tone of his voice somewhere between stern and frustrated. “How much--what--” he pinched the bridge of his nose. “Look. We’re friends, Loki, which is why I didn’t just laugh in your face, but this is ridiculous. This is way too big of a favor to ask.”

Loki clenched his teeth, unballed his fists, and reached into his inside jacket pocket. He produced the hummingbird and showed it to Tony. “This is the one piece of Asgardian technology I was able to smuggle out when I was exiled. Yours to study for as long as you like if you help me.” Tony’s brows shot up and he closed the distance between Loki and himself to look at it.

“What is it? It just looks like a statue,” he said, his eyes lit with a familiar sense of intense interest and curiosity as he fixed his gaze on the little bird. “I don’t see any moving parts. They’d have to be microscopic...” he paused, then raised his eyes to Loki’s again. “Okay, it’s pretty, but what is it?”

“Midgardians,” Loki murmured with a sigh and lifted his other hand over the bird. He made a gesture with his fingers, something that looked somewhere between American Sign Language and manipulating a holoscreen to Tony, and the bird shot into the air, its tiny wings buzzing. “It’s...a trinket...” he paused for a second and bit the corner of his lip, his gaze locked onto the bird. Other than the golden color, it looked identical to a real hummingbird, moving in the same jagged, irregular darts. “It’s a sort of spying device. It records information and relays it back, and is nearly undetectable in its surroundings.”

“How’s it undetectable? What kind of heat signature does it give off? What about cameras? And what if you’re not outside? You don’t see a lot of hummingbirds hanging around inside.” Tony said, but any real sense of argument was gone from his voice, replaced by wonder.

“Please.” Loki scoffed and in a swift movement, snatched the bird from the air. “It wouldn’t be very good for spying if it looked out of place. Follow me.” He walked into the dining room, not needing to turn to know Tony was directly behind him. Out of the corner of his eye, he saw Brunhilde dragging what looked like a long black piece of clothing from somewhere else on the floor, but he quickly turned his attention back to the bird. With Tony at his side, Loki placed the bird onto the table and held his pointer finger over it. It hovered an inch above the surface, unmoving. “Now comes the interesting part,” Loki said with a smile. He could always tell when things turned in his favor, and while his chest still felt tight when he looked at the bird, a warm certainty of his future success spread over him. He twisted his finger in two rapid circles, placed the tip of his finger onto its head, then pushed down.

When the very tip of its tail feathers touched the wooden surface of the dining table, it lost its shape. In milliseconds it melted into a puddle of swirling gold metal on Tony’s table.

“Holy shit!” Tony leaned over the table to look at it, immediately giving into instinct and reaching a hand to hover over it, bumping Loki’s out of the way in the process. “What the hell is it made of? It can’t be made of gold or else it wouldn’t be so cool still, and if it was made of something like mercury it wouldn’t have been solid. How is it possible that it was liquid and solid at the same temperature?”

“That’s for you to figure out, isn’t it? I don’t know how it works, I just know what it does. Which, if you’ll move your hand, is this.” Loki twirled his fingers in another rapid gesture and the metal began to rise off of the table, forming the shape of another animal. First small paws and a long tail, then the bulk of an almond shaped body, then the head, with whiskers framing a sniffing nose, and big mouse ears twitching in response to Tony’s gasp. The bird-now-mouse stood up on its back feet and sniffed the air.

From across the room came the sound of thudding cat feet as Brunhilde, still dragging what was now obviously a sock between her front legs, galloped up to the table. Dropping the sock, she leapt and made a beeline for the mouse, which squeaked in alarm and ran towards the nearest source of cover it could find--Loki’s sleeve. Loki scooped it up, made the sign for the mouse to return to stasis, and handed Tony the small golden statue of a mouse mid-run.

“I’ll give you one thing,” Tony said as he took the mouse, flipping it over in his hand as he examined it. “You really do know how to bribe someone.”

“I’m not bribing you, I’m offering you a gift for doing me an immense favor. It’s the least I could do.” Loki smirked, but on the inside, he was beaming. Nobody on campus was as easy to read as Tony, and Loki knew his answer before he even opened his mouth.

“Alright. Tell me what I need to do, then tell me how you made this thing go all T-1000.”

“Absolutely,” Loki said with a smooth smile. “Just as soon as you tell me what that means.”

 


	3. Chapter 3

**Excerpt from a letter to Frigga**

_...there is so much I miss about Asgard, but at least I am no longer stuck in those miserable dormitories. Living with Anthony...well it certainly doesn’t feel like home, but it’s not so bad. His apartment has some of the creature comforts I have missed--a kitchen, for one--do you remember how I used to follow you around as you cooked..._

_...he can be sarcastic, but as a function of wit rather than cruelty. We of course bicker sometimes, however, he’s easy enough to read that it’s obvious he means nothing by it. You know I would not be satisfied by someone with whom I could not match wits..._

* * *

It was only when Loki began to pack that he realized how little he actually he had. With his clothing folded in the footlocker and his books in a box, his possessions could all fit on his twin-sized mattress while still leaving him room to sit. It wasn’t that he didn’t have the money to support himself. Odin sent him a regular stipend that would have left him a pauper on Asgard, but on Midgard, made him one of the richest people on campus. It was more he had no room to spread out, both figuratively and literally. The twin bed was so short that he had to sleep with his knees bent to keep them from dangling off the end, and he couldn’t touch the far wall of the room and stretch his arms out fully without his hand being on Natasha’s side of the room. He had been in prison cells larger than this.

A rustling noise snapped Loki out of his thoughts and he turned to watch Brunhilde climb into the box of books. They were all borrowed from the Timeless Archives, so he had no qualms about letting her settle in on top of them with her clumsy kitten claws. It also solved the problem of how to carry both her and his things to Tony’s tower. He picked up the box while Brunhilde let out a meow that sounded vaguely like air being slowly let out of a balloon.

“Oh, that won’t do. Hopefully you grow into something more dignified,” Loki said and kissed her on the top of her fuzzy head. He set the box on the footlocker and effortlessly lifted the two, moving to leave through the open door when he saw Natasha in the hallway.

“So where are you going?” Natasha asked, one brow raised as he carried his possessions out of their shared dorm room.

“Aren’t you supposed to be peeping into Fury’s windows right now?” Loki asked dryly. She wasn’t blocking his way, but she fell in step beside him as soon as he tried to leave.

“Aren’t you supposed to be living in the Maverick dorm, where surveillance is tighter, so you don’t threaten the campus?”

Loki scoffed. “You don’t believe I’m a threat for a second.”

“Not in the same way Fury is,” she admitted. “But I do know that every single student even suspected of having a hint of anti-authoritarian attitude has been assigned to these dorms.”

“Is that why they moved half of your boyfriends here?” Loki asked. Just two weeks ago he’d watched Sam and Bucky carrying boxes down the hallway, followed quickly by the unmistakable sound of mournful electric guitar.

“So where are you going?”

“Deflect, deflect, deflect!” Loki said with a chuckle. “Is there trouble in muscle-bound paradise? Why else wouldn’t you answer?”

“You would know all about deflection, wouldn’t you?” The sliding glass doors on the front of the building opened as they approached. “You know I don’t actually need an answer from you. I can just follow you. It’s not like you’re going to outrun me with luggage and a cat. When did you get a cat anyway?”

“Today. Which is why I’m moving out,” he replied. “The room is barely big enough for you and I, much less everything Brunhilde needs.”

“Aww, I had wondered what her name was,” Natasha said, easily keeping pace with him as he walked and reaching out for Brunhilde where she sat in the box of books. Brunhilde hunkered down, her pupils growing huge, and when Natasha’s hand got close she smacked her with a paw. Natasha’s eyes widened in surprise, but when she pulled her hand away there were no claw marks as Brunhilde hadn’t used them.

“Who would have thought you had a soft spot for cats?”

“I could ask the same about you.”

“I happen to be very fond of animals,” Loki said. “You know, nosiness is a very unappealing quality.”

“Then it’s a good thing I’m not trying to make myself appealing to you. Where are you moving to and why?”

“Just because I lie most of the time doesn’t mean I lie all of the time,” Loki said as he adjusted his grip on the footlocker. It was light as a mote of dust to Loki, but Brunhilde had thrown herself against a side of the box and it had jostled dangerously to the side. He shifted so that the box slid to the back of the footlocker, against his chest. “I’m going somewhere larger, so Brunhilde doesn’t have to live in a cardboard box.”

“Did Fury authorize it?”

“If he had, you wouldn’t be following me around like a lost child.”

“I’ll find out one way or another. You know that.” Natasha studied him as they walked together, her mouth pressed into a thin frown.

“You’re wrong, you know.” Loki glanced at her sidelong, his lips curling into a smirk.

“Oh, I’ll find out,” she said firmly.

“I have no doubt. But that’s not what you’re wrong about. If I recall correctly, you said every student that even hinted at an anti-authoritarian mindset lived in the Maverick dorms.”

“Yes, and?” The frustration on her face was growing into anger as they neared Stark Tower.

“How very like you to snoop around in the dark so much that you don’t see what is directly in front of your eyes.” Loki spun and walked backwards, facing her. “What, then, would you call this bastion of capitalism and corporate name branding other than an effort to assert oneself as superior to the administration?”

Natasha stopped, her eyes darting from Loki’s face to the enormous _Stark Industries_ sign above his head. Anger turned to exasperation and she rolled her eyes.

“Do enjoy having the room to yourself. Though I would advise against inviting your paramours over for, what do Midgardians say these days? “Netflix and Chill”? Fury’s eye is everywhere but here,” Loki said, shifting the footlocker under one arm as he pointed to his left eye.

With a disgusted growl under her breath, Natasha turned her back on Loki just as the doors to Stark Tower opened the let him in.

* * *

“Well, I’m afraid I can’t get you one of everything.”

Loki and Brunhilde stood in front of a massive aisle of cat toys and accessories. Brunhilde squirmed in his arms, reaching out for a catnip bird she was too far away from to reach.

“Yes, I know you deserve it,” Loki said as he stroked her back. “But we’re already intruding and I feel as though it may put a bit of strain on Anthony’s goodwill if we arrive with one of those tall, carpeted monstrosities.”

A young woman wearing a shirt bearing the name Pet Paradise joined Loki in the aisle. “Hi! Are you finding everything you need?” She smiled at Brunhilde, who cocked her head to the side curiously.

“No actually.” Loki turned from the wall of toys to face her. “I haven’t been able to find a collar that isn’t made of some awful synthetic fabric.”

“Oh, uh.” The girl furrowed her brow. “We have some leather collars in the dog section; there are some for smaller dogs that will definitely fit her.”

“Really, just leather? Nothing embroidered? Nothing with gemstones?” Brunhilde reached a paw out at the sales associate and Loki took a step forward, allowing Brunhilde the room she needed to pat the associate on the arm with one paw.

“Do you mind if I pet her?” She reached out and carefully rubbed the side of Brunhilde’s face when he indicated he didn’t, cooing when she nuzzled her face into her hand. “Aww, what a sweetheart. Uh, unfortunately, we don’t really have anything like that. We have some really expensive hand-made leather ones we keep in the back, but if you want something sparkly all we have is rhinestone.” Her face scrunched up a little. “Sorry.”

“You’ve no need to apologize,” Loki said with a sigh. “I’m sure you’re not the one responsible for choosing what a store like this carries.” Relief washed over the girl’s face.

“As long as you don’t tell anyone I recommended a different store,” she began, lowering her voice a little, “you can totally order collars like that from like, Tiffany’s. They’re expensive as hel--heck though.”

“Really? That seems like something I ought to look into. In the meantime, I’d like to see one of those leather collars you were talking about...”   


* * *

 

Several hours and hundreds of dollars later, Loki returned to Stark Tower carrying half a dozen bags from Pet Paradise as well as several from a nearby grocery store. Brunhilde, worn out from shopping and wearing a soft leather collar with an engraved nameplate, was asleep in the fur ruff of his coat.

"Good afternoon, Loki,” said the voice of J.A.R.V.I.S., ringing out from hidden speakers as Loki crossed the threshold. “Your things have been taken to the third floor. Shall I show you to your room?”

“Really? He didn’t dump me on one of the guest floors?” Loki asked, addressing himself as much as the A.I., as the elevator doors opened.

“You wanted it to be believable, I made it believable. That is a lot of groceries,” Tony said from behind Loki. Loki turned to see him walking through the front doors with chemistry books in his arms. “I’ve kind of already got everything I need,” he continued with a frown.

“Brunhilde and I will not be existing on...whatever it is you drink in the morning, and leftover pizza.” Loki wrinkled his nose.

“Geez, lay off about the smoothie. What did kale ever do to hurt you?”

“You just answered your own question, I think,” Loki said dryly as they entered the elevator together.

“And there’s nothing wrong with New York pizza,” Tony continued.

“I’m not saying there is,” Loki said, his exasperated tone masking amusement at Tony’s insistence. “In fact I rather like Midgardian cuisine, but after two and a half years of cafeteria food and take-out I would like something homemade.”

“Huh. Add that to the list of things I’m just learning about you,” Tony said with the raise of one brow. “First I find out you love cats, and now you apparently cook. So what are we having for dinner, babe?” Tony grinned.

Something deep inside Loki froze and he tightened his grip on the bags until his knuckles turned white. “I would really rather you not...” he trailed off as the elevator opened, using the opportunity to try to walk away from the conversation. To his dismay, the source of the conversation followed him into the kitchen.

“You wanted it to be believable!” Tony’s earlier apprehension and suspicion had been replaced with a grinning, almost mocking sense of eagerness. “I’m going through a lot of trouble for you, remember? Maybe I ought to get a homemade meal out of it.”

“That depends. Are you fond of rabbit?” Loki asked as he placed the grocery bags on the counter, before leaving the kitchen briefly to set the bags of Brunhilde’s things in the living room. He pulled one of the plush beds out of the bag and deposited her, still sleeping, into the bed he placed on the couch.

“You’re joking, right?” Tony shouted from the kitchen. Loki rolled his eyes as he returned.

“It’s for her. Where do you keep your knives?”

“In the second drawer to your right. You’re _making_ her food? Can’t you just buy Fancy Feast or something?”

Taking a knife from the drawer, Loki slowly turned towards Tony, narrowing his eyes.

“I’ll take that as a no.” He wrinkled his nose. “Rabbit? Really?”

“She’d likely be hunting much larger things in Asgard, or eating off some warrior’s plate at the very least. At any rate, I also bought salmon and duck. It’s unreasonably difficult to find rabbit in this city, you know. I had to go to two stores.” He pulled several paper-wrapped packages from the bag and placed them on the counter. A dark thought crossed his mind as he looked at the twine. Now, because of him, Brunhilde was exiled too. Loki gritted his teeth.

“Oh, _two stores_ ,” Tony said, with an exaggerated roll of his eyes. “You never told me why you suddenly have a cat from Asgard.” He brushed past Loki as he picked up the other grocery bags to carry them to the fridge.

“I don’t see how that’s your business.” Loki used the kitchen knife to cut the twine on one package.

“Could you maybe, I don’t know, not be a jackass after I let you live here?” Tony asked from the fridge, where he had begun putting away Loki’s groceries. “Cause I didn’t have to go along with this.”

“I gave you something in return,” Loki said, making an effort to hide the strain in his voice. “Imagine what kind of suit you’ll be able to make once you reverse engineer that little gadget.”

“Yeah, and that’s super cool, but don’t be an ass.”

“She was a gift from my mother.” He unwrapped the package to reveal a whole salmon, which he placed on the cutting board and began to descale. “I left a lot of pets in Asgard, and I suspect she knew I missed having them,” he said, lying as smoothly as ever despite the frustrated embarrassment in his chest. The necessity of admitting anything about himself was grating, but lies were always easier to believe when buffeted by truths.

“You must be a very different person in Asgard.” Tony returned to his side at the counter, energy drink in hand. “Here the only thing you do with animals is call them names.”

“You know very well that garbage rodent isn’t an animal. He’d be the first to tell you that.”

Tony grinned. “You weren’t very fond of Devil Dinosaur either.”

“It tried to eat me,” Loki said, bristling. “Not that it would have succeeded but it was unpleasant.” It took him no time to descale the fish, and with that completed he began to fillet it with surgical precision. “Besides, I have respect for that telepathic canine astronaut who just arrived.”

“You’ve probably got a good point there. Hey, speaking of animals where’s your--” Tony stopped mid-sentence at the firm pressure of Brunhilde’s warm body against his ankle. He placed the energy drink on the counter and squatted down to meet her face to face. “Hey you. You’re in luck. I’m not allergic to Asgardian cats after all. See? No rash.” He showed her his palm, and she bumped her head into it with affectionate force. “Aww, you’re lucky you’re so cute,” he said in exaggerated babytalk, “because your dad’s kind of a jerk.”

Loki looked down at where Brunhilde was now nuzzling forcefully against Tony’s chin and smiled despite himself, turning his attention immediately back to the fish when Tony stood. Tony grabbed the energy drink and pulled the tab.

“Well if you need anything ask J.A.R.V.I.S.. I’ll be in the workshop.” Tony turned to leave with Brunhilde at his heels. “No no, not you. That’s not a place for kitties.”

“Anthony,” Loki said, after a moment’s deliberation. “There’s more than enough fish for Brunhilde and I, should you want some. It would be a waste not to cook it when it’s fresh.”

Tony raised a suspicious brow, as if waiting for the catch, but when Loki said nothing in return he grinned. “Alright, but I better not get stuck in the underworld for 6 months for eating something you make.”

Loki stared at him blankly, knife in hand.

“It’s the only myth I remember off the top of my head, okay?” Tony said, his cheeks coloring as a hint of embarrassment crept into his voice. “See if I try to make a reference again.”

“Hermes is the Greek trickster god, not Hades,” said a female voice from the elevator. Both Loki and Tony turned to see Janet Van Dyne, in striking yellow dress over black leggings with huge sunglasses sitting atop her head. “I’ve been looking for you,” she said, pointing at Loki.

Tony’s eyes widened. “HeyJangottagettoworkontheMarkIX,” he said in one breath as he pushed past her and ducked into the elevator door just as it began to close.

“If I’d known I would be roped into making dinner for the entire campus I would have bought more fish,” Loki said, giving Janet a falsely cheerful smile as she joined him in the kitchen.

“You’re lucky I don’t just zap you!” Janet said as she looked up at him, her face scrunched in exasperation.

“I’m sure I have no idea what you’re--” Loki began, then stopped as the expression on her face didn’t change. “Anthony told you.”

“Of course he did. He’s my best friend and best friends don’t lie to one another,” she said pointedly.

A greater panic seized Loki and he turned his attention back to the fish, separating the large filets from the cuts he was dicing into fine cubes to place in Brunhilde’s ceramic dish. “You didn’t tell my brother.”

“I absolutely did,” she said sharply.

The knife shook as Loki’s right hand tremored, and he set it carefully on the cutting board, trying to focus through the incoming tunnel vision of anger and fear.

“I just didn’t tell him it was fake.” When Loki looked from the cutting board, Jan’s face was still sour. “You’re too good of a friend for me to screw things up with your mom just because you’re being a jerk. At least I thought you were.”

A cool trickle of relief allowed Loki to unclench the fist at his side and mechanically scrape the salmon cubes into Brunhilde’s dish. “I think you’re making far too much out of this,” he said calmly, though his jaw was set. “This is a simple, temporary thing, and just so my mother does not believe I’m suffering overmuch in my exile when she visits.” He turned to Janet, holding Brunhilde’s dish in both hands. “I just don’t want her to worry,” he said, crafting the tone of his voice in such a way that he hoped would be believable.

“I’ve known you long enough to know when you’re lying to me,” Jan said as he briskly walked past her. “And normally I wouldn’t even care!”

Janet’s footsteps were light, but he could hear her following him as he entered the living room to find Brunhilde blinking wide, bleary eyes at the sound of their voices. As he approached, her little nose began twitching.

“I don’t know how we’re going to be able to stay friends if everything is always going to be a competition between you and your brother,” Janet said from behind him.

He placed the dish in front of Brunhilde, who stood up and stretched up on her toes before giving it a cursory sniff. Loki laughed dryly, waiting to make sure Brunhilde would eat before turning to Janet with a sardonic smile. “Then perhaps we’re not meant to be friends, because it became a competition over a _millennium_ ago when Odin decided who was more _worthy_ ,” he spat the word and walked past her.

In the living room with Brunhilde, Janet’s face fell. She turned to watch Brunhilde, whose little face was jammed into the middle of a pile of raw salmon. She sighed. “Loki, that’s not what I mean.” Shrinking in an instant, Janet flew into the kitchen where Loki was pushing pinbones out of the salmon filets. “I know you and your brother don’t get along--”

“Midgardians do so like to understate things.”

“--but I had really hoped you could be happy for me. Your friend.” She flitted down in front of his face when he kept his focus on the fish.

“I’m holding a knife as large as you are, you know.”

“Loki.”

Loki’s jaw twitched. “What do you want from me? Do you want this to be some happy moment where I come to my senses and stop despising my brother simply because someone else cares for him?” he asked through clenched teeth. “You are far, far too late for that. But tell me, Bug Woman, what have I done to undermine your happiness? I lied to my mother about _mine,_ but I have said nothing about your courtship with Thor and I could easily have done so the moment you began dating.” His face was hot with anger, a mask for the embarrassment this conversation was causing. Even at Janet’s diminished doll-like size, he could tell by her eyes she knew how he really felt. He walked away from her to wash his hands. The soft thump of her feet told him she had enlarged to her usual size even before he heard her voice.

“You’re not being entirely truthful,” she began.

“Oh really,” he replied dryly.

“However, I think I understand a little better now. Tony gave me the impression that you were jealous of Thor, but that’s not it.”

“Are you going to read my fortune next?” he asked as he dried his hands without turning to look at her. He froze when he felt her squeeze him around the waist from behind.

“No, but next time you want to convince your mom you’re happy, tell her about all the fun stuff we do together, you big idiot.” With that, she released him and zipped down to miniature again. “I’m still not entirely happy with you!” she stressed.

“Of course not.” Loki crouched, opening cupboards while trying to find where Tony’s pots and pans were stored. From the living room, Brunhilde’s dish clattered to the floor and the thud of a cat hopping off of a surface followed.

“It was still shitty of you to pretend Tony was your boyfriend without telling him,” she said, and Loki cringed, face still buried in cabinets despite not finding the skillet he was looking for. “But if he’s not mad at you, neither am I.”

The elevator doors opened and closed before Loki tried a different cupboard and stood, skillet in hand. A heavy pall of exhaustion hung over him as he flicked on the gas stove and placed the skillet on the burner. “Another mess Loki made for himself,” he murmured, not so much talking to himself in third person as much as repeating words from another’s mouth. He stared at the stainless steel on the stove with enough presence of mind to feel annoyed by the cookware’s gleaming, untouched appearance, but not enough to oil the pan, season the fish, and put it too on the stove. Then Brunhilde wound snakelike around his legs, meowing her kitten squeak of a meow, standing up on her hind legs to paw at his calf when he looked down at her.

“Yes,” he said absently and scooped her up. “What was I thinking? That wasn’t nearly enough for a growing girl.” He leaned to kiss her on the top of her head, but she grabbed his face between her paws and began to lick his chin. Loki laughed as he carried her into the living room to grab her bowl, and Brunhilde purred so hard that her warm body vibrated in his arms.


	4. Chapter 4

###  **Excerpt from a letter to Frigga**

_Today was Janet’s birthday, and Anthony surprised her with a designer handbag she had once commented on wishing she could afford. It had come up originally in passing conversation, and as far as I recall, she never mentioned it again. While Anthony can be careless, his attention to detail when it comes to his friends is peerless..._

* * *

 

Loki was rarely fooled by dreams. For someone who could walk through the boundaries of realms, the hazy barriers between wakefulness and dreaming were all too familiar. But he couldn’t always tell, and he couldn’t always control them, but the fact that he sometimes could made nightmares all the more irritating. Time and time again he would find himself in a dungeon, or surrounded by frost giants, or watching lightning streak across the sky, screaming at the threats in impotent rage because only he could realize it was just a dream.

Those were the easy ones.

It was the dreams of warmth, of the view of Asgard from his bedroom window, of following his mother around in the kitchen--those were the ones from which he woke up wounded. In this dream someone whose face he couldn’t see was holding his hand, pulling him along through a crowd of bewildered Asgardians, and together they were laughing in exhilaration. He was barefoot, and the ground under his feet changed from concrete to sand as he began to run to keep up with the person in front of him. His heart was pounding and the hand in his was so familiar. When the sand met the surf and the first lap of cool water touched his feet, he woke.

When he felt himself come to consciousness he refused to open his eyes. Once again he resisted the urge to mentally number the days, a habit picked up from years of periodic imprisonment. It would only serve to feed the growing beast made of anger and despair that was born when he was exiled. With his eyes closed, he stretched out and realized his legs didn’t dangle off the end of the bed. He opened them to see not a drop ceiling made from white tiles, but a solid one with recessed LED lighting.

In truth, he shouldn’t have been surprised that Tony had given him this room; he’d slept in it once before. Early in the Academy’s inception, before many students had joined, Tony had invited him over for movie night with Janet. When it had run long, Tony had offered them both the opportunity to stay the night instead of walking to the dorms through the half-built Academy at two in the morning. When he had slept here then, the room looked like it had been plucked from the showroom of a high-end furniture store, impersonal but expensively stylish. Now though...

Walking into the room last night with Brunhilde had shocked him so much that he’d immediately sat down on the bed. The nondescript modernist paintings had been replaced with classical scenes of Viking ships and landscapes. One had immense wolves looming in the background, and Loki stared wide-eyed and knowing at the images of Fenrir and Sköll. The frames were dark wood, engraved with a braided rope design. That design was reflected in the comforter, which was a deep green with gold accents. Loki had set Brunhilde on the bed beside him and raked both hands through his hair, holding his head with his elbows on his knees. There was a dresser where there hadn’t been one before, the same shade and accents as the frames, atop of which was a small plant with blue-black flowers and three bottles of black nail polish. But the most stunning thing was hanging on a coat rack next to the dresser--a fluffy gold robe with an L monogrammed on the chest.

Loki’s mind spun, rapid and fuzzy, trying to put together how Tony had managed this in such a short time and why. There was no necessity for the extravagant effort that it must have taken to redo this room in the time between Tony agreeing and Loki returning with Brunhilde’s things. Something akin to panic was pounding in his chest as he mechanically set out Brunhilde’s beds, both of which were fluffy and extravagant, one a nearly complete sphere with a small entrance hole. As she tried to climb into it he grabbed her, holding her against his shoulder and pressing his face into her warm little body, listening to her rapid heartbeat, unable to stop an unbidden wave of befuddled affection. Brunhilde initially squirmed but rested against his shoulder as he stroked her back. He closed his eyes as the same tightness in his chest as when he touched the hummingbird gripped and held him just as tightly as he held Brunhilde.

Eventually, she had grown tired of laying on his shoulder and had expressed her displeasure in a series of angry, high-pitched meows. When he let her free, she dove into the closed-off bed, peeking out of the hole at him as if preparing in case he tried to pick her up again.

Loki had given up on trying to put away his things and instead had emptied Brunhilde’s bags, setting up her litter pan and water fountain. He offered a little catnip bird to her by dangling it in front of her hidey-hole until she thrust out a paw to grab it with her claws. From inside the bed came the sound of rustling and purring, and Loki sat on his heels to watch it shake as she played.

Sleep had been the only answer for racing thoughts and questions and thankfully the day had been tiring enough that it came quickly.

Loki stared at the ceiling, troubled. He had slept far better than he ever had in the Maverick dorms. Stark Tower was quieter, for one. All he had heard before falling asleep was the soft white noise of the air conditioning and occasional rustling from Brunhilde’s corner. Then there was the bed. Still on his back and in his clothes, he stretched out his arms and legs as much as he could, flattening himself out into a starfish position, and none of his limbs even touched the edges. With a groan he rolled onto his stomach, folding his arms under his head to rest his forehead on his forearms. As soon as he turned, he felt the slight weight of Brunhilde as she jumped onto his back and walked up his spine. She placed a paw on the back of his head before he felt a sharp tug on his hair.

“You stop that right now,” he murmured without force, still trying to collect his thoughts which were muddled with the fleeting sensations of that dream of running, laughing, and sand beneath his feet.

Brunhilde tugged again, and he dumped her off by sitting up and swinging his legs over the side of the bed. “That behavior is unbecoming of a daughter,” he said quietly. “It was hard enough trying to train Fenrir not to bite, you had better be a little more civilized.”

For a moment Brunhilde looked up at him with her wide, knowing eyes, offering a glimpse of the preternatural intelligence he expected from an Asgardian cat. The illusion was shattered as she rolled onto her back, tail between her legs, batting at it until she managed to grab the tip of her tail and lick it.

“Well, my mother was right. You are certainly unique.” He stood and reached to pet her, pulling his hand back as she reached for it with an open mouth. Shedding his jacket and tossing it on top of her, he crouched in front of the footlocker, which had been placed at the foot of his bed. A couple of history books reminded him that he was supposed to attend class that day, and with a frown, he pushed the box of books under the bed. He sighed at the clothing folded in the footlocker, reaching for a pair of dark jeans when a knock on his closed door made him start. Combing his hair with his fingers he straightened himself out and opened the door.

“Hey, I didn’t wake you up, did I?” Tony was disheveled, still wearing the clothes Loki had last seen him in, with a look to him that suggested that despite his energy, he had gotten very little sleep. “You sort of disappeared after Janet left so I wasn’t sure if you were actually here.” The scent of coffee drifted from the mug in his hand and Loki’s stomach grumbled.

“That’s not true,” Loki said as he eyed him. “By the looks of it, you spent the entire night in the workshop, so if anyone disappeared, it wasn’t me.”

“Totally untrue.” Tony made a vague gesture towards the kitchen with his mug. “I had the fish you left for me. If I had any idea what a good cook you were I would have let you know that you could use the kitchen anytime.”

Loki felt a flush rising on his cheeks and spun back into the room, leaving Tony at the door, pretending to be in the middle of picking out clothing. “Well, it’s always gratifying when one’s skills are acknowledged,” he said, staring at the jeans as he pulled them out. “I suppose we’re even when it comes to the inconvenience then?”

From the door, Tony scoffed. “I haven’t even met your mom yet. What should I call her, by the way?”

“I would start with ‘Your Majesty’.” Loki tossed the jeans onto the bed, next to his coat. From under the collar, a black paw shot out and batted at them. “Defer to her from there.”

“Gotcha.” Tony hovered in the doorway and took a sip of his coffee. Loki felt the weight of his gaze on his back. “Oh! By the way!” Tony said, with the tone of someone who had just remembered something important. “What do you think of the room? This is the best I could do on short notice, but I think it worked out. I thought about getting a new frame for the bed, but couldn’t find one anyone would deliver same-day. But I think before your mom gets here you get a new frame or at least a headboard.” Tony was joining him in the room now, walking up to the dresser to run his hand over the antique wood.

Loki furrowed his brows as he watched Brunhilde drag his jeans under the tent she had made of his coat. There was the impulse to answer him snidely if only to cover how stunned he was that someone had gone through such extraordinary effort to make him feel at home. Though his eyes were on Brunhilde, he could feel the weight of Tony’s gaze on his back.

He turned to glance at Tony’s expectant face. “It’s... believable enough. Certainly preferable to that dorm room. I’m thankful there are no paintings of my brother or father in here, that’s for certain.” Loki gestured to the painting of the wolves. “Do you know what this one is of?”

“I just asked J.A.R.V.I.S. to look for Viking paintings,” Tony admitted sheepishly.

Loki pressed one finger to the smaller of the wolves. “This is Sköll. When Ragnarök comes, he will swallow the sun and Asgard will plunge into an everlasting winter.” He shifted his finger to the largest. “And this, this is Fenrir, who will kill the All-father. So it is foretold, at least.”

“Well, that’s dark.” Tony frowned. “I can just send it back if--”

“Absolutely not!” Loki chuckled as he gazed at the painting. “What a wonderful thing to wake up to every morning,” he said wistfully.

“Good to know I did the right thing?” Tony sounded puzzled. “Hey, when you’re dressed, would you mind coming to the workshop? I have a couple of questions to ask you about that mousebird.”

A smile played slowly over Loki’s lips. “Give and take, Anthony.” He looked over his shoulder. “Is there more coffee?”

Tony grinned. “No, but I can make some.”

* * *

 

The entire fifth floor of the tower was dedicated to the workspace Tony needed to develop, build, and test the Iron Man suits. One wall was lined with old designs he no longer used, some damaged to the point that Loki regarded them with a sort of respectful disbelief that Tony had emerged from them alive.

As Loki followed Tony into the workshop, a robot arm with a simple clamp perked up at the sound of the sliding doors, lifting on its hydraulic hinge. Without looking at it, Tony extended one fist as he walked, dropping his arm when the robot tapped his fist with its clamp. The arm turned then to Loki, expectantly.

“Ah. No thank you,” he said as he passed it.

“Hey, be nice to DUM-E,” Tony said, mock hurt in his voice. “He doesn’t get out much.”

“What was it that you needed me for again?” Loki asked as he reluctantly held up the hand not holding coffee for DUM-E to touch. DUM-E’s gears whirred as the arm extended and very carefully tapped Loki on the hand.

“For starters, I think we need to talk about how I’m supposed to pull this off,” Tony said as he stopped at a metal table that was long enough for Loki to lay on. “Secondly, you didn’t show me how to turn this damn thing on.”

In the center of the table, surrounded by a host of electronics Loki didn’t recognize, the golden mouse sat, still frozen in the same position Loki had left it in when he handed it over.

“I’m not picking up anything from this other than I know it’s giving off some kind of electromagnetic field.” Tony perched on a stool in front of the table and motioned for Loki to do the same. With a flick, he opened a holographic screen to show a wireframe model of the mouse surrounded by numbers that meant very little to Loki, and a graph measuring the electromagnetic energy field surrounding it. “I hope you appreciate how frustrating it is to try to reverse engineer something without an ‘on’ switch.”

“If it pained you, Anthony, then I appreciate it,” Loki said with a smile as he sat with him, placing his mug on the far edge of the table.

Tony scoffed and gestured to the mouse. “Just turn it on.”

“Bossy.” Loki reached out and held his hand over the mouse, feeling the invisible threads of magic powering it. “You do this to turn it on and off,” he said, demonstrating the intricate movement necessary to manipulate the device. The mouse sprang to life, lifting to its hind legs and sniffing the air. Every sensor Tony had placed around it immediately lit up, and thousands of numbers scrolled past on the screen.

“Why couldn’t it have a _visible_ ‘on’ switch?” Tony muttered and leaned in to look closer. “You say you don’t know anything about how it works?”

“I didn’t say that.” Loki sipped his coffee. “I know the how not the why.” He watched Tony study the mouse, which had begun skittering around the table, sniffing at the various things surrounding it.

“So you control it through this electromagnetic field,” Tony said under his breath, obviously talking to himself. “That’s insane. Electromagnetism doesn’t work like that.” But after a couple of clumsy attempts, Tony completed the gesture to turn off the mouse.

“And the last time I was on Midgard, you didn’t have these,” Loki said and reached around Tony’s head to flick the holographic screen around.

“If you had visited between Ye Olde Viking Times and now maybe you’d be a little less surprised by our technological advancement,” Tony said with a snide glare, swiping the screen back from Loki.

“Oh, I don’t know. Midgard is still full of unwashed peasants,” said Loki snidely, lifted his nose in the air. “Most of whom don’t even believe in magic anymore. Perhaps your sensors are picking up the fact that this is a magical device and simply doesn’t have the language with which to interpret it.”

“Excuse you,” Tony said with a glare as he picked up a small instrument that looked as though he’d stolen it from a dentist’s office.

“Present company excluded,” Loki amended with a heavy sigh.

“Anyway, I don’t think magic is really a thing.” Tony prodded at the mouse, which skittered to one side when the point of the instrument touched its side. “My best guess so far is that there’s some kind of quantum physics principle at play when light interacts with the object’s personal electromagnetic field. Once it’s turned on, it’s just a highly specialized learning machine, which is why when I do this...” Tony tried again to poke the mouse but it dashed out of the way before the instrument touched it. “...it knows that this is a solid object that can make physical contact with it and knows to avoid it.” Tony sat back and rubbed the bridge of his nose. “That’s all theoretical, but I know there’s a scientific explanation.”

“If magic isn’t a thing, what is it I do, hmm? Parlor tricks?” Loki’s voice was on edge. “I did not study sorcery for hundreds of years to listen to people discredit my skills.”

Tony rolled his eyes. “Whatever you do, I’m sure there’s an explanation somewhere. Fifty years ago we couldn’t even envision fusion reactors, and now I’ve got one in my chest.” Tony caught the mouse as it tried to run off of the table. “I’ve seen what you can do firsthand. I don’t doubt it. I just think that there’s something at play we don’t understand yet.” He swiveled in his stool, his knees brushing Loki’s thigh as he turned to face him. “Everything in this universe operates under certain rules--we just haven’t figured them all out yet.”

“If you hadn’t just stated that my mastery of the magical arts wasn’t ‘a thing’, your enthusiasm would be charming,” Loki said as he took the mouse from his hand and placed it back on the table, twisting his fingers to place it into stasis again. “Was that all you required of me?”

“Well, no.” Tony leaned forward against the table, resting his chin in his hands as he studied the immobile mouse. “What am I supposed to tell your mom about us?” When Loki only stared at him blankly, he continued. “We need to get our stories straight if I’m going to convince your mom.”

“Ah.” A warm, embarrassed flush crept up Loki’s neck and ears. “Well.”

“Not exactly something you considered, huh?” Tony asked with more than a hint of sarcasm.

“I think we’ve established that this misadventure was due to a lack of forethought on my part,” Loki said with a sigh, picking up his coffee mug, then frowning when he found it empty. “But I’ve already made a fool of myself, so what do you want me to tell you?”

“How’d we meet? How often do we go out on dates? Where do we go? Are we having sex or...?”

“My mother is not going to ask about my sex life!” Loki’s voice rose in alarm as the flush on his neck and ears spread to his cheeks. His words almost echoed in the quiet of the immense workshop, and it was all Loki could do to resist the urge to rend open a door between realms and disappear. Instead he feigned interest in his empty coffee cup to avoid Tony’s bemused smile.

“All I meant was I need to know how close you said we are so I can fake it.” Tony hopped off of his stool and crossed the room behind Loki, returning with the half-empty carafe of coffee, which he set behind the stationary mouse.

Loki took a moment to refill his mug and steady himself. He remembered perfectly what he had written to his mother, but the content of those letters was unbearably embarrassing under the circumstance. If the alternative hadn’t been admitting he lied to his mother, he would have already called the plan a failure to avoid the necessity of talking about it.

“Firstly, you invited me to move in after six months of dating,” he said and sipped his coffee, playing cool but doing it so poorly that he couldn’t look at Tony as he spoke.

“That’s pretty quick,” Tony said. “Normally, I’d be worried if a girl wanted to move in that soon after we started dating.”

“I don’t waste my time studying Midgardian courtship habits,” he mumbled.

Tony rolled his eyes. “Obviously, or else you’d know we don’t call it ‘courtship’ anymore.”

“Look,” Loki said with a sigh. He placed his mug on the table and turned to Tony, his fingers tented. “I didn’t make up any grand gestures or give specific accounts of fictional dates. I simply told her of things that actually happened and gave them a romantic spin.”

Tony sighed with a shake of his head. “Aright, but if I contradict you on something just remember that you brought it on yourself.”

“As always,” he replied with a sneer, no longer able to maintain civility under the weight of his frustrated embarrassment. “If you’ll excuse me, I am still somehow required to take classes despite having already had centuries of superior education.”

“Aren’t you going to show me how to make this thing change into a bird?” Tony asked, swiveling all the way around in his stool to watch Loki slinking towards the door.  “All I can do right now is turn it on and off; I can’t get accurate readings on it without being able to access all the settings.”

At the sliding glass doors Loki turned to glance at him sidelong. “I’ll be here a week,” he said. “Surely you can wait until I fulfill other obligations.”

“I don’t believe for a second that you’re eager to get to class,” Tony said, a weariness evident in the circles under his eyes and the furrow of his brows.

“Then it’s fortunate that I don’t require you to clap your hands and believe in my existence, is it not?” A smile crept slow over Loki’s lips as he offered Tony a jaunty wave before backing out of the door.


	5. Chapter 5

If Tony believed that inanimate objects had feelings, by now he would have suspected that the Mark IX was getting jealous. He had spent the last four nights in his workshop with Loki’s mousebird which meant that work on the Mark IX’s flight stabilization subroutines had ceased. He would get back to it; he never scrapped a project, after all, but right now the Asgardian mousebird was the most interesting piece of tech in the whole tower.  

The only problem was that he still had no idea how it worked. 

Outside of the revelation that it was controlled through manipulation of an electromagnetic field, the little device was an enigma. When activated, it behaved just like the animal it was supposed to be, and if there were preset patterns in its programming, he couldn’t identify them. As a mouse, it even reacted to food, a fact which he had discovered after eating a bagel that shed some sesame seeds onto his work table. The mouse, which was running an obstacle course of spare parts he’d set up for it, dashed towards the seeds and snatched two of them up in its mouth before he could turn it off. Once it was immobile again, the seeds dropped back onto the table. Given that it couldn’t actually eat the seed, that behavior was unnecessary. To Tony, it seemed as though whoever created it had thrown out any concepts of simplicity and efficiency in favor of planning for every potential situation, no matter how unlikely. It was an attention to detail completely at odds with the device’s primary flaw: Loki had called it a spying device, but nobody was going to mistake a golden, shiny mouse for a real animal. 

That was the trouble with Asgardian things in general--they were flashy, complex, and inexplicable. There should have been nothing stopping Hulk from lifting Mjolnir, for example, yet no one but Thor could make it budge. Similarly, Loki shouldn’t be able to disappear in plain sight, or make something appear with a wave of his hand like a street magician, yet he’d watch him do it dozens of times. 

There was nothing Tony hated more than not being able to figure something out. 

It was the slight pressure on his chest that woke him, but it was the tug on his eyelashes that jolted him fully into consciousness. When Tony opened his eyes, the first thing he saw was Brunhilde’s wide-eyed face, mouth open and teeth bared as she drew close to his eye. As swiftly as he could manage for a man startled from sleep only seconds before, he grabbed Brunhilde around her waist and held her at arm's length as he stood up. 

Brunhilde offered him a look of bewildered innocence, as if she hadn’t been trying to yank out his eyelashes only seconds earlier. 

“See, this is why I don’t have pets,” Tony said and set her down on the floor next to his bed. “Robots and AI don’t try to bite my face.” He rubbed sleep from his eyes with the heels of his hands as he stood, mechanically following his morning routine despite the extra challenge of trying not to trip over Brunhilde as she wrapped herself around his legs in serpentine circles. 

“Why do you even like me so much?” he muttered as he left his room, stopping short in the hallway as a sensation like deja vu came over him. At his feet, Brunhilde peeped as Tony realized it wasn’t deja vu, but nostalgia, and it was coming from the scent of ham, eggs, and coffee from the kitchen. 

Tony wasn’t trying to sneak up on Loki, but upon entering the kitchen and realizing Loki had no idea he was there, he stopped to silently watch him. Loki stood at the stove, shifting absently from foot to foot, a spatula in one hand. Tony opened his mouth to ask him what he was making but paused, hesitating. Loki, who was always wrapped in layers of green and gold and black, covered from neck to ankles, was making breakfast in a t-shirt and lounge pants. The clothes were still black, but the contrast was striking, especially when the shirt--easily two sizes too large--slid down his shoulder. 

“What is it that Midgardians say?” Loki asked without turning. “Take a picture, it will last longer?” 

“You seemed busy,” Tony said after the split-second it took for him to find his tongue as he had been following the curve of Loki’s long neck over his bare shoulder. 

“Someone has to use the kitchen.” Loki slid the spatula into the pan and lifted out a fried egg. He placed the egg on top of a sandwich covered in melted cheese that Tony hadn’t noticed earlier. Turning towards him finally, with a drowsy expression on his face that was as much of a departure from his usual mien as the clothes, he offered Tony the plate. 

If he hadn’t just woken to Brunhilde pulling on his eyelashes, Tony might have thought he was dreaming. When he hesitated, trying to jam his thoughts into coherent order, mild annoyance colored Loki’s face. 

“If you don’t want it, just say so.” 

“No, I do! I’m just not used to having breakfast made for me,” he replied as he took the plate. 

“There’s still limp kale in the fridge if you’re incapable of appreciating a croque madame,” Loki said, his voice colored with playful mockery. He tugged the t-shirt up over his shoulder as he crossed back to the stove, an effort that proved futile when he picked up the spatula and the sleeve slid down again. 

“From the smell, I had thought you were making eggs benedict.” Tony set the plate down next to the coffeemaker just long enough to fill a mug. 

“Mmmm. Also very good. I should make that sometime,” Loki said, clearly talking to himself as his voice trailed off. He turned off the burner before placing the remaining egg on top of the other sandwich. Without further addressing Tony, he poured himself some coffee and brushed past him into the dining room. Tony looked down at the sandwich in his hand, trying to reconcile the surreal feeling of having had breakfast made for him by his fake boyfriend. 

“When did you learn how to cook?” Tony asked as he joined Loki. Loki was already eating and didn’t respond, offering Tony a weary, annoyed glance at the question. From the other room came the distinctive noise of a cat jumping down from somewhere high. 

“My mother began teaching me when I was a child.” Loki dug a small piece of ham from his sandwich and leaned to one side, when he straightened up it was without the ham, and from under the table Tony could hear noisy cat chewing. “Odin doted on Thor. He was at his side from sunup to sundown. Fortunately my mother was more sensible and made time for both of her children.”

“This is great,” Tony said, gesturing to the sandwich with his fork. “You know, I’ve always wondered. You’re technically a frost giant, right?” 

“Technically,” said Loki, his upper lip curling as his gaze grew withering. 

“So why are you...you? Why aren’t you blue and angry all the time?” 

“I am rarely not angry.” Halfway through his sandwich now, Loki drummed his fingers on the table impatiently. 

Tony shrugged. “I’ve just been thinking about this in conjunction with the gadget you gave me.” 

“And how, exactly, does my parentage relate to your research?” 

Leaning forward to prop his elbows on the table, Tony laced his fingers together and rested his chin on them. “You are two things at once, Asgardian and frost giant, but you only look like one at a time, rather than a hybrid of some sort.” From across the table, Loki gave him a long-suffering stare from over his coffee mug. “So the thing with the gadget is that it looks like a mouse or a bird, but it’s not either of them. Its real form is that puddle of polymers and metals that it melts into between transformations.” 

“You think so, do you?” 

“Yeah! Because it’s not a device at all--it’s a medium.” At Loki’s blank stare he continued. “If I take clay and make a statue, the clay doesn’t stop being clay even though it looks different. Even if if you fire it and glaze it it’s still clay. So before I can even understand what your device does and why it does it, I need to study the medium.” 

Still drumming his fingers, Loki asked, “What does that have to do with my heritage again?” 

“Isn’t it obvious? You’re not a frost giant or an Asgardian. You’re  _ Loki _ . And that doesn’t change.” 

Loki’s face changed in a way that almost startled Tony. His gaze softened as his brows knit, and from Tony’s perspective, he seemed nervous. Nervous was not an adjective he would use for Loki, except for maybe when Thor was around and in a bad mood, so seeing it at the kitchen table was bizarre. 

“What did I say?” Tony asked. 

“I’ll show you how to make the mouse dissolve later,” Loki said, as if to answer as he picked up his plate and mug. With Brunhilde meowing at his heels, he took his dishes into the kitchen. Tony watched him go with the distinct feeling that this tableau, with Loki in baggy clothes followed by a naked cat, would be the strangest thing he’d ever see in the morning. 


	6. Chapter 6

**Excerpt from a letter to Frigga**

_...early on, I was reprimanded for not going to class. I’m sure you, of all people, understand what a foolish thing it is for me to be required to attend Midgardian classes, but I digress. Anthony, despite his tendency to get lost in his workshop for days at a time, is an exemplary student, so I asked him to tutor me. Mind you, this was merely out of boredom, but he agreed just the same.... _

* * *

 

“I’m not sure if Professor Pym’s lab is a good place for a cat,” said Tony as he glanced up at Brunhilde where she was snuggled into Loki’s fur collar, her belly pressing against the bare skin of his neck. 

“And that would be a valid concern were she a Midgardian housecat.” As they walked across the quad together, Loki reached up to scratch Brunhilde’s velvet-soft chin. She perked up her head, stretched to give him better access, and then licked his fingers a few times before burrowing back down into the fur. “But given her pedigree, it’s unlikely that any feeble attempts at science Midgardians have made would affect her.” 

“You’re going to have to cut that out,” Tony said, the slightest hint of a sharp edge to his voice. 

That edge startled Loki so much that he stopped walking and looked over his shoulder to Tony, who had lagged behind by a few steps. “Pardon?” 

“I mean, we get it, you hate it here and think everything is beneath you--”

“Because it is,” he interrupted coolly. 

“--but if you’re going to constantly act like you’re superior to everyone and everything on Earth, you’re never going to convince your mom you’re in a happy relationship.”

Loki spun on his heel to face him, glancing quickly about to see if anyone could have heard, a mixture of anger, fear, and irritation rising from his stomach before he offered Tony a snake’s smile. Calm rejection of emotion was difficult, but mockery came quick and easy. “Surely you don’t want the entire campus to know about this little farce.” 

“I don’t get why you’re so defensive. You’re the one who asked me for help, and I’m the one who agreed to play along.” Tony spoke quietly enough that even if someone was passing, they would have to struggle to hear him. Loki eyed him with mild suspicion, waiting for the trick, waiting for him to raise his voice and embarrass him, but it didn’t happen. Tony continued to walk, his pace slow until he heard Loki fall into step with him. 

“And I’m certain you’ll play your part remarkably,” said Loki, sounding for all the world like a used car salesman. “But I don’t think anyone really needs to know about this folie a deux.” 

“If this is so embarrassing for you, why did you even tell your mom that you were dating someone?” 

Feeling heat on the back of his neck and his ears, Loki replied, “I’ve already explained my rationale to yo--oh no.” His voice and shoulders fell as, from across the quad, he got a glimpse of Thor on the sidewalk in front of them, heading their way with Janet, bug-sized, perched on his shoulder. A cold mixture of anger and fear settled in the center of his chest as he watched his brother approach, lifting the arm holding Mjolnir to wave at him. The right corner of his lips twitched. “I see no reason for this conversation to continue.” 

“Why not?” Tony asked. “You want to convince your mom--maybe you should try to convince Thor first.” Loki opened his mouth to speak, but was immediately interrupted. 

“BROTHER!” Thor’s exuberant whoop was loud enough that Kamala, who had been passing by with headphones on, jumped a little at the sound, turned around, then waved cheerfully at Thor. “It is good to see you again! And you, Friend Tony!” he said as he walked up to them, stopping in their path, blocking the sidewalk with his bulk. 

“Hey Thor, hey Janet,” Tony said with a little wave. Janet hopped from Thor’s shoulder, changing size so that when her feet touched the concrete she was big enough to give Tony a friendly hug.

“Hey Tony, hey Loki!” She turned to address Loki. “I was talking to Thor about your mom visiting. I’m so excited to meet her!” 

“I’m sure she’ll love you,” Loki said, trying to modulate his voice to the point where it wasn’t either flat or angry and only succeeding halfway. 

“I am gladdened by news brought to me by my beloved, brother! I owe thee congratulations for finding such a fulfilling relationship here on Midgard. I told you mortals weren’t as bad as you thought!” Thor clapped Loki on the shoulder hard enough that Loki stumbled slightly, needing to take one step to the left to steady himself, a flush rising on his cheeks at the clumsy move. 

Once steady, Loki glanced up at his brother, his heart sinking lower into his chest as he sunk lower into his jacket. Noticing the change, Brunhilde perked up and sniffed the air, trying to discern the cause of Loki’s sudden shift in posture. “Yes. Thank you,” he said flatly through gritted teeth. Out of the corner of his eyes he could see Tony, looking characteristically bemused. “If you don’t mind I was on my way--” 

“Hold a moment, brother. You must allow me tell you how pleased it makes me to know you have found so worthy of a partner,” Thor said.

At the word “worthy” Loki ground his clenched teeth. Beside Tony, Janet was smiling. Her cheerful demeanor was marred by a hard edge in her eyes and it didn’t take any time for Loki to decide that this was, in some way, punishment for lying to Tony. There was atonement in his future. On a mental to-do list he added the phrase “tickets for NY fashion week,” hoping that would be enough to appease her before realizing his brother was still talking. 

“Thou hast been alone for too long, brother. It pained me to see you so lonely,” Thor continued. His eyes lit on Brunhilde as she headbutted Loki’s cheek. With a knowing chuckle, Thor said, “It would seem that mother is as confident in the success of this relationship as I am. But why didn’t you tell me? When I began dating Jan I told everyone!” 

“Not everyone is as extroverted as you, cupcake,” Janet said with a small laugh. 

“Yes, I recall. My ears are still ringing from your volume,” Loki muttered, completely deflated. 

“Actually, that was my choice,” Tony said, as he stepped up to Loki’s side. “It’s been a while since I’ve been in a real relationship and I didn’t want to jinx it.” 

“I see!” Thor shouted. This time it was Tony’s turn to lose his footing as Thor pounded his shoulder with an affectionate hand. “But thou needst not worry. My brother is very choosy and would not have begun dating you if he did not care about you deeply--right Loki?” 

Loki glanced helplessly to his side to find Tony wearing an awkward smile and a dark flush. The smallest wave of relief washed over him. If he was going to be humiliated, at least Tony could share in it. “Thor. Brother. I’m going to be late for class,” Loki said, making a herculean effort to unclench his teeth. 

“What a phrase to hear from your lips, brother!” Thor turned to Tony as he spoke. “When we were children, Loki had an excuse for every class. You must be a very good influence.” 

“I try,” said Tony with a wry grin. 

“Then I shall not keep thee. Enjoy your class, brother and Friend Tony!” Thor patted Tony on the shoulder and moved off of the sidewalk, letting them pass much to Loki’s immense relief. 

“That wasn’t so bad,” Tony said once Thor and Jan were out of earshot. “He seemed convinced.” 

“It is no easier to convince a dog that you actually intend to throw a ball you are not going to throw than it is to convince Thor of anything.” 

“Wait wait wait!” Janet jogged back to them as they walked away, her heels clicking on the concrete. “Hey I wanted to ask you guys, when your mom gets here, do you think we should all go out together?” 

“Absolutely not!” said Loki, cheeks and ears burning. 

“I don’t see why not,” replied Tony at the same time. 

“I see a host of reasons why not!” Loki snapped. 

“Wow, you two sure bicker like a couple.” Janet nodded decisively. “Do this in front of your mom and she’ll never suspect a thing.” 

“You know very little about my mother.” Loki shifted as Brunhilde stood and wound her way around his neck, disturbed by the shouting. She licked his cheek again, this time more vigorously than the last, her concern taking the form of wet sandpaper. 

“Well, I’m going to get to know her, but I’m sure she’s wonderful.” Janet smiled as Loki did too, despite himself. “By the way, Tony, pizza and video games tonight, right?” 

“Oh shit! I totally forgot,” Tony said, slipping his hand into his jacket pocket where Loki knew the Asgardian device was stored. “But yeah, of course! Are you going to join us?” Tony asked Loki, as if having forgotten that he was temporarily living there. 

Relief brushed its fingers across Loki’s sweaty brow. Eager to change the subject, he swung around to face Jan, his coat flapping with the speed in which his attention turned to her. “Why not?” he replied with a casual shrug. “But if you accuse me of using magic to win at Mario Kart again I’m going to be very cross with you.” 

“Nobody wins 15 times in a row without cheating, Loki.” Janet stuck out her tongue, but her demeanor was still cheerful. “See you guys at 7!” With that, she snapped down to bug size and zipped off, her wings humming as she darting back to Thor’s side. 

* * *

“This is amazing!!!” Professor Pym had been looking at the Asgardian mousebird under an electron microscope for a solid ten minutes, shouting interjections of excitement every minute or two. “I’ve never seen unstable molecules like this before, not even in the weapons we retrieved after Kang the Conqueror attacked!”

Upon a huge screen on the wall of Professor Pym’s chemistry lab was a model of the molecule making up the majority of the Asgardian device. Having only taken 4 actual chemistry classes and had minor tutoring from Tony, Loki had difficulty parsing the model on the wall. Midgardian technology was ancient in comparison to Asgardian, so it was much like trying to discern how neanderthals made decisions on what to hunt. All he gathered was that it was, like everything on Migard, made up of atoms, and that a portion of it--the portion not made of undiscovered elements--was gold. 

“See, that’s what I mean,” said Tony from the professor’s side. Using a laser pointer, he circled a couple spots on the model. “This shouldn’t happen in nature, and this is way too organic for a mechanical object. And there’s no reason it should be so heavy, given its component parts.” 

“Oh! That’s an easy answer. Everything on Asgard is 3 times as dense as on Earth.” Pym glanced at Loki, then back at Tony. “Try to pick him up and you’ll see what I mean.” 

“I’d rather you not,” Loki muttered. 

“Just for a second? You’re the only Asgardian I know that I could even  _ try _ to pick up,” Tony said, approaching. 

“You know Amora.” 

“Yeah, and I know better than to try to pick her up.” Tony chuckled while Loki shrugged. 

“Go ahead then” 

“You sure?” asked Tony, even as he circled around to Loki’s back, readying himself to pick him up. 

“Yes, just get it over with quickly.” Loki felt a flush rise on the back of his neck. Then Tony was behind him, grabbing him around the waist as if he was trying to suplex him, and something within Loki froze. 

The memory was an old one, hundreds of years at least, and for a split second Loki was no longer in Professor Pym’s lab with Tony hugging him from behind, but in Asgard, in his wing of the palace. He couldn’t remember the name of the woman who had slipped her arms around his waist, resting her head on his shoulder blade, but it didn’t matter because he remembered the feeling--the warm, the comfort, the intimate longing satisfied by a single touch. And Tony was so, so warm. 

There was a lump in Loki’s throat when his consciousness snapped out of the memory to the sound of Tony grunting as he tried, to no avail, to lift Loki off of the ground. With a hefty sigh, Tony released him, and that frozen place inside of Loki’s chest ached. 

“Is that why I can’t lift Mjolnir?” Tony asked, slightly out of breath. 

“No, of course not.” Loki smoothed his rumpled jacket while Brunhilde hopped from his shoulder, displeased by the shuffling around. “That’s an enchantment, an extremely powerful one. In your suit you would be able to lift me without much trouble, but you will never be able to lift that bloody hammer.” 

Professor Pym frowned at the word “enchantment”. “Asgardian technology may be indistinct from magic to us right now, but science will figure it out eventually. We just need time to improve our--” 

“Ugh! Not you too,” Loki muttered with disgust in his voice.”Do tell me, Professor, how this is a form of technology.” With a gesture, Loki summoned his sword from the ether and tapped it on the nearby metal table, making a solid clanging noise before he banished it back to where he’d found it. 

“That could very well be some kind of mutant or inhuman pow--” Professor Pym began before Loki cut him off. 

“Mutants are a Midgardian phenomenon. If you knew one whit about Asgard you’d know that.” 

“And there’s nothing that says Asgard doesn’t have its own mutants or Inhumans,” Professor Pym added calmly. “I’m sure there are different names for it but there is likely a similar physiology at work.” Loki only scoffed in response. 

While he spoke, Tony circled around him to stand beside Professor Pym again and Loki watched him, pressing his lips into a thin line as Tony’s attention shifted from the apparent interest in him to interest in what Professor Pym had to say. 

The model of the mousebird on the screen changed from molecular to an exploded holographic view, much like the view of Tony’s armor that Loki had seen several times in his workshop. Loki tapped his foot, watching Brunhilde from the corner of his eye as she leapt up onto the metal table beside him which full of erlenmeyer flasks, test tubes, and other scientific equipment. She slid, her paws finding no purchase on the slippery surface, and nearly knocked over a row of empty test tubes. Loki smiled and stroked her back as Tony and the professor chattered excitedly with one another. 

“I already scanned it into J.A.R.V.I.S. to compare it to every piece of recovered alien technology that S.H.I.E.L.D. has in the database but I couldn’t find anything even remotely similar,” Tony said as the model spun in front of him. 

“Well, I’m not surprised about that; it’s likely that the only tech we have as advanced as this is Asgardi--did you just imply that you hacked into the S.H.I.E.L.D. database?” Professor Pym’s tone shifted from exuberant to suspicious, and from behind them, Loki grinned. 

“I didn’t hack into it,” Tony replied, shifting from one foot to the other. “They have everything running on the campus wifi, the wifi that I have the password for because I set it up. They effectively left the door open.” 

“Well, I’m going to have to talk to Fury about this. Changing the definition doesn’t mean you didn’t access a database that is forbidden to students.” Though Pym’s back was to Loki, he could hear the frown in his voice and rolled his eyes. 

“You said the only kind of tech that would even compare to this would be Asgardian,” Tony said, swiftly changing the subject. “Hey Loki, do you have anything else we could look at?” he asked without turning, his fingers flying over the keys at the computer he was in front of. 

Though a warm wash of pleasure rolled through Loki at Tony’s renewed attention, the fact that he had asked for something without facing him was maddening. Loki watched Brunhilde sniff the row of test tubes she had almost knocked over, then carefully wind her way around them. Loki huffed through his nose, then shot out his hand to bat the test tubes onto the ground where they shattered with a pleasingly sharp sound. 

“Oh no,” Loki said flatly as both Professor Pym and Tony spun, startled by the noise. “Brunhilde that was very rude of you.” He scooped her up. “It seems Anthony was right; a science lab is no place for a cat. Good luck with your quaint Midgardian science,” Loki said, his tone snide as he left the room with Brunhilde cradled in his arms, looking back just once to see Professor Pym carting a broom over to the broken test tubes. 

* * *

On his new bed in Tony’s tower, with Brunhilde on his chest, Loki stared at the ceiling.

“That was an unnecessarily trying day,” he murmured to Brunhilde. As if in response, she began kneading her paws on his neck. “Yes, I know,” he said as he stroked her back. “This is but a necessary evil that will be over soon.” 

He glanced to the side at the portrait of Fenrir. “Poor little Loki,” he muttered. “Bringer of Ragnarok. Banished to Midgard for supposed eternity while my dullard of a brother stays here by choice.” Anger brushed past him for the briefest moment but didn’t stick. Instead, he remained irritated, but not at Midgard, at the memory that had assailed him in Pym’s lab. 

“I don’t  _ need _ that.” Loki addressed Brunhilde who simply blinked at him. “I don’t want it. I don’t need it. I’m just going to go and eat pizza and play video games with my supposed friends and I don’t--” 

Now, as if annoyed by his outburst, Brunhilde stood up and began walking away. 

“No!” Loki grabbed her though she squirmed and held her close to his chest, pressing his face against the soft skin of her neck. She reared around and bit him on the cheek before darting off, this time tearing out of the room. 

“Fine.” Loki swung his legs over the side of the bed and sat there, looking past the portrait of Fenrir. “Well, that’s just fine.” 


	7. Chapter 7

Since he was losing at Mario Kart yet again, Tony glanced at Loki where he sat in the overstuffed leather armchair. He was focused entirely on the game--unsurprisingly so given that he and Janet had been neck in neck since they began playing two hours ago. The chair was too big for him; it would fit another person easily as he sat back in it, his legs folded underneath him, face locked in an expression of determination. 

“That is the sixth time you’ve gotten a blue shell,” Loki said sharply, his voice just below yelling as he turned to Janet. Janet, having won at the last minute, grinned and grabbed the enormous to-go cup of orange soda she’d been nursing for hours. 

“Looks like you  _ aren’t _ using magic to win after all,” she said, beaming. The half-eaten pizza sat open on the coffee table where she rested her feet, crossed at the ankles. “Or maybe it’s just not working tonight, looooooser.” 

Loki simply rolled his eyes. “Best 13 out of 27?” he asked, the earlier irritation Tony had seen in the lab completely gone from his face. Instead he was smiling, a real smile, rare outside of their little circle. 

Tony had a thought he’d been having frequently since Loki talked him into faking this relationship with him: Loki was nice to be around. When it was just the three of them, or as was currently often, the two of them, he wasn’t that bad. He didn’t stop mocking or trying to trick people, but he was a loyal friend who actually  _ showed _ that he valued their friendship--the hot breakfasts Loki kept making sprung to mind while Tony watched him. He realized then that he was staring and turned his attention to the tv instead.

“You guys gonna let me win one or should I just go work on the Mark IX?” Tony teased, reaching for the slice of pizza he’d left on the end table next to the sofa. When he found an empty plate he blinked in confusion while staring at it, as if he couldn’t believe that nothing was there. “Where the hell did my pizza go?” he asked, leaning over to look under the end table. He saw nothing, and heard the sound of the race starting. “You guys suck.” 

Without acknowledging Tony outside of a noncommittal “I don’t know” sound, Janet shouted “You’re already cheating!” With a disgusted grunt she thumped one foot against the coffee table so hard that the pizza box jumped. 

“How am I supposed to cheat if I’ve got both hands on the controller?” Loki held up the controller indignantly. “I don’t just repeat phrases and have things become real--my magic doesn’t work that way. I am a sorcerer. There are hand motions--like this.” He released one half of the controller and flicked his fingers. A green puff of light colored both his fingertips and Jan’s controller, which lurched to the right in her hands. 

“See? Cheating!” 

“A demonstration is hardly cheating and may I remind you that you threw a breadstick at me in the first game!” 

While they squabbled, Tony circled around the end table to find a red smudge on the cream-colored carpet. “The ‘bots are going to have a hard time getting that out,” Tony muttered to himself as he crouched and looked around. Not a foot away was a pepperoni, and in front of that, a slice of green pepper. Though Tony was pretty sure he knew why a piece of pizza had mysteriously traveled out of the living room and down the hall towards his bedroom, he wanted to see it for himself. 

Halfway to his bedroom a large piece of cheese had sloughed off of the pizza and a snail’s trail of marinara led right to the doorway of his room. Sitting there, wearing the black cashmere sweater Loki had just bought her, was Brunhilde, crouched over the pizza with her teeth sunk into the crust. 

“Oh for fuck’s sake.” Tony crouched and reached for the pizza, stopping when a loud warning growl came from Brunhilde’s throat. “I’m pretty sure pizza isn’t on your diet.” Managing to get his arms around her enough to pick her up, he carried her, still chewing on the pizza that she refused to drop, out into the living room. “Loki, you’re going to have to keep a better eye on her.” 

Loki glanced up from the controller, eyebrows furrowed in frustration until he saw Brunhilde on her back with a slice of pizza clutched to her chest. He stood, tossing the controller onto his empty chair, and crossed the room to take Brunhilde, with the delicacy of someone holding an infant, into his arms. “What a good huntress,” he said, his voice betraying unadulterated amusement as he kissed the top of her head. She growled again and he raised a brow at her. “Alright, no more pizza. We’re going to go wash your sweater.” Easily extracting the pizza from her grip he tossed it onto his empty plate while walking through the living room and down the hall to his temporary room. 

Janet, who finished the game alone due to Loki abandoning it, used the controller to turn off the system before setting it on the coffee table. “I don’t know who he is around that cat, but it’s definitely not Loki.” 

“I know, it’s weird.” Tony closed the pizza box and picked it up. “It’s like living with...I don’t know, somebody who’s a mom half the time and a catty supermodel for the rest.” Janet raised a brow, but Tony barely saw it as he passed her on the way to the kitchen. 

“Are you really okay with doing this for him?” Janet asked, hopping off the couch to carry the plates into the kitchen after him. “You don’t have to. You’re a friend, but you  _ can _ say no when a friend asks you for something. I know you said it was fine, but you do way too much for people sometimes.”   
  
“I’ve already made up my mind,” Tony replied as she followed him. “And it’s been okay so far. He doesn’t do anything to bother me. Brunhilde is worse, actually. I found her sleeping in the helmet for the Mark IX the other day.” He opened the fridge to put the pizza box into it. Seeing the refrigerator full of fresh things Loki had bought on his last shopping trip, he smiled. “Actually, he’s been cooking for us. This morning we had Belgian waffles with strawberries and whipped cream.” 

“He makes  _ breakfast _ for you?” 

“He cooks a lot, actually.” Tony straightened up and raised his arms above his head, stretching. “Have you ever heard of a croque madame?” Jan shook her head. “I hadn’t either. He made it for me--us--the first morning he was here. Always coffee ready in the morning too.” Tony grinned a little. “A guy could get used to that.” 

Jan stared with mild suspicion. “He hasn’t like, put a charm on you or made a voodoo doll or something, has he?” 

“Not that I know of. I doubt he would. I did agree to help him out, after all.” Tony grabbed a paper towel and returned to the living room to pick up the remains of the pizza Brunhilde had stolen. 

“Huh,” Jan said as she followed him, brows furrowed, looking slightly to her right as she pondered. “Did he tell you everything you need to know about his mom and stuff?” 

From the floor where he was picking up cheese and trying to get marinara off the berber Tony asked, “What do you mean?” 

“Ugh. Haven’t you ever watched TV or read a romance novel? Or fanfiction?” Janet turned off the Wii while Tony cleaned. “The biggest problem with pretending to be someone’s significant other is communication!”

“This isn’t a movie,” Tony said with a little laugh. 

“Yeah, well.” Janet stuck out her bottom lip. “Do you know what to say?” 

Tossing the paper towel into the kitchen garbage, Tony paused, looking blankly into the middle distance before turning his attention back to Jan. “You know what? I don’t.” 

* * *

The door to Loki’s room was open, but as far as Tony could tell, Loki wasn’t inside. On the off-chance he was in the closet, Tony knocked on the doorframe and said, “Hey Loki? I need to talk to you for a minute.”

“Come in.” The reply came from the left side of the room, past the open door to the bathroom. Light spilled out from the in-suite bathroom and Tony hesitated for a moment before deciding he must be brushing his hair or something else innocuous, otherwise he wouldn’t have invited him in. 

Loki was not brushing his hair. Instead, he was on his knees in front of a bathtub full of sudsy water, arms plunged in down to the elbow. Dead center in the tub was Brunhilde, batting playfully at suds as they swam by on the surface of the water. “What did you need?” Loki asked without turning, and for the briefest instant, Tony couldn’t remember. If seeing Loki in his casual clothes was enough to make Tony briefly speechless, what he was wearing now stuck him in the doorway, unable to enter the room without quite realizing why. 

Loki was in a tank top. There was nothing abnormal about a tank top. Tony wore them all the time, as did Jan. There was just something about when Loki dressed down that left a confused tightness in Tony’s chest. He stood there silent. 

“What did you want?” Loki asked as he used a washcloth to gently stroke Brunhilde’s back. He was wet up to the mid-upper arm, and when he turned to look at Tony, Tony could see that his hair was pinned back with bobby pins. The tableau was too strange for Tony to shake himself out of the stare. 

“Why are you washing Brunhilde?” He asked once he found his tongue. 

“Hairless cats need a bath once a week,” Loki replied as he splashed some water in her direction. Brunhilde stood up on her back legs and pounced at the splash, ending up under water just long enough for Loki to wash her tail. “Was that what you wanted to ask?” 

“Uh. No.” 

Loki sat back on his heels, shooting Tony a dubious look. “I suppose if you want to watch Brunhilde get a bath you’re welcome to,” he said as he turned back to her. “It’s your house.” 

Tony watched as he leaned forward into the bath, arms disappearing under the suds. The initial reason he’d been looking for Loki struck him. “I wanted to talk to you about relationships.” 

“Oh that sounds  _ delightful _ ,” Loki said. Though he was turned away from Tony, he could hear the sneer in his voice. 

“How else are we going to keep our stories straight in front of your mom? You’re the one who wants this to be believable, and I know if I fuck something up you’re not going to let me live it down.” 

“How well you know me.” Loki stood, grabbing a fluffy towel from the counter and holding it over one arm as he reached into the tub with the other. With some reluctance, Brunhilde let him pick her up, but as he tried to wrap her in the towel she squirmed out of his arms, streaking down the hallway after running through Tony’s legs, wiping suds onto his jeans. “If we must do this, let’s do it briefly.” 

In the dining room, Loki sat across from Tony with his hands neatly folded and resting on the table. His expression was that of someone hiding a grimace. Tony drummed his fingers thoughtfully on the table. “So when’s the last time you were in a relationship?” Tony asked, eyeing him curiously. This was necessary information, but was a part of Tony that wanted to know--whether or not it was related to fooling Frigga.

The grimace hiding under Loki’s placid expression broke out and played over his face like a shadow. “How is that relevant?” 

“It’s something we would have talked about if we’ve been together for a while.” Tony continued to drum his fingers. “Bad relationships, good ones that ended despite being good, that kind of thing.” 

“Would we now?” Loki shifted, bringing his elbows up onto the table and lacing his fingers together before leaning against them. “I’m afraid you don’t know very much about me if you think we’d be chatting about exes.” 

“For fuck’s sake Loki. I’m trying to help, remember?” Though Tony didn’t suffer from headaches very frequently, he swore he could feel one coming on as he glared at Loki’s blank face. 

“Lorelei,” Loki said, with the smallest hint of a smile playing over his sly lips. “Decades ago. Maybe a century?” He waved a hand dismissively. “It’s so hard to keep track.”

“A century? I always forget how old you are.” Tony furrowed his brow in thought as Loki merely shrugged. 

“She went on to date Thor,” he said, showing his teeth in what looked like it was meant to be a smile but held too much bald malice to really qualify. “Any more fun memories you want me to relive for your amusement? Or, rather. What was your last relationship like? When was it? Did it end abruptly?” With a mock gasp, Loki leaned forward, eyes alight despite the darkness on his face. “Did I break it up?” 

“Trust me, I’m not doing this because I find it fun. If I was, it would have just stopped being fun,” he murmured. “It was about a year ago. Her name was Amelia, she worked at Apple. Got involved with her during a patent dispute and had about 8 months of fun before she broke it off. So no, you’re not a homewrecker.” 

“Pity. Would have made a fun story.” 

Tony jiggled his leg as he thought. “Okay, do you want kids?” 

The laugh that came from Loki was loud enough that Tony actually jumped at the sound. “Oh, Anthony.” Loki shook his head, still wearing the unsettling smile. “Ask Odin.” 

“Why would I--” 

“He’s the one who keeps imprisoning them.” 

“You. Wait. Wait wait wait.” Tony held up a finger in a “please hang on” gesture as he tried to wrap his head around what he’d just learned. “You’re a father.” 

“Sort of.” 

“Sort of?” Tony dropped his hand to the table, the incredulous look in his eyes growing stronger as Loki spoke. 

“I think we’ve established that I’m not always a man, correct?” Loki rested his chin in one hand and cast a weary gaze at Tony. 

“So...you’re a mother?” 

“Sort. Of.” 

“You’re a parent.” 

“Now you’ve got it.” 

“What the  _ fuck _ ?” 

“Oh, Anthony.” Loki tsked and shook his head without lifting it his chin from his hand. “If you need to know how procreation works maybe we  _ do _ need to establish whether or not we’re having sex.” 

A hot flush played across Tony’s cheeks and he looked away from Loki, at nothing, then at the clock in the kitchen as if he wasn’t wearing a smartwatch and had his phone sitting next to him on the table. “It’s not that. It’s just that I--I guess never thought about what you did in Asgard before coming to the Academy.” 

“I suspect that lack of intellectual curiosity is a Midgardian thing, though I wouldn’t have expected it from you.” 

“What did you mean when you said Odin imprisoned your children? What the fuck kind of father does that with his grandkids? What the fuck kind of  _ person _ does something like that?” Tony ignored the statement about curiosity, hot anger like heartburn settling in his chest as he suddenly made the other connection Loki’s statement implied. 

“Not all of them. My daughter was given the very prestigious position of goddess of death, which does well to keep her out of Asgard, oh, and to keep her parent from visiting,” Loki said with a sneer. “The rest, well. All dangerous, just like Loki--too dangerous to keep in Asgard without chains.” 

Tony stared, taking in the darkness in Loki’s green eyes, the dangerous set of his jaw. “I really don’t know anything about you, do I?” 

“I’d suspect that nobody on Midgard, save for Amora and my brother, does.” Loki gave a weary sigh and stared past Tony into the middle distance. “Anyway, I have a very lovely daughter right now. She’s very good at hunting pizza and socks. Now, what about you, Anthony? Do you want children?”

“I’m starting to regret this conversation,” Tony said with a weak chuckle. 

“Ah, then we feel the same way about something. How novel.” 

“So. Yes and no. I like kids, but I think about how much spare time I have and wonder what kind of dad I’d even be if I was gone all the time.” Something dark passed over Tony’s face as he sat back in the dining chair, watching Loki’s attention drift to the middle distance behind him. “Where do I take you? Do we go out to dinner, movies, red carpet events?” 

Loki’s attention snapped back to Tony, his smile closer to genuine this time--it reached his eyes, at least. “Something tells me I wouldn’t be walking red carpets with you, not without all of Midgard hearing about it on TMZ.” Tony absently ran his fingers over the carefully trimmed lines of his goatee while offering an acquiescing nod. 

“Alright, you’ve got a point.” Tony stood up, the energy building up in the back of his mind too overpowering to keep sitting. He paced as he spoke. “So we met, what, the way we actually met? Janet puts a bunch of embarrassing photos of you on Facebook and she needs my help to get them taken down?” 

“I see no reason to complicate things further by coming up with some story.” From the corner of the room there was the smallest meow, and they both turned to see Brunhilde hauling a sock into the room, dragging it between her legs in such a way that she had to waddle to avoid stepping on it. 

“Why does she steal  _ my _ socks?” Tony asked and walked up to Brunhilde and crouched, taking the sock as she dropped it. 

“There’s no accounting for taste,” Loki replied. “So we met the way we met, we go to dinner and the movies, and we don’t talk about the future overmuch.” 

“I guess,” Tony said as he straightened up, holding the sock. He looked at it blankly, still stuck on the concept of Loki having children,  _ imprisoned children _ ,  then balled it up and threw it down the hallway towards his room. Brunhilde’s paws slid wildly across the linoleum before she was able to take off and chase it down the hallway at top speed, little claws digging into the carpeting as she ran. 

“Any other questions can be fielded by saying ‘We haven’t really talked about that yet’, don’t you think?” 

“I guess,” he repeated, watching Brunhilde skid to a stop in front of the sock, grabbing it and flopping to her side, hugging the sock to her body while kicking at it. “You didn’t make any of this up, did you?” 

“I may have. There’s no way for you to know, is there?” 

“Well, I do know one thing about you,” Tony said as he turned his attention from Brunhilde to Loki, who had crossed his arms on the table to rest his head on them. “When you lie it’s to make yourself look better.” 

“How clever,” Loki muttered. 

“None of this makes you look good, or bad, for that matter. So it’s probably true.” 

“Stress this assumption of yours in front of my mother. I’m sure she’ll find it charming.” 

“Maybe I will. What’s better proof that I’m dating you then the fact that I know when you’re lying or not?” 

“Oh, Anthony,” Loki repeated as he got to his feet, sighing as he lightly pushed the chair back under the table. “Learn every single thing about me if you must, but you will  _ never _ know when I’m lying. You don’t get to be the god of something without being the best there is.” He rounded the table and patted Tony amiably on the shoulder as he passed, heading towards the kitchen.

“If that’s true, you’re definitely not the god of lies,” Tony said, regretting his words immediately when Loki spun, his eyes dark and jaw set. “Because uh. Because Jan can usually tell when you’ve made something up.” 

“Unimportant things, perhaps, and the Bug Woman does have a certain amount of, shall we say, talent in that aspect. But, Anthony,  _ you _ will never know when I’m lying.” 

“I’ll tell Jan you gave her a backhanded compliment,” Tony muttered. 

“I’d rather you didn’t,” Loki said, his voice distant away now that he was in the kitchen. “But I can’t stop you, can I? We don’t have  _ that _ kind of relationship.” 

“What kind? The kind where I don’t talk to my best friend?” 

“The kind where I order you to do something and you do it.” Even from the kitchen, Tony could hear the change in Loki’s voice. It was playful now, teasing, as his voice so often was, in such a way that made it impossible to believe he was serious. “Those are fun.” 

“Oh ha ha,” Tony replied, feeling a flush rise on his face at the implication of Loki’s words. There was something about them that struck him, unsettled him, and intrigued him in a way he wasn’t quite sure he understood or wanted to. Since it seemed like the best way to get away from that melange of emotions, Tony started his way to the elevator to the workshop. He barely heard Loki shout that he was making pork tenderloin and that Tony was welcome to some as the doors closed and soft, pleasant music drowned out everything outside the elevator. 


	8. Chapter 8

**Excerpt from a letter to Frigga**

 

_...I’m dying for you to meet him. You’ll love him, I’m sure. He’s brilliant enough that even Asgardians would--should be impressed with what he has managed to create. Have I ever mentioned why he has that source of energy in his chest? He survived something terrible and saved his own life through ingenuity and mechanical skill alone. It is too long a tale for a letter, and he does not speak of it often, for obvious reasons--Midgardians are far more fearful of death than we are. A function of their short lives, I suppose._

_Anyway, I look forward to your visit more than you could ever know. There are things I dearly wish for you to see, and while Anthony is, of course, chief among them, I’m certain there are things on Midgard that will interest you greatly._

_With Love,_

_Loki_

_P.S. Brunhilde is every bit the darling you suspected her to be._

* * *

 

There was no amount of preparation that could make it so Loki was ready to see his mother again. Years had passed on Midgard, years where Loki had suffered the indignity of being treated like an average Midgardian student--as average as one could be at Avengers Academy--but he knew for Asgard they would be nothing. For his mother, he was certain, it would have felt like he had been gone for days, not years.

On the day she was to arrive, Loki sat on the edge of his bed sobbing silently into his hands. Behind him, Brunhilde headbutted his back, mewing in confusion at Loki’s distress, her wide odd eyes betraying sharp intelligence. When he didn’t respond to her, she sank down on the bed, wiggled her rear end, and leapt onto his back, claws digging into his jacket when she (intentionally) missed the ruff. Loki grunted at the sensation but did nothing else to acknowledge her.

Loki put no stock into the premonitory potential of dreams, but the prior night he had dreamt of a closed bifrost and a clock ticking by the hours, first 1, then 5, then 24. Once the anger at his subconscious had faded away, the great fear that had tickled the back of his mind for two weeks broke unceremoniously to the forefront, breaking his resolve with it.

She wouldn’t come.

There would be something, anything that stopped her. Odin would forbid it. Demands of the kingdom would hold her back at the last moment and in a week he would receive an apology that he would accept graciously while still despairing over the loss of the visit.

She wasn’t lying about her desire to visit, of course, he would have known if she were, but the certainty of some cosmic joke stopping her from being able to come seemed complete.

There was a knock on his door. He lifted his head from his hands and, with a delicate motion of two fingers, covered up the fact that he had been crying with a glamour spell--the easiest of incantations and a boon to the vain.

“Yes?”

“Can I come in?” Tony asked from behind the closed door.

“Yes.” Brunhilde finished climbing his back and leaned into his face, licking first his ear, then his cheek, giving him a furious bath as she settled into his fur collar.

“She’s in a real mood today, huh?” he asked as he stepped into the room, holding a couple of suit jackets in his hand. “I don’t think I’ve ever seen her so affectionate.” Tony smiled when Brunhilde gave Loki’s cheek a gentle headbutt.

“She’s eager to go outside, I’m sure. She’s been cooped up in here for too long.”

“Ah, well she’s going to get to go out soon. What do you think, Loki? Should I dress up? Okay, I know I should dress up but what do I wear? Nice suit? Sport coat? T-shirt and a jacket for casual but not sloppy?”

“Has Janet been talking to you about clothes?” Loki asked with the raise of one brow. There was something charming about his uncertainty though, and the despair that had wracked Loki just seconds ago began to slowly extinguish.

“Why would you ask--yes.” A flush rose on Tony’s cheeks and Loki smiled. “I’ve never met a queen before, much less one I’m supposed to see as a potential in-law and I want to make a good impression.”

“In-law? Are you asking me to marry you? Because if in your opinion it was too fast for me to move in after 6 months well, I think that speaks for itself.” The simple joy of teasing away a serious question relaxed Loki by small degrees as he sat on his bed looking up at Tony.

“You know what I mean.”

“Do I?”

“Loki, please. I’m doing this for you.”

“You do love to remind me of that,” Loki muttered. “Wear something middle of the road. Nice button-down and a suit jacket. She’s a queen but I’m certain she doesn’t want Midgardians falling all over themselves to look formal for her.”

“Alright. If that’s what you think is best.” Tony separated the suit jacket out from the other two and tossed the rejected jackets over his arm. “Are you nervous?”

“Why would I be?” Loki asked, reaching up to extract Brunhilde, still grooming him, from his collar. “She’s my mother, the one person in Asgard that I can trust.”

“You grew up in Asgard,” Tony said, adjusting the jackets over his arm in an ineffectual manner. “Lived there for, what, a couple thousand years?”

“Give or take.”

“And there’s only one person you trust in the entire realm?”

“I’m not sure why that’s strange,” Loki turned from Tony to walk to the dresser where he fastened his gold necklace around his throat. In the mirror above the dresser he fluffed his hair without it needing to be fixed before he turned his attention on Tony again. “I was never the popular one like Thor, and who in their right mind would trust tricksey little Loki?” The bitterness burned in his voice like a furnace.

“You do make it kind of hard to trust you,” Tony said, pausing as he waited for the inevitable response that didn’t come. “I mean, I don’t think you’re entirely untrustworthy--”

“I am.” Loki lifted his horned helm from the top of the dresser and slid it over his head.

“No, I don’t think that’s true.”

“I’m sure we’ve had this conversation before, and yet I continue to lie to you.” Loki adjusted the helm in the mirror.

“You trusted me with that Asgardian spying device,” Tony said as he leaned on the door frame with his jackets. “That’s something.”

“It is, isn’t it? Are you going to get dressed?”

“Yeah, I probably should huh? See you in half-hour,” he said as he left the room. Loki could hear his footsteps down the hall. Once they disappeared, he dropped the glamour spell and glared at himself in the mirror--red eyes and tear streaks and all. In an instant the spell was in place and he turned away from the mirror and back to the bed. Brunhilde had found another sock and was licking it.

“This is behavior unbecoming of the daughter of a God,” Loki said as he tried to take the sock from her. She dug her front claws into it and tugged it back once before Loki could extract it from her grip. “You can have it back later. It’s time to go see your grandmother, so be on your best behavior.” As if to answer, Brunhilde bonked her head into his hand with a tiny, squeaky meow.

* * *

 

The greatest insult Loki was forced to endure at Avengers Academy was located on the east side of campus, nearly exactly opposite Stark Tower. There stood a dedicated doorway to the bifrost, open to all Asgardians who wished to visit the famous Academy. They came and they went and all the while the door was closed to Loki. Not that they needed a door. That was part of the insult. Heimdall never listens when Loki tries to return to Asgard, but all visitors get sent down the bifrost to a convenient and beautiful foyer.

On an average day, nothing could drag Loki to this side of campus. It didn’t matter that the doorway was near the street where the best food trucks set up, or that one of Loki’s many neglected classes was located in the building next door. It was bad enough to know the door was there much less see it.

Today, however, was different. Dressed in the finest Asgardian green and gold leather that illusions could provide, Loki stood in front of the doorway to the bifrost’s foyer, sun glinting off of the curved horns of his open helm, gripping his staff with full confidence as he waited for Frigga to arrive. Brunhilde was perched on his shoulder like a parrot, balancing easily on three paws as she washed her face with the fourth. Beside him, Tony fussed with the lapel of his jacket, an air of nervousness surrounding him like cologne.

“Should we be holding hands or...?” Tony asked, trailing off as he watched Thor and Janet arrive.

“Hey Loki!” Janet trotted up, wearing black leggings under a bright yellow chiffon sundress, a huge pair of oversized sunglasses perched on her head like a headband. “New York Fashion Week in a month!” She clapped, as exuberant as she was energetic, bouncing a little in her step as she came to stand in front of him.

“I’ve already purchased the tickets, you need not worry,” Loki said smoothly. “Soon you will be within arm’s reach of Oscar de la Renta and Proenza Schouler’s designs.”

The grin that split Janet’s face was radiant. “I can’t wait! I have to be ready to incorporate everything new and hot into my designs.” Like a dog who’d seen a squirrel, her attention rapidly shifted to Tony once she noticed him. “Hey! You picked the jacket I like. That was such a good decision. It really highlights the positives in your physique.” She gave him a hug, squishing her face against the jacket then quickly brushing off the pale concealer cheek print.

“Just how much espresso have you had?” Tony asked, patting her gently on the back as she hugged him. “You’re more like a hummingbird than a wasp. And what does ‘highlight the positives in my physique’ mean? What are the negatives?”

Ignoring the final question, Jan said, “Oh, just a couple of shots. It’s pumpkin spice latte season Tony! I can’t not get a pumpkin spice latte! It makes a mockery of the entire season!”

“You’re nervous,” Tony said, a knowing smile playing across his lips.

“Of course I am!” Jan said, all too loudly. She winced at the volume of her voice and bit down on her lower lip. When she spoke again, it was in a near whisper. “I’ve never met any royalty before and I’m afraid she won’t like me and what am I supposed to say to a queen and what if she doesn’t think I’m right for Thor--”

“She’s not going to think that, and you know what? You’re going to do great,” said Tony as he patted her on the shoulder. “You know how I know? You’re Janet-fucking-Van-Dyne, that’s how.”

“Yeah!” Janet steeled herself, pushing back her shoulders and standing as tall as she could manage with her diminutive stature.

As Janet and Tony talked, Thor came to stand next to Loki, giving him an amiable smile. “It has been some time since I last saw our mother.”

“Two years, four months, and twenty-three days,” Loki replied, staring blankly at the gate in front of them.

“Brother?”

“I have been exiled for two years, four months, and twenty-three days.” Loki shot him a glare that could curdle milk. “You saw our mother six months ago.”

“I didn’t mean to compare--”

“No. Of course not.” Loki clenched his teeth.

“Come now! This is a day for celebration! Our mother comes to this place that I have grown to see as a second home! Are you not pleased?” Thor cocked his head to the side, looking for all the world like a confused dog.

“I am pleased,” Loki replied flatly, grinding his teeth so hard that if he were not Asgardian he would be in danger of chipping one.

“Good! Friend Tony has already reserved a table for us at what he calls ‘the best restaurant in New York’ so once she has seen the Academy we will feast like Asgardians!”

“You are severely overestimating the amount of food you’ll get at the kind of restaurant Anthony has reserved.” It occurred to him then that he hadn’t heard anything from Tony about reserving a table at a restaurant. It was obviously something he had done on his own, without consulting Loki on what his mother liked or where _he_ would like to eat. “Excuse me, brother.” Without waiting for Thor to release him from the conversation, he turned sharply on his heel and crossed the short distance to where Tony and Janet were talking.

“Hey Loki, I was asking Janet and we should probably be holding hands. Don’t you think we should be holding hands?” He lowered his voice so as not to be heard by Thor, who was standing a short distance from them looking puzzled. “You know, to make it believable?”

“You should definitely hold hands,” Janet agreed with a decisive nod. “Just kinda stand close to one another and loosely hold hands. Shows you’re into one another enough that you felt compelled to touch.”

“Have you been reading Kamala’s fanfiction again?” asked Loki wearily, giving up on questioning Tony about dinner plans. Brunhilde took that moment to shift from his left shoulder to his right, winding her way around his neck and giving him a sandpaper kiss on the cheek once she settled again.

“Yes, but that’s besides the point.” Janet smoothed out her dress again, her hands shaking slightly as she did. “You guys want her to believe you’re together, so at least _look_ like you’re affectionate.”

Tony shrugged. “You’ve never steered me wrong yet, Jan.”

“I can’t believe I’m saying this,” Loki said as he lifted a hand to cover his face in a gesture that screamed exhaustion, “but this is an unnecessary amount of trickery.” Tony and Jan both slowly began to stare at Loki, their faces masks of confusion and mild concern. Loki dropped his hand to his side, his expression exasperated. “My letters have done the difficult work, all that’s necessary is for you two to play along. Especially you,” said Loki as he pointed to Tony with his staff.

Tony regarded Loki long enough that Loki turned away, half-seconds before he flushed from the pointed, silent attention. “Nah.” Tony grinned when Loki turned back. “I think we should definitely hold hands.”

“Fine.” Loki removed his left hand from his jacket pocket and grabbed Tony’s right, lacing their fingers together. The deep heaviness in his chest returned immediately, mixing with the butterflies already flapping around in his stomach at the prospect of finally seeing his mother again. It was an uncomfortable sensation, like someone had his heart in their grasp, squeezing out the secrets. Loki loved his secrets.

“I meant when your mom actually arrives.” Tony glanced down at their hands, a nervous furrow in his brow. He made an attempt to unlace their fingers, but Loki squeezed his hand with more force than necessary.

“Too late. You’ve convinced me and I’m not letting go.” Loki planted the end of his staff into the ground after shifting closer to Tony.

“Aww, you two are so cute.” From a pocket in her dress, Jan pulled out her cell phone and took a quick shot of them standing together.

“If that ends up on Facebook I _will_ leave the academy forever,” Loki warned as she glanced at her phone to see how it came out. Seconds later, Tony’s phone beeped from his pocket as the text she sent him with the picture arrived.

“You two probably should have taken some photos together, actually,” Janet said as she checked the time on her phone. Frigga was set to arrive in moments. “What kind of couple doesn’t have cute pictures together?”

“Now my beloved,” Thor began as he joined them, “my brother has always valued his privacy over all else, except for mischief.” Thor reached out and gave Brunhilde a scratch on the neck which she reluctantly accepted, a quiet purr rising from her chest. “If my brother desires no photographs of himself, then I do not see how they are necessary.”

“You’re soooo right,” Janet said as she hooked her arm around Thor’s waiting elbow. “I can’t believe I was so inconsiderate. Loki, do you want me to delete the picture I just took?”

With a put-upon glare, Loki shook his head no.

That was when the door to the foyer opened.

Two rows of guards in golden armor, closed helms hiding their features, marched from the foyer to the biforst in perfect formation, each step that pounded the sidewalk resonating through the grounds. The guards carried long spears with razor tips and each one marched with the sort of precision that only comes from a lifetime of disciplined training. Once twelve guards stood on either side of the sidewalk, Frigga stepped out of the foyer.

She was resplendent in gold and pale blue, her chin high, the silver of her hair tumbling down her shoulders over a golden shawl. She wore an open helm like Loki, large wings framing her regal face. Her gown was surprisingly simple, blue and shimmering, with a train of lace as fine as spider’s silk. It brushed the floor as she walked towards them, her step so light that she seemed to glide rather than walk. Frigga raised her hand and the guards stood aside, in unison, falling to their knees with the tip of their spears reaching into the sky. With the welcoming smile that only a mother could muster, Frigga approached her children.

The knot that had wound its way around Loki’s stomach finally released, and with that relief tears came to his eyes. The glamour spell still held though, and he greeted his mother without wiping away the tears that threatened to fall. Releasing Tony’s hand, as though forgetting about the entire conversation _vis a vis_ hand holding, Loki met his mother halfway to the group and threw his arms around her, bending slightly to negate the differences in their height.

“Oh, Loki,” she said gently, her voice like an oasis in the desert for him. For the barest moment he forgot it all, the Academy, the letters, everything. He was a child again and his mother was there and everything would be fine forever. She wrapped one arm around his waist and used the other to gently cup the back of his head as she tugged him closer. “My dearest Loki. You have no idea how much I’ve missed you,” she whispered. From Loki’s shoulder, Brunhilde carefully stepped onto Frigga’s, purring audibly as she curled her way around her neck just as she did so often with Loki.

Tony, Janet, and Thor watched the reunion in silence, Janet still shaking with nervous energy as she clung to Thor. At the sound of a footfall, Loki flicked his gaze to Tony, noting the sweat on his brow and the anxious swallow as he haltingly stepped forward. Loki knew Tony had met with heads of state and of industry without a single sweaty palm, but as he stood a few steps back from where Loki hugged Frigga, Loki watched as he rubbed both hands on the sides of his trousers. As Frigga’s grip began to release, Loki snapped his attention back to her, giving her a squeeze as if to say he wasn’t ready to let her go. As Thor came forward, Frigga released Loki from her grasp. He held on for a second longer yet before lifting Brunhilde off of his mother’s shoulder and cradling her in his arms like an infant.

Frigga smiled as she turned towards Thor and Janet. Janet squeezed Thor’s hand as hard as she could as Frigga approached. “My dear Thor,” she began, “how well you look. Midgard does suit you, doesn’t it?”

With an uncharacteristically gentle expression, Thor gave his mother a one-armed hug, not releasing Janet’s shaking hand. “Aye, mother. Nothing can compare to the splendor of Asgard, but I have come to regard Midgard as a second home. There are so many good things here, mother. The world is beautiful and the company, ah, the company has no equal.”

“That’s the most articulate I’ve heard the oaf in decades,” Loki muttered under his breath, only loud enough for Tony to hear him.

Tony nudged him with his elbow. “Maybe not in front of him and your mom,” he hissed.

Loki raised both brows as the hint of a grin crossed his lips. “I assure you that my mother is aware of my feelings for my brother.” Despite the snark in his voice, there was aura of something Tony rarely felt from Loki--joy. For the barest moment it was as if all the anger, all the bitterness had melted off of him, and he was perhaps what he would have always been if the quiet rage had never set in.

“Yeah, but. Maybe just let it be a happy reunion. You said you hadn’t seen her in years.” He whispered, leaning closer to Loki so as not to be heard. Whether or not he was heard, Frigga was now regarding Tony. With a gulp, Tony steeled his shoulders as he greeted her.

“Your majesty,” Tony said with soft reverence. It was impossible to not be awed by the sheer force of her presence, by her iron spine and the tenderness exuding from her that nearly masked the fierce quickness in her eyes. Despite Tony knowing that Loki was adopted, so to speak, that cleverness in her eyes reminded him of Loki. “I am pleased to meet y--no uh. I am humbled by your presence,” he said, sounding to Loki a little rehearsed, “and I welcome you to Avengers Academy.”

“No need to be formal with me,” Frigga said as she released Loki from her grasp.“You must be Anthony Stark.” Her smile was beatific as she spoke. “I have heard so many wonderful things about you.”

“You have? I mean, that’s great,” he said, his eyes flicking towards Loki briefly. “I uh. It’s uh.” The sweat on his forehead began to drip. Loki’s gaze fell upon him again, on the faint tremor of his hand as he began to raise it, as if to shake hers, before snapping it down to his side again awkwardly.

Still clinging to Thor’s hand, Janet took a step forward. “Your majesty,” she said and gave her a one-handed curtsy. “I’m so pleased to meet you my name is Janet and I own Van Dyne’s Clothing and create all of the designs myself and I’ve got this super cool power where I can shrink down and zap people with energy and...” The nervous quiver in Janet’s voice was almost hidden by the speed with which she spoke. Thor reassuringly rubbed her back with one hand as Frigga reached out and patted her gently on the shoulder.

“That all sounds wonderful. I’m eager to see your clothing store and your dormitory, but please.” She gave Janet’s shoulder a little squeeze. “You needn’t be so nervous. What is it that Midgardians like to say? Ah! Don’t be afraid. I won’t bite,” Frigga said with the smallest of grins, a light of gentle teasing in her eyes that was somewhat negated by the sight of the Asgardian royal guard, still kneeling as they waited for her word.  Frigga broke away from the group to regard them.

“You may leave,” she said, addressing the guards. The tone of her voice was no longer that of the gentle mother, but that of a tremendous force of power. She did not raise her voice, nor did she change her straight posture, but the shift in her demeanor was palpable. “Tell my husband that I can take care of myself.” Now her voice was stern and her presence tremendous as every guard snapped to their feet instantly and pounded the base of their spears against the concrete. “And that if he wishes to argue with me on that point he is welcome to find me here.”

From beside Tony, Loki clenched his jaw at the words “my husband.”

“Welcome to Avengers Academy your majesty.” The voice that came from behind Thor and Janet was as familiar as it was unexpected. Janet and Thor parted as the imposing figure of Nick Fury, still all in black and a trenchcoat despite the warm day, passed between the two of them, offering Frigga a nod that she returned. “I take it your trip went well?” Fury asked, in a voice that was just jovial enough to denote that he was joking. When he spoke again, his tone had shifted back to the no-nonsense sternness that everyone but Frigga was familiar with. “There has been a tour arranged for you. Once you’re finished with introductions and reunions, Miss Hill will take you through campus.” Maria Hill, in full S.H.I.E.L.D. gear, with her hair tied in a tight bun, nodded to Frigga, though her nod was nowhere near as self-assured as Fury’s.

“In just a moment,” Frigga said, her voice both gentle and imposing. She addressed Tony. “Once this little tour is over I would love to see your tower,” she said. “I’ve heard more about it than any other place on campus, so I’m certain it’s wondrous.”

Tony looked at Loki, head cocked slightly to the side, mouth open as if to say something, but nothing came. He turned quickly back to Frigga. “Sure! My home is open to any and all Asgardians, _especially_ Asgardian queens.”

“Well, it looks like everything is in order here.” Nick Fury spoke again, his tone of voice almost entirely masking the air of impatience that surrounded him at all times. “But I’ll keep my eye on things just in case,” he said, pointing to his eyepatch.

Frigga laughed politely, the laugh of someone who had heard a joke a thousand times. And she had, Loki knew Odin made that joke every chance he got, and a momentary disgust roiled in Loki’s stomach. “Of course, Nicolas. I have every faith in you and your protégé. In fact,” she said as she turned to Maria, “Miss Hill whenever you’re ready I would love to start.”

Out of force of habit, Maria’s hand flew to her forehead in a practiced military salute, though her demeanor was far less composed as usual. “O-of course your majesty.”

“Thank you again Nico--” Frigga began, but when she turned from Maria to speak to Fury he was already gone.

* * *

 

Dutifully, Maria Hill led the five of them around campus, stopping at various places to rattle off a rehearsed explanation of what each building was for. First they stopped at the combat arena, as it was closest to the bifrost’s foyer.

“We have many students with unique abilities, and many of them are formidable in combat. However, to remain formidable, we have a strict regimen of combat training that all students must abide by.” Maria stood ramrod straight, her hands clasped behind her back as Frigga and the others looked at the open-air combat arena.

A large crowd was gathered to watch the current fight. Kamala Khan was fighting with Sam Wilson. He soared above her in the Falcon suit while she, with her arms stretched and her fists huge, tried to grab him out of the air. She managed to land a hit and the crowd exploded in applause and shouts as Sam spun wildly in the air, catching himself before he plummeted to the ground.

“I’ve always believed that one should learn how to defend themselves,” Frigga said as she watched Sam swoop down and make an attempt to pick Kamala up. She rolled out of the way, eliciting another round of cheers from the crowd. “It appears the students are being trained well.”

“They certainly are, your majesty. Please follow me.”

Next, they passed Club A, where music could be heard thumping through the walls. A few students sat outside at tables placed near the brick facade of the building, drinking brightly brightly colored liquid through straws. Deep into a giggling conversation, they didn’t notice Frigga or her entourage.

“This is where Thor and I had our first date,” Janet chimed in. “We danced until like, 3 when they closed up. It was totally awesome!” Janet, who had been relaxing by degrees as they toured the campus, wrapped one arm around Thor’s waist and gave him a squeeze as they stood next to Frigga. “Even with all the noise it was super romantic. Thor literally swept me off of my feet,” she said with a huge smile. Thor in turn threw his arm around her waist and lifted her off of her feet by a couple of inches.

“Aye, t’was a night I shall never forget,” Thor said, beaming, “and a reminder of why I love Midgard.”

While Frigga looked at Thor and Jan, Loki was unable to suppress an eye roll. While he was out of Frigga’s line of sight, he wasn’t out of Tony’s, and Tony elbowed him sharply in the ribs, giving him a pointed glare when Loki looked at him.

“And what of you two?” Frigga asked, turning her attention to Loki and Tony just in time for Loki to put on a mask of unperturbed calm. “What ignited the spark of the wonderful relationship Loki has told me about?”

“Ah--” Tony opened his mouth to speak, a blind panic rising in his gut as the flush rose higher on his cheeks. But before he could think of an answer, Loki spoke.

“Study hall,” Loki said without missing a beat. Maria Hill flagged them on, and Loki pointed across campus towards the Timeless Archives, the extra-dimensional library donated to the campus by Odin. “I was under the threat of disciplinary action if I did not improve my scores in chemistry. I asked Anthony to tutor me, and it was less horrible than I imagined it would be.” Realizing he hadn’t described a date at all, Loki continued. “And, well. By the third or fourth time we met up, I think we both realized we were making excuses to see one another.”

“Yeah!” The flush left Tony’s face as he eagerly agreed, wearing an expression that only Loki knew was relieved. On Frigga’s other side, Jan lifted her hand to her heart and held it there for a second as she watched Loki speak, her expression was one of a person figuring something out, perhaps for the first time. “I’m a genius...” he began, and Loki bit his tongue, holding back a quip about how Tony did love to remind people of that. “But I can be a little thick-headed sometimes,” Tony said, pretending to knock on his head with his knuckles. “So when I thought about the fact that I was canceling plans to see him...” Tony offered Frigga a sheepish shrug. Even Loki’s glamour illusion couldn’t hide the split-second of surprise that crossed his face at the new information.

“You know, I’m not at all surprised,” Frigga said, her tender gaze falling on Loki. “Loki has always been...indirect. I would have wondered what Midgard had done to change my child if you said he’d simply asked you out.”

Maria cleared her throat, clearly working on some kind of internal schedule that they weren’t privy to. One that didn’t allow for briefly stopping to chat. With the barest expression of annoyance which was quickly masked by unflappable calm, Frigga nodded politely in Maria’s direction and began to follow her.

Loki hung back as Frigga walked, grabbing Tony’s collar to keep him from following her. “Did you really cancel plans to tutor me?” Loki asked in a low whisper. In his chest, there was a twinge of something he rarely felt--guilt.

“Well, yeah, and let go of my jacket.”

“Why?”

“Because you’re going to wrinkle it.” The twitch in Loki’s eyelid made Tony realize he’d answered the wrong question. “I thought you really needed help,” Tony replied with a shrug.

“Why, Anthony, so charmingly naive,” Loki murmured, swallowing the guilt, unimpressed by the elbow Tony jammed into his ribs yet again. “I almost feel guilty about the whole ‘trying to get you into trouble’ thing.”

“Jerk,” Tony said, but if he meant it there wasn’t nearly enough force behind it to make it obvious. “Helping. You. Out,” Tony reminded him, and Loki used the hand not holding his staff to his shoulder to flash the “okay” sign at him.

* * *

 

The tour lasted far longer than anyone other than Maria Hill could have expected, and by the time they had circled back to the foyer, an hour and a half had passed. They hadn’t even explored the entire campus. Maria, likely on Fury’s orders, had skipped over Van Dyne’s and Stark Tower, deferring that responsibility to Janet and Tony respectively.

“Well, Miss Hill, thank you for that lovely, comprehensive tour,” Frigga said. “I would never have found my way around the campus without your expert instructions.” Her smile and rapt attention contrasted to the faces of Loki and the rest, none of whom were good at hiding the fact that the tour had been tedium itself. Maria blushed at Frigga’s words, but the terse nod that she offered the others suggested that, perhaps under the S.H.I.E.L.D. training, she too thought it had been tedious.

“You’re welcome your majesty. If you need anything during your stay, remember that S.H.I.E.L.D. is ready to provide it,” Maria responded, raising her hand again as if to salute, but thinking better of it and bowing instead.

A few feet behind Frigga, the pair of couples stood talking quietly.

“...so that’s why I think she should see the tower first,” said Janet as she fiddled with the bangle bracelets on her wrists. “If she takes a while looking at your tower, I can pick out a range of clothing that I think she’ll like based on what she’s wearing. I’ve got that gown from last season--”

“Maria took us to all of the places I wished to visit,” Thor said as he rubbed Janet’s shoulder with one meaty hand. “But perhaps mother would like to see us compete in the combat arena?” Thor addressed Loki, who gave him a pained glance in return. “Not you and I! Perhaps Banner would be amenable to displaying his strength in front of the All-mother.” Thor grinned. “Of course, I’m stronger, but it would still be a spectacle. Loki! You could...perhaps...” Thor’s brows furrowed as he thought. A solid minute passed as Loki tapped his foot and Frigga continued to speak with Maria. “Ah-ha! You could spar with Tony!”

“Absolutely not,” Loki said without missing a beat.

In unison, Tony said, “Yeah, I don’t think so. Our fighting styles are different,” he explained. “The suits are built for brute force and you’re more of a uh...”

“Anthony, I could throw you across this campus if I so desired, so don’t think I couldn’t hold up against one of your suits if I wanted to,” Loki said, lifting his nose, his tone mildly offended.

In a careful tone, Tony replied, “I kinda doubt that, no offense.”

“My brother speaks the truth!” Thor said, puffing up his chest a little, the--perhaps misplaced--pride in his brother written on his face. “Compared to an Asgardian _warrior_ my brother may not be strong--”

“Thank you for the ringing endorsement,” Loki said with a sneer, busying himself with scratching Brunhilde’s chin as she treaded in his fur collar.

“--but on Midgard he could best most humans.”

“He could,” came a voice from behind them, and they turned to see Frigga quietly watching the conversation. “Oh, Thor. Two thousand years and still bickering about who’s stronger.” She put her hand over her heart and gently shook her head. With a smile she gave them each another hug, Loki clinging just as desperately as before. “Just like when you were children. Whatever shall I do with you two?”

A shock of anger burst in Loki’s chest and it took all of his strength to not say that the only thing she should do is bring him back to Asgard, but he tamped the fury down. It was Odin, after all, who had banished him. “Who knows?” he asked, spreading his arms in a noncommittal gesture, releasing the staff--which floated at his side, spinning--just long enough to do so. For the moment, Asgard didn’t matter. His mother was there, on Midgard, making it a wonderful place to be.

“If it’s alright with you, your majesty, I’d like to take you to see my tower first,” Tony said in an attempt to diffuse the tension building between Loki and Thor. “There’s really a lot to see.”

“That sounds lovely, Anthony,” Frigga said, absently adjusting her shawl. “Thor, Janet, would that be alright with you?”

Throwing Tony an appreciative glance, Janet offered Frigga double thumbs up as a response. “Take your time. It’ll be better if you come after we close anyway--you can have the whole store to yourself.” By now, Janet was her bubbly, assertive self again, and Thor didn’t even bother trying to get a word in edgewise whether or not he wanted to disagree. With another hug for her son and one for Jan for good measure, Frigga bid them goodbye and began to follow Tony and Loki to Stark Tower.

Waiting until Thor and Janet were out of earshot, Frigga turned to Tony and said, “I’ve been looking forward to seeing this tower most of all. Loki has told me so much of your wondrous accomplishments in Midgardian technology.”

* * *

 

The glass doors to the ground floor showroom slid open to allow Tony, Loki, and Frigga to enter. As soon as they closed, Brunhilde hopped off of Loki’s shoulder, sliding slightly on the slick floor, and zoomed off into a side room, disappearing in an instant.

“Good afternoon your majesty, Loki, Master Tony.” The voice of J.A.R.V.I.S. came from hidden speakers in the ceiling, and Frigga glanced up, curiously trying to find the source of the voice.

“That’s my A.I.,” Tony said with an unmistakable thread of pride in his voice. “Artificial Intelligence. A self-sufficient ever-evolving _thinking_ program.”

J.A.R.V.I.S. chimed in, “I am capable of controlling every room in this tower, every one of Master Tony’s suits, and with the right equipment I can even make you a perfect martini.” If an A.I. could smile, there would be a touch of self-satisfied smile in J.A.R.V.I.S.’ voice at his joke.

“And you’re alive?” Frigga asked in curious wonder.

“Why, that depends on what you consider to be alive, your majesty,” J.A.R.V.I.S. replied. “I lack a physical body, so if that is a requirement for being alive then, no, I should say that I am not alive in that sense. However, I am as capable of complex, self-aware thought, just the same as anyone in this room, so if that fits your criteria of being alive, then I am very much alive.”

“So you’ve created, perhaps, a simulacrum of life?” Frigga asked Tony.

“That assessment is certainly not wrong,” J.A.R.V.I.S. replied.

“Interesting,” Frigga said, turning her gaze away from the ceiling where she had still been searching for the source of the voice. “A Midgardian invention such as this surely proves that Asgard underestimates what Midgardians are capable of.”

Tony flushed a little and nervously ran his hand through his hair, mussing it up enough that the illusion of casual, effortless perfection was lost. “I. Well. Uh.” He stumbled over his words while trying to process both the praise and the implication that Asgardians thought humans were incapable of impressive feats. “Thank you, your majesty,” he said finally. “When it comes to whether J.A.R.V.I.S. is alive, well.” he paused, rubbing his hand over the light scruff on his chin. “Though J.A.R.V.I.S. clearly thinks differently, I’m not entirely sure I’d say I’ve created anything resembling life, lifelike as he may be to someone who isn’t familiar with how I made him. Whether or not he’s alive, J.A.R.V.I.S. here is the product of thousands of hours of programming and testing and I’d trust him with my life. I mean, I do trust him with my life pretty regularly since he’s a part of my suits.”

“I expect there are few on Midgard who could have created such a thing. There are Asgardian scholars and technological wizards who have the capability of breathing life into a creation in many ways, and I’m sure many of them would be interested to know how you’ve accomplished this.” Frigga said with genuine praise in her voice. From her side Loki watched, caught between relief that Frigga found Tony even the smallest bit interesting, and an odd sensation of pride at how impressed she was.

Frigga continued, “There is so much of Midgard that is foreign to Asgardians. We stay too isolated in our golden city and forget what wonders exist in the other realms.” Spinning slowly, Frigga examined the shining showroom, her gaze falling on a row of Iron Man suits in huge display cases. “And these are the suits I’ve heard so much about,” she said as she approached the first in a line of increasingly sleek, gleaming, and technologically advanced suits. The suit before her, despite looking like a pile of scrap metal to Loki, was by far the most impressive, as Tony was quick to explain.

“Yeah,” said Tony, beaming with pride. “This is the Mark I,” he said as he came to stand beside her, gesturing to the heavy, dull iron suit with it’s solid, one piece helmet and thick barrel-chested torso. “This one got me out of the worst situation I’ve ever been in. I built it in a cave in Afghanistan and...” he trailed off, and Loki could tell by the twitch in his cheek that the kidnapping incident that had left him with the arc reactor in his chest was too much for him to talk about with a stranger--even a royal one. “It saved my life,” he finished with a practiced smile. In his element, he moved to another suit several down the line and gave her a more detailed explanation of the features from flight to J.A.R.V.I.S. integration that predicted his movements seconds before they happened to keep him from doing anything his body couldn’t handle.

Frigga listened with measured intent, her eyes not moving from the suits as he spoke. “We have a, shall we say, defense mechanism in the form of animated armor in Asgard. It is called the Destroyer, quite appropriately for what it has been used for in the past,” she added as an aside. “It is able to be used either autonomously or with the aid of someone who possesses it through a process that transfers consciousness from one’s body to the machine.”

“These suits can work autonomously too,” Tony added quickly, as if eager to prove that his designs could stand up to Asgardian technology. “It’s a bit of a finicky process at this point, but the more I’m able to improve them, the more then can do under J.A.R.V.I.S’s command alone.

“Impressive,” Frigga said as she continued to look them over, her clever gaze darting from suit to suit. Loki stood silent at her side as Tony continued to talk, content enough just to be near her.

“Thank you, your majesty,” he said, all traces of anxiety erased now that he’d gotten the opportunity to rest on his favorite topic. “But these are all retired. If you have the time, I would love to show you a demonstration of the Mark IX. So far it’s been in the testing stages, so you two will be the first people to see it in action.” Tony’s eyes gleamed at the chance to show off his tech, and while Loki was curious to see what Tony had spent so many sleepless nights working on, he knew if Tony got the chance he might keep them there for hours.

“Perhaps it would be bes--” But Loki was cut off mid-sentence.

“I would love to see a demonstration,” Frigga interjected and Loki said no more. There were some things, though precious few, he could not do, and argue with his mother was one of them.

* * *

 

In the workshop Tony stood before Frigga and Loki in the new Mark IX suit. It was a bit taller than the others--Loki wondered if that was out of vanity or necessity--with overlapping metal plates on the arms, legs, and lower torso. The middle of the chest sported the same circular arc reactor as was embedded in Tony’s own chest, glowing blue as soon as the suit’s systems flared to life. The suit, like all the rest excluding the Mark I, was dark red and gold, and it shone in the bright fluorescents of Tony’s lab. Watching them from behind the gold mask Tony smiled as he engaged the rocket thrusters to life himself off the ground. “The Mark IX has superior flight stabilization routines compared to the earlier models,” Tony said, his voice slightly distorted from the microphone inside the suit. He rose further off the floor before shooting across the room at tremendous speed, taking a hard turn at the corner wall, and returning in a matter of seconds. “The Mark VIII would have had a lot more trouble with that turn,” he said.

“Marvelous,” Frigga said under her breath as Tony took another series of rapid twists and turns. With a word to J.A.R.V.I.S. a target appeared from the ceiling and he gave them a demonstration of the repulsor blasts from the hands and an omnibeam from the chest. “Why, the last time I was in Midgard--”

“They were still building temples for us with wood walls and thatched roofs,” Loki finished.

“I was going to say that technology was not nearly so advanced,” Frigga said, glancing sidelong at Loki before letting out the softest of wistful sighs. “I do so miss the temples though.”

“Prayers were nice,” Loki said in agreement as Tony, in a grand finale, stepped out of the suit while its component parts exploded from his body and hovered in the air behind him. The suit then reassembled itself and flew off to stand statue-still on the platform surrounded by robotic arms that it had been standing on when they entered the workshop.

Tony opened his mouth to speak and was interrupted by a clang as Brunhilde dropped down from one of the tallest shelves with a small metal object in her mouth. “How did she even get in here?” Tony asked as he went to try to retrieve the cat. Brunhilde instead darted away from him and dove between Frigga’s legs to hide under her dress. Tony, who had started after her, stopped dead in his tracks with an awkward laugh. “She knows how to hide when she’s in trouble,” he said, almost fondly, and from Frigga’s side Loki raised an eyebrow almost imperceptibly.

“Yes, she was never to be found when something went missing or something valuable was broken. Sometimes absence tells us more than presence and after a few months of that I knew exactly with whom she belonged.” Frigga lifted her skirt to her ankles as she swooped down to scoop Brunhilde up. Once she was squirming in her arms, Frigga plucked the metal bolt from her mouth and handed it to Tony before passing Brunhilde to Loki where she pawed at his chest, her little claws kneading into his coat. “This has been thoroughly eye-opening, Anthony, and I thank you for giving me the opportunity to be awakened to the complexities of Midgardian technology. I would, however, also like to see where you live, if you are amenable to that.”

Tony cast a quick nervous glance at Loki, less confident now that he was being taken away from his work. “Yeah, of course, we can go up right now.” Leading them out of the lab Tony took them to the elevator where J.A.R.V.I.S. automatically lifted them to the fourth floor.

* * *

 

The day prior to Frigga’s arrival Tony had had the living area cleaned from top to bottom, and when the doors to the elevator opened the scene was as shiny and bright as the lab. Since the elevator opened first to the kitchen Loki eagerly led his mother within, showing her the restaurant-quality ovens and stovetops, detailing the sort of meals he had been able to create. As he spoke, Loki bent to place Brunhilde on the floor where she skittered off in the direction of Tony’s bedroom.

“He’s a great cook,” Tony piped in. “We have something different for breakfast every day. I didn’t even know you could do so many things with eggs.” Tony grinned, catching Loki’s eyes, proud of himself for his quick thinking. There was no embellishment in Tony’s voice and Loki offered him a half-genuine smile, quite pleased with his contribution.

“Ah, yes.” Frigga smiled warmly at Loki. “He was always in the kitchen as a child.” She took one of Loki’s hands between hers and squeezed gently. “It does me good to know that you are able to pursue your interests on Midgard.”

“Well, some,” Loki said with a mild shrug. “Come, let me show you to my room.”

* * *

 

In Loki’s room Frigga sat on the edge of the bed examining the surroundings. “This is quite lovely,” she said after a time, stroking the bedspread as she knowingly fixed her eyes on the painting of Fenrir and Sköll.

“It is nothing compared to Asgard,” Loki was quick to say, but as his mother caught his eye he continued. “But it is comfortable and quiet--a welcome respite from the dorms, at any rate.” He sat beside her and took her hand. “But you understand that _nothing_ could compare to Asgard.”

“I know, darling,” Frigga said softly, and after releasing Loki’s hand she wrapped him in a one-armed hug, resting her head against his when he leaned it onto her shoulder. “I am so glad to have a moment alone with you. There’s something I need to tell you.”

Alarm crossed Loki’s face as he turned to her. “Is something wrong?” he asked hesitantly. The thought that perhaps she had come just to break bad news in person crossed his mind and steeled himself for whatever was to come. A tiny voice in the back of his head, however, did suggest that perhaps something was wrong with Odin, that he had fallen into Odinsleep or, better yet, been wounded or killed in one of his asinine conquests. As much as the prospect warmed his heart, it seemed unlikely.

“As you know,” she began. “I will only be staying for two days. However, this is not because duty calls me back to Asgard so soon.” Loki’s brow furrowed in confusion. He had been sure that the length of her visit was due to something queenly. “This shall be a brief visit because I intend to take you, Thor, Janet, and Anthony back to Asgard with me when I return.”

A sunburst of joy bloomed in the center of Loki’s chest as happy tears came to his eyes. He regretted, for an instant, having dropped the glamor spell when he had become sure he wouldn’t cry in front of his mother, as now she saw the wetness in his eyes as he blinked tears away.

“I’m going home,” he said in a whisper, searching Frigga’s face to make sure this wasn’t some kind of trick--not that he believed that she would do such a thing, but he didn’t put it past the universe to play that kind of cosmic joke on him. “You’re taking me home.” He threw his arms around her and buried his face into her neck, then immediately pushed off, holding her shoulders in either hand, searching her face. “But what of Odin?”

“Odin has little say in what I wish to do with my children,” she said firmly, but her face was soft, almost sad. “However, when I say I intend to bring you back to Asgard I do not mean for good. After all, Anthony and Janet will need to return to Midgard, as will you and Thor.”

“You can’t mean this,” Loki said, the sunburst growing cold as he watched her gentle smile fade just a little. There was that cosmic joke he had expected. “You can’t. You can’t take me back to Asgard for a moment and send me back here.” The happy tears that had just come to his eyes were replaced by angry ones that streamed down his cheeks unhindered. “You can’t!”

“Loki, darling,” Frigga said soothingly, but Loki was on his feet, pacing in tight circles like a caged animal. He raised his hands to either side of his head, as if to grab his hair to tear it out, but dropped them at his side, fists clenched.

“You can’t leave me here!” he shouted, balling his fists tighter until his knuckles went white. “You can’t take me back for what, days, weeks, and then send me back to this helhole! I do not deserve this! I have done my penance!” Tears flowed freely now as Frigga stood and withdrew a delicately embroidered handkerchief from somewhere within the folds of her dress and used it to dab at his eyes, smudged black eyeliner staining the white cloth. “Mother, I don’t belong here!” He tried to twist away from her but she had taken his forearms in her hands and her grip was tight.

“Loki,” she said tenderly, releasing a forearm to cup his cheek, turning his face to hers and offering her handkerchief. “I know that Midgard will never be Asgard, but I do hope that you can find happiness here. You have shown me so much in your letters. You have more here on Midgard than I think you realize: you have friends, you have Anthony. Is it so terrible still?

Loki tried not to clench his teeth, furious that he had caught himself in his own lies yet again. He nodded silently, taking the handkerchief to wipe his eyes with it. “Yes I have...I have Anthony,” he said in a tone that he hoped sounded as though he was realizing that he had been foolish. “But it will never be the same.”

“Of course not, but everything changes. Even in Asgard,” she added before he could interject “In time things may change to the point where you will be able to return for good, but for now it must only be a visit.”

They were interrupted by the sound of muffled meowing as Brunhilde tore into the room, a mouthful of socks held tightly between her teeth as she hopped onto the bed. She dropped them, then pawed towards Loki, meowing until he scooped her up. Loki held her with her paws on his shoulder, stroking his back as she groomed his cheek. Tony followed close after, picking up his socks from where she’d dropped them.

  
“She got into my sock drawer again,” Tony said. “I don’t even know how she manages that; I don’t leave it open.”

“She is a very clever girl,” Loki said and kissed the top of her fuzzy head.

“That she is,” Frigga said knowingly as calm came over Loki when Brunhilde was in his arms. “Perhaps we should finish the tour soon. I would like to see Janet’s clothing store and I have some important news to share with all of you.”

“We’d better get going then,” said Tony. “There’s a lot to see, and I’m very curious now that you said you have news.”

“Oh, I think you’ll like it,” Frigga said with a smile.

 


	9. Chapter 9

Tony was uncharacteristically quiet during dinner. Though he managed to make himself seem lively and attentive to Frigga, Loki knew something was wrong the moment she announced the upcoming trip to Asgard. Thor had let out a hoot of joy that had startled diners from the table next to them to ones halfway across the restaurant and Jan’s jaw had dropped as she immediately began rambling about how excited she was to see Asgardian fashion. Tony reacted with polite, measured interest, but flicked his eyes across the table at Loki, frustration burning within them.

Once they returned to Stark Tower, Tony waited until the elevator doors closed and Loki tried to make a beeline for his bedroom before opening his mouth. 

“I don’t like this at  _ all _ , Loki,” he said firmly, following him, his lips pressed into a thin line as he clenched his teeth. “This is already a huge favor on my part and you told me it would only be for a couple of days.” 

“How could I have known--” Loki began, but Tony jabbed his pointer finger into his chest, his brows furrowed darkly. Loki raised both hands in a mollifying gesture. 

“You should have mentioned that it was at least a possibility! I don’t have time to go galavanting off to Asgard! I have classes! I have work! I have a multinational, multibillion dollar company to run!” Exasperated, he let his arms drop to his sides. “And now I have to put it all aside because you couldn’t just tell your mom you lied.” 

“How could I have known?” Loki shouted. “Do you know the meaning of the word ‘exile’? Because it doesn’t mean ‘on vacation for a while’.” Loki’s eye twitched. “Do you think I like this, Anthony? Do you think I like the necessity of lying--” 

“You certainly do it a lot for someone who doesn’t.” 

“To my mother!” Loki finished, his eyes flashing darkly. “Do you think I like playing Odin’s little game of letting me return for two weeks just to dump me back in Midgard?” 

“Finals are coming up,” said Tony with exasperation. 

“You have a Ph.D. from M.I.T.,” Loki said, almost accusatory. “Why do you give a flying fuck about this horse and hound show?” 

“It’s dog and pony show. And it’s important to me because the Academy is important to me. I thought it was to you too. We founded this place for people like us. People with powers, people with talents. What kind of founder would I be if I didn’t follow along with my fellow students?” 

“Put that aside for a moment and listen to me. You are being given the opportunity of a lifetime. Nobody goes to the Asgardian royal palace but the gods and very few honored guests. There are no Midgardians alive who have had this experience and now you will be one of two. Consider it the most exclusive club you could possibly be a member of.” Tony opened his mouth to speak but Loki continued before he got the chance. “That trinket I gave you, the spying device, how much have you learned from it?” He offered a small smile, already sure he knew the answer.

“A lot,” Tony admitted. “But I don’t see what that has to do with anything.” 

“How can you profess to be a genius when you’re so bloody stupid sometimes?” Loki looked at the ceiling as if trying to look to some other god to give him the strength to deal with Tony. “Weapons, Tony. Asgardian weapons. Wouldn’t you like to build yourself a suit based on weapons forged by the dwarves of Nidavellir?”

Tony looked at him blankly. 

“Ugh!” Loki buried his face in his hands for a moment, then dragged his fingers down his cheeks. “The dwarves! The weaponsmiths to the gods! Tony you are not this stu--” 

“Just because I don’t know anything about Asgard doesn’t make me stupid. You said yourself humans don’t go there,” Tony said pointedly as they finally left the elevator behind, walking together into the living room where Loki dropped himself into one of the overstuffed leather armchairs. He waited until Tony sat opposite him before he began to speak again. 

“The dwarves of Nidavellir are the most talented weaponsmiths known to god or man,” he began, leaning forward with his fingers tented. This was, as Midgardians liked to say, his trump card. “They forged Mjolnir from living uru--which is a metal,” he clarified, “and as you know there is no weapon on Midgard that is its equal.” 

“It’s a hammer,” Tony said dubiously as he sat, leaning back in the chair as he eyed Loki suspiciously. 

“A hammer made from living metal that is not only superior in strength to all Midgardian metals but absorbs magic like a sponge. Why do you think Odin was able to enchant Mjolnir as strongly as he did? Sure, steel will enchant, but not the way uru will.” Tony was silent, thinking, and Loki leaned forward with his elbows on his knees. “Do you know what is made from uru, other than Mjolnir?” 

Interest had come to Tony’s eyes and Loki could see the calculations as they ran through his mind. Sure, Tony didn’t believe in magic, but Loki knew he found Mjolnir to be an intriguing puzzle. Loki stayed silent, waiting for the last possible moment to reel Tony in. Tony shifted in his chair, opened his mouth to speak, and Loki dropped his bomb. 

“The Destroyer.” 

Tony leaned towards Loki, almost imperceptibly, but Loki could see the spark of interest in his eyes grow to a full-fledged fire. 

“The Destroyer is one of the most powerful artifacts in Asgard,” Loki said, a warm flush of pleasure rising through him as it became evident that Tony was hooked. “Second only to Mjolnir and Gungnir--that’s Odin’s spear--it has been used to protect Asgard from enemies for millenia.” He continued, detailing the battles against the dark elves of Svartalfheim and the fire giants of Muspelheim, conveniently omitting the time he tried to use it to kill Thor so many centuries ago. After all, he was a changed god and such unpleasantness could stay hidden in the past where it belonged. Catlike, he stretched in the armchair as Brunhilde jumped onto the arm next to him and began grooming her face. He didn’t need to hear Tony’s answer to know that as soon as he snapped out of fantasizing about what kind of suit he could make out of uru he’d be going into his room to pack. 

“Aright,” said Tony after five solid, silent minutes where he had leaned with his elbows on his knees and pondered. “You can get me access to the Destroyer?” 

“Absolutely,” Loki lied. 

“Alright,” he said again, getting to his feet. Loki joined him, unfolding his long legs and giving Brunhilde a little scratch under her chin. “I hope it’s not going to be a problem if I bring the Mark IX. I’ll need its sensors to study anything without my workshop.” 

“Of course it won’t be a problem. I wouldn’t be surprised if the Asgardian court would like a demonstration,” Loki said knowingly, being truthful now that he had gotten what he wanted. “Asgardians love battle and I’m sure there will be some kind of sparring matches in the two weeks we’re there.” Tony nodded absently, deep in thought. 

Expecting Tony to go to his bedroom, Loki padded off to the kitchen and opened the freezer. He pulled out a pint of dark chocolate cherry ice cream and when he turned to get a spoon he nearly bumped into Tony, who had followed him closely. 

“Did you want some?” Loki pulled out two spoons, offering one to Tony. 

“This is going to be really hard, you know,” Tony said as he took a spoon. 

“We could put it in the microwave for a few seconds so it’s scoopable.” 

“Not the ice cream,” Tony said with a roll of his eyes. “Pretending to be your boyfriend for a whole two weeks.” 

“Ah.” Loki tapped the lid of the pint with his spoon, his stomach dropping a little. In the excitement and disappointment surrounding the upcoming trip, Loki had nearly forgotten his deal with Tony. “You’ve performed admirably all day; I can’t imagine it will be much more difficult than today has been.” 

Tony walked around him to pull two bowls out of the kitchen cabinet, handing them to Loki who put them on the counter as he opened the ice cream. “You’ve seen the way Thor and Janet are,” he began, waiting as Loki spooned ice cream into his bowl. “She clings to him and he won’t take his eyes off of her. Your mom has been here for less than eight hours and they’ve already kissed in front of her.” 

“Are you asking me to kiss you?” Loki asked from the counter where he had emptied half the pint into one bowl and was now working on the second. He glanced over his shoulder at Tony, curiously watching him. 

“No!” An alarmed look crossed Tony’s face, punctuated by high color that rose in his cheeks. “I’m just saying that it’s going to be really difficult to pull this off when Jan and Thor are all over one another and you and I can’t even decide whether or not to hold hands.” 

“I feel like you’re asking me to kiss you,” said Loki, turning to lean against the counter, a sparkle of amusement in his eyes at Tony’s growing discomfort. But there was something deep within him that roiled at the rejection and it left him feeling cold. His chest was tight and his appetite for ice cream had greatly diminished. Still, he handed Tony his bowl and picked up his own. 

“What if we have to?” Tony looked at his ice cream, his cheeks still flushed. 

“What? Why would we  _ have _ to? Have you been reading fanfiction? Nobody is going to demand that we prove we’re in a relationship.” Loki lifted a spoonful of ice cream to his mouth before frowning at it and replacing the spoon. He set the bowl on the counter and took the empty pint to the trash. “However...” he said slowly as he turned, a flame sputtering to life within him as the chance for mischief presented itself. “It wouldn’t do if you flinched away if I tried to touch you.” 

“You just said--” Tony protested as Loki stalked towards him from the garbage can. 

“I know, but you make a valid point,” Loki said, trying to sound as though he was acquiescing. “It would look very suspicious if we were stiff and awkward around one another, especially when I said we’d been in a relationship for six months.” And though he couldn’t bring himself to look Tony in the eyes for this one, instead fixing his gaze thoughtfully in the air, he added: “Honestly, if we were really in a relationship we’d be having sex already.” 

“You know what? Forget I said anything.” Loki glanced down at Tony as he spoke, noting the fun shade of crimson on his face and smiling. Now this, this was worth the lies, he thought to himself, ignoring the flickers of heat in his belly as he closed in on Tony further. 

“No, I don’t think I will.” 

Tony’s ass collided with the kitchen counter as he tried to back away and he swallowed hard as Loki loomed over him, now nearly inches away from him. Loki lifted his hand and cupped the side of Tony’s warm cheek, running his thumb along the curve of his chin, over the bristles from his immaculately kept goatee. As Loki leaned down, Tony let out a little startled noise, no more than a near-silent gasp, and though there was panic in his eyes he closed them, his long pretty lashes resting on his red cheeks. Loki hovered there, his gaze dropping from his eyes to his lips. They were parted. 

Loki snapped away from him as though he had been burned, because he had. That smoldering in his stomach and burst into a raging blaze and Loki had dropped his hand to his side and taken several steps backwards. Fleeing was high on his list of priorities, but he forced a laugh, making it sound as genuine as he could. 

“Really, Anthony? How gullible are you?” Loki crossed his arms over his slim chest, dissolving into a nasty chuckle as Tony’s eyes opened again. The betrayal in them stung. Upon realizing he had been tricked, Tony’s flush rose to his ears and he grabbed his bowl from where it sat on the counter before storming out of the room. 

Loki waited until the sound of Tony’s bedroom door slamming came to his ears before picking up his own bowl and shoving it into the freezer, spoon and all. “Well fuck that,” he murmured to himself. 

A pall of instantaneous regret fell over Loki as he stood in the kitchen staring at the freezer door. Brunhilde wound around his legs, meowing impatiently as he continued to not notice her, his awareness buried deep in his mind as he reran the events that occurred just seconds ago on repeat. Everything about that had gone wrong, from the initial tease, to the second where his eyes had lit on Tony’s lips, to the shocked betrayal on Tony’s face when Loki had begun to laugh. That had hurt. It wasn’t supposed to. 

Finally noticing Brunhilde at his feet he opened the fridge, pulled out a plate of finely diced raw rabbit and took the plastic wrap off before placing it on the floor in front of her. Without giving him another thought she began to devour and Loki passed her by as he headed towards his bedroom, trying to ignore the ache in his gut. 

By the time he got to his door he came to the conclusion that that ache wasn’t going to go away until he did something about it, and he rested his forehead against the closed door. 

“Sometimes I liked myself better when I didn’t have a conscience,” he muttered, and with a heavy sigh he headed towards Tony’s bedroom. 

Standing outside of his bedroom, Loki lifted his hand to knock before hesitating. Everything inside of him was muddled from that split-second when his gaze had fallen on Tony’s parted lips. They were pretty. They were soft, at least it seemed like they would be, and there was no denying--though he tried greatly--the desire to have followed through on that little joke. That wasn’t supposed to happen. Tricks were tricks and shouldn’t have a greater impact than varying levels of amusement. 

With a sigh he knocked on the door. For a while there was no answer and Loki wondered if Tony hadn’t managed to go down to the workshop while he had been lost in his own thoughts in the kitchen, but just when he was about to turn around and walk away Tony spoke. 

“What do you want?” 

“I want...” The words stuck in his throat and he had to force them, despising how unfamiliar they tasted on his tongue. “I want to apologize.”

Tony was silent again for a time before saying, “Well, that’s unexpected. Go ahead and come in.” 

Loki entered to find Tony sitting cross-legged on his bed, the ice cream bowl perched on one knee. The large, wall-mounted TV across from his bed was on some financial channel and he flicked it off as Loki stepped through the doorway. 

“I don’t like being made the butt of the joke,” Tony said before Loki had a chance to speak and Loki had to resist the urge to answer in a snarky manner, saying something about how Tony made himself such a good target. Diffusing situations did not come naturally, but Loki was at least occasionally able to tell when to keep his mouth shut. So he did. “But I can kiss you. It’s no big deal.” 

Whatever reaction Tony was expecting was probably not what happened to Loki in the instant he spoke. Though Tony continued to speak, Loki heard nothing because he was back in the kitchen, looming over Tony, his gaze hovering on parted pink lips before he bent to kiss him. With the force of an overactive imagination that had been cultivated over two thousand years, Loki could feel every minute sensation: the softness of Tony’s lips, the hitch in his breath when they met his own, and the warmth of his cheek in his hand. Unbidden, the memory of that woman on his balcony, her cheek against his back, came to him and though he tried to tamp it down there was a small but noisy part of him that wanted that intimacy. Just wanted to be touched again. It had been  _ so _ long. 

“I’ve done it before on the red carpet or at galas,” Tony continued, Loki only processing the words a half-minute after they were said, shaking himself out of his delirious mental roadtrip. He tried not to think about how much his heart sank into his gut at Tony’s words. “Paparazzi want pictures, tabloids want to write salacious headlines, you know the deal. Sometimes to keep other things out of the news you just kiss the woman you’re with and watch it show up on the front page of TMZ, pushing out news of stock prices dropping or whatever.” 

“Ah.” 

“I mean, you’re right though, nobody is going to force us to prove we’re in a relationship.” 

“Correct,” Loki said in agreement, firmly planted in the present now and able to slip back into his comfortable mask. “Besides, I can be a very private person in some regards and relationships are one of them. When your exes mysteriously tend to end up with your brother one learns to keep things quiet.”

“That happened more than once?” Tony asked, recalling the story of Lorelai. 

“Once would be enough, but yes. Three or four times.” Loki sneered. “It’s amazing how professed affection wanes when confronted with someone more  _ worthy _ .” Without really knowing why he was admitting this to Tony, he continued. “I suspect several got close to me just to get an introduction to him, so I have come to be rather discreet about my entanglements.” 

“Well, I’m not going to leave you for Thor,” Tony said so earnestly that Loki almost forgot the relationship was fake. 

Loki’s lips twitched into the smallest of smiles. “You’re not his type anyway.” 

“And he’s with Jan,” Tony added. Loki decided that it would be best not to tell Tony how that had rarely stopped Thor in the past. Instead he simply gave him an absent nod. 

“My mother believes my letters, and that is all that is necessary to keep up this farce. Odin’s thoughts on the matter are worthless, and Thor is already convinced we’re in love thanks to Janet.” Loki gave a shrug, thankful for the diversion from his imagination. “Likely nobody will even pay enough attention to us with Thor around. The golden boy returns,” he said darkly. 

“I don’t know about that. You said humans--Midgardians--never go to Asgard. Won’t Jan and I be so out of the ordinary that people will be watching us closely?” 

“Perhaps, though I do think Thor will take center stage. You’ll see when we’re there how the Asgardian public adores him.” The topic was beginning to set Loki’s teeth on edge. “Don’t you need to pack?”

“Yeah, I just need to finish up with a few things on the Mark IX and I can get it set up to go. Did you know I can fit it into a suitcase when it’s broken down?” he asked, beaming. “The only worry I have is that J.A.R.V.I.S. won’t function in another realm, but I’ll cross that bridge when I get there, I suppose.” 

Loki nodded distantly and backed out of the room, the guilty ache in his belly satisfied now that he’d humiliated himself by apologizing and instead replaced by that sinking feeling that had come at Tony’s apparent willingness to kiss him, but only as part of some kind of distraction technique. He stared into the middle distance, his tongue so bitter that he wanted to spit, but instead he opened the door to his bedroom to find a moving lump under his covers. He walked to the edge of the bed, throwing off the blanket to find Brunhilde burrowed underneath, her pupils immense from the lack of light. He ran his hand down her smooth back and she flipped around so that his hand touched her belly instead. She snapped over his hand like a venus flytrap, biting it playfully until he took it away. 

“Not a good time, darling,” he murmured to her as he laid down next to her in his clothes. With a cheerful chirp she climbed onto his chest and laid there, kneading her little paws into his shirt, bonking his chin with her head. Barely registering that he was doing so he stroked her slowly, trying not to think about the way Tony’s lips had parted when he had nearly kissed him and failing miserably. 

 


	10. Chapter 10

Whereas the Bifrost needed no designated entrance point on Midgard, or any other realm for that matter, it did need an exit. That exit, an observatory built on the furthest edge of Asgard, was manned by one of the most powerful gods in the realm. Heimdall.

Loki stood at his mother’s side as they faced Heimdall in his chamber, watching out of the corner of his eye as Tony craned his neck around, looking at all of the delicate, looping designs etched into the inside of the golden dome. Heimdall stood on the dais in the very center of his observatory, a tall man with very dark skin, a close-cropped goatee, and golden, shining eyes. He wore regalia similar to that of the guards that had come to the Academy with Frigga along with a helm bearing curved horns on either side of his head. He held the hilt of a sword that was inserted into some kind of cylindrical sheath mounted in the center of the room. 

“Your majesty,” he said in a rumbling voice. “Asgard was poorer for your absence and I am pleased to see you return.” His gaze fell on the two humans and a small smile crossed his serious face. “Welcome to Asgard, Anthony Stark and Janet Van Dyne. I am Heimdall, the All-seeing, and you are the first Midgardians to pass over the Bifrost in many centuries. You are Odin’s honored guests and as such I will let you pass.” Turning to Thor he said, “Welcome home, Odinson.” 

“‘Tis good to see you, Heimdall,” Thor said and offered him half a bow. 

His gaze then fell to Loki, who did his best to ignore the skin-crawling sensation of being seen by one of the hardest men to trick in Asgard. “Loki.” Loki smiled smoothly, despite a chill creeping up his spine. “I would speak to you in private.” 

Loki threw a glance to his mother, suddenly terrified that Odin had, at the last moment, forbidden his entrance into Asgard and that Heimdall meant to send him back. 

“Loki is my guest,” Frigga said, her chin held high as she regarded Heimdall. While her voice was warm there was a sharp edge to it. 

“Of course, your majesty, and all I wish for is a moment of his time. I give you my word as a loyal subject that I will send him down the bridge to Asgard in mere moments.” 

“See that you do,” Frigga said as she began to walk, gesturing to Thor and the humans to follow her. 

“You didn’t greet Brunhilde,” Loki said, reaching up to scratch the cat curled around his neck. “That’s terribly rude of you.” 

“You have been indiscreet, Laufeyson.” 

Loki twitched. “Must you?” 

“I have turned my gaze to you many times while you were in Midgard. Odin wished to hear how you were faring.” 

Loki’s stomach dropped. He could lie to his mother when necessary. He could easily lie to Odin. But Heimdall--the god who saw all--he had to take special precautions to lie to him, and he had taken none of them. In his exile he had thought that there would be no reason for Heimdall to watch him, but as Heimdall spoke he realized he should have known that Odin would be keeping close track of everything he did. 

“I know what you’ve done.” 

“You told my father,” Loki whispered, feeling as though he was about to sink through the Bifrost and fall to his death in the open space beneath. He would be punished. He would be sent to the dungeons again and his mouth went dry as he remembered that cell. Empty. Concrete floors. Magic dampeners keeping him from stepping into the space between realms. The crushing loneliness and impotent rage. “No.” He felt weak in the knees and wavered once before locking them so he wouldn’t fall, but his cheeks were pale and tears welled in his eyes. Brunhilde squeaked in alarm from his shoulder and hopped down, making a feint towards Heimdall, who simply ignored her. 

“Don’t worry Loki, I told Odin nothing of your mischief.” 

Relief flooded through him and for the barest moment he had to resist the urge to throw his arms around Heimdall as he relaxed his body by a small degree, unlocking his knees and shifting to stand taller. He wiped his eyes and steeled himself, lifting his chin haughtily as if he had not just been ready to beg for mercy. “Then why even mention it?” 

“To inform you that I will be watching you closely, at Odin’s request, and if you try to harm anyone or anything in Asgard Odin will be informed immediately. Of everything.”

“Of course he will,” Loki said flippantly, examining his nails. “Remember though, I’m here with a lover. You might wish to shield your gaze from things you don’t want to see.” 

Heimdall simply stepped aside, allowing Loki access to Asgard. Outside, Loki could see Frigga and the rest had waited for him, and he tossed his hair as he passed Heimdall and returned, once again, to his home, Brunhilde hotly on his heels. 

* * *

Whatever Tony had thought would be the first activity in Asgard was a mystery, but Loki knew he had not predicted it would be a trip to the royal tailor. Janet, of course, was thrilled. As soon as she understood what was going on she began talking to the tailor rapidly about her clothing line and what kinds of things she’d like to see in her new Asgardian outfit. Tony simply stood waiting for his turn with Loki at his side. 

“I went to Asgard and all I got was this lousy t-shirt,” he muttered, tapping his foot. 

“What are you talking about?” Loki asked. 

“It’s a joke. You didn’t tell me--” 

“I couldn’t tell you anything because I had no idea this trip was taking place, remember?” Loki watched as the tailor crouched in front of Janet to measure her inseam. “Besides, I don’t understand the objection.” Loki absently picked at the flesh of his palm, keeping an eye on the guards standing just outside the room. 

“Why do we need Asgardian clothes?” 

“To be presented in court, of course. It’s tradition.” 

“So you did know.” 

“It slipped my mind,” Loki said, bristling. “Why are you so contrary?” 

“I brought my best suits,” he muttered. “This feels awkward.” He watched Janet as she thoughtfully looked over fabric swatches, picking out all the best golds and blacks. 

“Awkward? Why?” 

“I don’t know. I think I’m just kind of annoyed that I can’t make an impression the way I normally would,” he admitted, turning his attention to Loki. “It’s out of my control, and I don’t like that.” 

“You’ll have plenty of input on what kind of clothing you’re going to wear. Look at Jan.” 

Tony did and watched as she spun in front of a wall of mirrors, examining how the back of the sparkling gown she was wearing looked on her frame. She shook her head and the tailor immediately led her behind the mirrors to change. 

“Maybe I can just get Jan to do it for me,” Tony mused. 

“If you’d like,” Loki said absently, thinking of how nice it was going to be to have access to his closet again. Most of his Midgardian clothing was mundane and functional, not that he didn't look good in it. It was just that he missed the rich silks and furs, the gold and gems, the supple leather and soft velvet. Leggings and tailored vests just didn’t cut it. “Or I could help,” he suggested, trying to put the guards out of his mind. At least on campus he didn’t feel the gaze of an entire army answering to his foster father. 

Tony looked at Loki out of the corner of his eyes, somewhat suspiciously. “Thanks for the offer, but I’ll take Jan. No offense.” 

“None taken,” said Loki, who took plenty of offense but was also bored by the proceedings and eager to see Asgard again. “How about this? I go for a walk and return in an hour, then we tour the castle--the private parts, at least, you’ll need to be in your new clothes to be seen in public--and return when the clothing is finished.” 

“Sounds good,” said Tony as he watched Janet chatting animatedly with the tailor, overhearing snippets of the conversation where she asked to try a dress with a plunging neckline as opposed to the high collar she was wearing now. Once his attention was locked on her, Loki walked away.

With Brunhilde as his side, Loki strode to the door only to be stopped by the guards who crossed their spears in front of him. “By Odin’s orders you are not allowed to leave without a chaperone,” one of them said, and Loki gritted his teeth. 

“Come now,” he said, letting a placid mask fall over his facial features to hide his annoyance. “This is my home. As much as I would appreciate a guide, I do remember how to get around on my own. I did spend two millenia here.” 

“Our orders are that you and the Midgardians are to be escorted through the palace, not to roam around alone.” 

“Thor left!” Loki raised his voice, then lowered it immediately. “What I mean to say is that if Thor is allowed to meander about there’s no reason the rest of us should be confined to one room.” 

“I’ve got a good reason,” said the other guard. “Odin’s orders. Now go sit down or something.” 

Suppressing a frustrated groan Loki returned to Tony’s side. 

“I thought you were going for a walk.” 

“I’ve changed my mind,” Loki said, draping himself over a nearby chaise lounge. “I am to play the boorish and disinterested husband while you try on shoes.” 

“I’m going to keep my rocket boots on,” Tony said with a confused glance. 

“It’s a Midgardian stereotype that I’m shocked you’re not familiar with.” With just a moment of concentration he summoned a book from his libraries, the ancient tome of old magic appearing in his hand in a puff of green smoke. “Have you never seen a sitcom?” Loki asked as he opened his book. “Men are supposedly so bored by their wives’ insistence on shopping that they sit outside forlornly holding a purse and feeling like half a man. It’s ubiquitous and stupid, like most Midgardian things.” He paused for a second before adding, “It’s also incredibly misogynistic...like most Midgardian things.” 

“When did we get married anyway?” Tony asked, sitting on the very end of the chaise, avoiding Loki’s feet. “I think I missed the engagement.” He leaned forward, propping his elbows on his knees and lacing his fingers together. “I’m trying to figure out what it means that I’m the wife in this scenario.” 

“Don’t worry your pretty little head about it, darling,” Loki said, glancing up from his book just in time to see Tony throw him a dirty look with color on his cheeks. “Just playing the part.” Loki stretched out until his feet rested against Tony’s thigh. 

“You need to stop watching TV.”

“And miss out on what passes for a meager attempt at Midgardian entertainment? Never.” Sliding further down the chaise he propped his booted feet up on Tony’s thigh, offering the same placing smile he had given the guards. 

“If I sit here long enough are you just going to ooze your way into my lap?” 

“You’ll only know if you stay here,” Loki said, looking again to his book as he crossed his legs at the ankles. “It would look authentic though, wouldn’t it?” he asked without lifting his gaze. “Perhaps I ought to.” Though he stared at the text he saw nothing, his mind’s eye flitting back to that moment in the kitchen when a little teasing had made Tony all too pliable. Flicking his gaze up he caught that flush on Tony’s cheeks again and he swung his legs off and planted them on the floor. “I’m going to go talk to the guards again,” he said, standing, leaving Tony behind him as he tried not to make anything out of how much he liked seeing Tony flustered. 

* * *

Odin’s private chambers were the last place Loki wanted to be, but Frigga had asked that the guards escorting Loki and the others around the palace show them the most impressive private areas, and Odin’s rooms  _ were _ impressive. Large columns shaped like huge humanoid figures with jutting tusks lined the hallway to Odin’s rooms, and the floors were a warm, golden marble that matched the gilded columns. Large trees in porcelain pots lined the hallways between the columns and while Loki strolled down the hall with disinterest, Tony and Jan were transfixed by the delicate designs on the planters and the realistic humanoid faces on the columns. Frescos lined the ceilings, depicting both exciting hunts and peaceful scenes of Odin with his subjects and Janet walked with her neck craned upwards for so long that she actually ran into Loki’s back when he stopped. 

With the guards at their backs and Thor at Janet’s side, Loki strode to Odin’s chambers, trying to repress the massive trove of unpleasant memories that washed through him as he opened the massive wooden doors. They opened into Odin’s den, the only portion of his many rooms that the humans were invited to see, and despite his efforts a memory of standing next to Thor in front of the fireplace struck him in the chest. 

He was young. He couldn’t be sure how young as his longevity had made the years blend together leaving Loki’s life split into chunks: childhood, adolescence, adulthood--and then there were the parts of his life that he simply wasn’t there for. He tried not to think about those. But in this memory he was very young and Odin was very angry. He had done something, possibly broken something, though he couldn’t really remember, but it had made Odin furious and that incomprensible fury had been pointed directly at his children. Odin was screaming and gesturing wildly with his spear and Loki was convinced that the full force of Gungnir was about to be unleashed upon him and Thor. Instead, they had both been confined in the dungeon, in seperate cells. Once Frigga had found out they were immediately released, but the terror of being left alone in that cell never left him and every time he had been dragged down there was worse than the last. It did not slip past him that Thor had never returned to the dungeons as a prisoner either. 

“Loki?” Tony put a hand on his shoulder and gave him a little shake. “You okay?” 

Loki blinked, not having realized he had stopped in the threshold to Odin’s den, and that Tony had been trying to snap him into awareness for the last minute. Brunhilde was licking his cheek furiously and he hadn't even registered the sandpaper scrape on his skin. 

“Just so many happy memories,” he said, worrying the middle finger of his left hand between the pointer and thumb on his right. “Let me show you where they all happened.” 

Odin’s den was a menagerie of dead animals. Heads lined every wall and heavy furs covered every soft surface. Stuffed hunting trophies were perched around the room: a bear mid-growl, a leaping antelope-like creature, a massive crocodile. The heads on the walls were all beasts that Loki knew neither Tony nor Janet would recognize, so, despite being agitated, he pointed to one of the large heads lower on the wall and beckoned the two humans to follow him to it. 

“This is a salamander from Muspelheim. They breathe fire and their skin remains warm to the touch even when they’re dead.” Knowing it would annoy Odin he prompted, “Go ahead and touch it.” 

Like children at a tactile science exhibit both Tony and Janet approached the massive head and put a hand on it. “This would make awesome cold weather gear,” said Janet as she stroked the nose of the stuffed beast. 

“Salamander leather is often used as armor for warriors sent to Jotunheim. Since the war is on again I assume there’s great need for it.” 

“I remember the first salamander I killed,” Thor said, beaming. “I was but a youth, but ‘twas the first foe I even slew with Mjolnir. We feasted for days afterwards!” 

“Yes. Roast salamander,” Loki said flatly. “Tastes like wet socks, but somehow it is one of my brother’s favorites. Have we seen enough?” 

“Surely not, brother! Come, Friend Tony, Janet, look at this bear...” As if responding to Thor's invitation, Brunhilde hopped off Loki's shoulder and trotted after him. 

As Thor led Brunhilde, Janet, and Tony away to examine the taxidermy bear Loki left the room, heading out into the hallway to lean against the wall next to one of the guards. “Don’t worry,” he said, suppressing a sneer. “I’m not going anywhere. Just can’t handle the smell of old man and spilled beer anymore.” The guards glanced at one another but apparently decided that as long as Loki was within sight they had nothing to worry about. 

Moments later, Tony came out of the room alone and stood at Loki’s side. “Too many happy memories?” he asked. 

“So many that I can barely think straight.” Loki sighed through his nose. “Is Jan enjoying the tour?” 

“She’s thrilled. Hanging on every one of Thor’s words.” Tony smiled softly. “I don’t know when I’ve ever seen her so happy before.” 

“Then why aren’t you in there with her?” 

“Had some happy fatherhood memories of my own and wanted to share them with you.” Tony offered him a knowing half-smile as he leaned on the wall next to him. 

“In solitude, perhaps,” Loki murmured, glancing out of the corner of his eye at the guard next to him. “Actually.” Loki took Tony’s hand, squeezing it tightly, much to Tony’s surprise, then, guards be damned, he took off running back the way they had come, dragging Tony with him. 

“Halt!” One of the guards yelled and they glanced at one another before apparently deciding that Thor could take care of Janet and turning to run after Loki and Tony. 

To the left of where the guards were standing, Loki and Tony stood in silence as the illusion Loki had cast led the guards away from the door. It was only when Tony went to look at Loki that he realized he was invisible, and he looked down in alarm to notice he couldn’t see his own body. 

“How--” 

“I am a very good sorcerer,” Loki said simply and released Tony’s hand. He did not, however, drop the invisibility spell, and Tony took a hesitant step away from the wall. 

“Why did you do that?” 

“Other than the fact that I can’t stand being guarded by goons who answer to my father?” Loki’s voice was sharp but tired. “I just want to go to my own room. You can go back in with Janet and Thor and I’ll get in trouble like I always do but at least I won’t be in Odin’s rooms when it happens.” 

“You’re going to get into trouble indeed, Loki,” said a voice from behind Loki and he turned around with dismay to realize a different set of guards was patrolling the hallway. 

“I...” Loki dropped the invisibility spell, his forehead in his palm. “I’m getting careless,” he muttered. “I didn’t think to mute our voices.” It had been too long since he had needed to be on guard the way he had been in the Asgardian palace, and he wasn’t thinking about patrols or silence or anything other than the sheer anticipation of getting back to his own rooms. “Go back to the den while they do whatever it is that they’re going to do to me and there will be someone to escort you elsewhere soon, I’m sure,” said Loki, and Tony frowned. 

“It’s my fault,” he said as the guards approached. “I talked him into getting me out of there.” 

“You. A Midgardian. Talked  _ Loki _ into something.” The guard snorted. “I wasn’t hired yesterday.” 

“You’d be surprised at how people act when they’re in love,” Tony said smoothly, and before Loki could respond he lifted himself onto his toes and kissed Loki gently on the temple. 

Externally, Loki smirked at the guards and snaked his arm around Tony’s waist, pulling him closer. Internally, however, he froze. There was something desperate in the way his thoughts clung to that expression of affection--false as it might be--and he felt everything inside of him start to ache. It wasn’t like before, in the kitchen, the quiet need and the flickering desire, no. This was an explosion of carefully buried memory that had been hidden safely behind walls and locks and now it was out, reminding him of what it felt like to be cared for. Underneath it all was desire, sure, but that was simply bothersome and easy to repress, but not this. This was untenable. 

Once, when he was younger, there had been a man with whom he shared a mutual infatuation. They had burned hot and bright and sputtered out when the candle melted but during the time they were together he had been so, so happy. And in his mind’s eye he could see a snippet of a moment in the gardens with that man, alone and quietly content, having his hair brushed aside so he could receive a kiss on the forehead. 

It wasn’t that the man was anything like Tony, because he wasn’t, but that man had liked him, and trusted him, and trust came at a premium when one was known as the God of Lies. And it wasn’t so much the kiss itself as it was the motivation. Tony was trying to get him out of a problem he’d caused for himself and Loki simply had no way to process the fact that someone cared enough about him to do that. 

“That’s right,” Loki said, barely registering the fact that he was speaking. Luckily, lies took very little conscious effort on his part and he continued without missing a beat. “I wouldn’t say that I’m a changed god, and I wouldn’t recommend you trust  _ everything _ I say,” he said to the guard. “But I’ve come to the conclusion that I have to be a better person, and Anthony is helping me understand how to do that.” Proud of how sincere he sounded he gave Tony a little squeeze before letting him go. 

Dubious still, the guard who he had been speaking to glanced at the other one, who looked thoughtfully at him before shrugging. 

“He didn’t exactly go anywhere,” said the other guard. “I’m sure there’s nothing wrong with standing in the hallway.” 

“He sent the guards after an illusion!” said the first guard, growing agitated. The other guard glanced at Loki and Tony out of the corner of his eyes then flicked his gaze back to the first guard, as if to try to point out that it was obvious that they had come out of the room to be alone together. 

“Since you can see that I am obviously not up to any mischief,” Loki began, smiling mildly at the guards. “Perhaps you would be so kind as to take me to my rooms. I  _ do _ need a chaperone after all, and surely one of you can leave your patrol for fifteen minutes to let me get my things.” 

“And what things are so important that you get them now?” asked the first guard before the other could answer. 

“My clothes,” Loki said. “There’s going to be a dance--” 

“There’s going to be a dance?” asked Tony with a certain sense of alarm. 

“--and it wouldn’t do for me to be dressed like this, would it?” he asked, giving Tony a sharp glance out of the corner of his eyes as he dropped the illusion of Asgardian finery and gestured to his skinny jeans tucked into nice boots and the green coat with the fur ruff. 

“Odin’s orders,” began the first guard dubiously, but the other interrupted him. 

“If one of us goes with him it will be fine. The orders were they not roam around alone, not that they couldn’t be escorted to different rooms.” 

“You can’t trust him!” 

“Oh, let it go. Stay here to watch Odinson and the other Midgardian and I’ll be back in fifteen minutes.” 

Loki beamed as the guard beckoned him and Tony to follow as he began walking down the hallway in the direction of Loki’s private rooms. Loki had only been in Asgard for an hour and a half and he had already managed to talk someone into doing something for him. 

Life was good. 

* * *

The guard led them in silence to a long hallway terminating in a marble wall, passing more humanoid figures on columns and colorful frescoes on the ceiling. The guard stopped and stepped to the side in front of the wall. 

“Uh.” Tony glanced at Loki with concern before looking around again, trying to find a door. “I thought you were taking us to Loki’s rooms,” he said, offering the guard a suspicious look. But while Tony addressed the guard, Loki simply walked into the marble wall and disappeared. “Ah. Sorry.” 

With that he strode towards the wall with purpose, grunting in surprise when he hit solid marble hard instead of passing through the way Loki had. He took a step backwards and from the wall emerged a hand with perfectly manicured, black-painted fingernails. It grabbed him by the lapel of his jacket and yanked him through the wall. 

Tony stumbled into a room with one wall missing. Columns held up a roof over a massive deck that overlooked what seemed to be endless gardens. Releasing Tony’s lapel, Loki let out a heavy, contented sigh and walked to the edge of the scrolled metal railing that lined the immense balcony. In between the outside and inside areas gauzy curtains loosely waved in a warm breeze over redwood floors polished to a mirror shine. 

“This...is not what I expected,” said Tony as he crossed the room, looking curiously at the delicate chandeliers and decorative art pieces on the walls. He wound his way around sets of small tables and chairs to meet Loki at the balcony. Brunhilde, who had been following them from the den and had apparently made her way through the doorway with no trouble, hopped onto a chaise lounge on the balcony, spun around once, and flopped into a pile of happy hairless cat. 

“Oh?” asked Loki absently from the balcony, not looking at Tony as he approached. “And what did you expect?” 

“Green,” he said as he joined him. “And black. And dark wood and velvet. Paintings of wolves that are apparently going to end the world.” Tony looked out on the flourishing gardens below where wisteria and magnolia trees hung heavy with blooms and an actual hedge maze stretched out for what looked like miles. 

“My bedroom is probably closer to what you envisioned. I’ll show you in a moment.” Loki leaned his arms on the railing and bent over, resting on them. “By all the realms it is good to be home.” His heart soured at the view that he had spent so much time looking over in his two thousand years of living in Asgard, and while he tried to ignore it, some small part of him could not forget the memory of that woman behind him nor the bittersweet tug it had on his current life.

“You said there was going to be a dance. Were you just trying to fool the guard?” 

“Hmm?” Loki sounded very far away as he stared out at the gardens. “Oh, no. That’s why you got fitted for Asgardian clothing.” 

“Why the hell aren’t you telling me anything?” Tony asked, annoyance creeping into his voice. “What else is supposed to happen that you haven’t told me about?” 

Loki turned from the view with a puzzled look on his face. “Did you want me to give you a step-by-step itinerary and spoil any surprise?”

“I just want to be prepared.” 

“I don’t know how knowing there’s going to be a dance would have prepared you for it, given that someone else will be dressing you and presenting you and whatnot, but if you insist. After the dance will be a feast of unpleasant, unseasoned roast meat and overcooked vegetables, and after that likely another trip to Odin’s den to regale the All-father with tales of Midgard. Then, we will be escorted back to my rooms for the night.” Loki returned his gaze to the garden. “Would you like to know the plans for tomorrow too?” 

“I’m not staying in a guest room?” 

“Why would you?” Loki turned around to lean against the railing, turning his attention to Tony. “We’re in love, after all. There are certain expectations.” 

A flush rose on Tony’s cheeks and he shifted awkwardly, dropping his gaze from Loki’s face to look further into the room. The door they’d entered through was simply a blank wall, leaving a closed door on the opposite wall the only visible exit from the room. Tony stared at that door before saying, “You know, you said we wouldn’t need to prove we were in a relationship but we’ve been here for less than two hours and it seems like we sure needed to do that with the guard.” 

“That was your decision,” Loki reminded him. “I could have come up with something just as quickly as you.” 

“It didn’t seem like they were ready to believe you.” Tony walked to Brunhilde’s chaise and sat on the edge of it, petting her gently as she stretched her little toes and patted him on the leg with her front paw. Loki simply shrugged. 

“Well. You have my thanks, for what it’s worth.” He joined Tony on the chaise, Brunhilde between the two of them. She stretched out further and rested her head against Loki’s thigh, her paws pressing into Tony’s. 

“I’ll take them and mount them in the trophy room with all the other rare and endangered objects I want to keep safe,” Tony said with a prize-winning grin. “So, do you want to tell me what happened outside of Odin’s den?” 

Loki twitched as a flash of memory came over him and he shook his head no, but spoke anyway, worrying the ring he wore on his right ring finger. “Just got to thinking about how many times I have been sent to the dungeons while standing in that room,” he said, his voice dark. “Did you know they have a cell specifically for me?” He perked his head up, giving Tony a sardonic smile. “Can’t wait to see if they come up with a reason to throw me in it while I’m here.” He got to his feet. “Did you want to see my bedroom?”

“Yeah,” Tony said slowly. “Wait though. Are you joking about the cell?” 

“What a question,” Loki said from where he stood above him. He looked down, his hair falling in his face around the horned crown he wore. “Why would I lie about something like that?” 

“Is that what happened when you guys got into trouble?” Tony asked with growing concern. “Does Thor have a cell waiting for him too?” 

Loki let out a bark of humorless laughter. “You’re joking. The golden boy? He who can do no wrong in the All-father’s eye?” Loki began to walk away. “No, no. Just for Loki.” He stopped before the doorway, not looking at Tony. “They kept me there for a decade, once.” 

“What the fuck?” Tony got to his feet and moved to Loki, followed closely by Brunhilde who let out a plaintive meow. 

“Oh, I’ve done terrible things, Anthony,” Loki said with a sour smile, looking over his shoulder. “They were in the past, and I am very much a different god now, but they happened.”

“That doesn’t make it okay.” Tony stopped at his side, awkwardly raised a hand to touch him on the arm, but let it drop before he did. “I’ve never told anyone other than Jan and my therapist about this, but Howard used to lock me in my room when my mom was gone. I mean, it’s not the same. It wasn’t longer than a day...usually...but I was just a kid. Only seven the first time.” 

“Hm. Seems like Howard and Odin were cut from the same cloth, doesn’t it?” Loki asked as he opened the door and passed through it. “Seems we have lots in common.” 

“This one isn’t going to hit me in the face, is it?” Tony asked as he took a tentative step forward. 

“Only if I close it.” Loki rolled his eyes and grabbed Tony’s wrist, pulling him through the door. 

Loki’s bedroom was smaller than it seemed like it should be given the room they had just left, and was dominated by an enormous four-poster bed carved from wood so dark it was nearly black. There were no curtains, as was common with this kind of bed, but it was semi-enclosed due to the wood panels that were carved into a great swooping pattern that melded with the posters on the four corners of the bed. The floor was made from the same dark wood and the walls covered in tapestries. Flickering sconces cast warm yellow light that gave the room and closed-in and intimate feel that could not have been more different from the airy balcony. 

Loki absently led him through the room, gesturing towards the bed with its green and gold bedclothes. “Was this more what you were expecting?” he asked, dropping his wrist. 

“Very much so.” 

Loki didn’t turn to face him as he crossed the room to another door and opened it up. Beyond there was a room with a large vanity and chests of drawers along one wall whereas on the opposite wall were racks and racks of clothing, mostly in Loki’s signature colors, but some rich red and pale blue was visible from the doorway. A rush of nostalgia filled Loki and he sighed gently. 

“We’re going to have to dance with one another, aren’t we?” Tony asked suddenly. 

From the door to the closet, Loki turned, closing it for the time being. “Yes. Is that a problem? We’ve danced before. Many times, actually.” 

“Well, yeah, but dancing in a group of people in a club is different from slow dancing. And there’s probably some Asgardian waltz or something I don’t know about and I’m going to trip over my feet and look like an idiot in front of an entire palace.” 

“I’ll be leading anyway,” Loki said airily, crossing the room to again stand with Tony near the bed. “So I don’t see the problem.” A curious flush played across Tony’s cheeks and Loki raised an eyebrow. “But you always lead, don’t you?” A pattern was starting to develop and along with it Loki’s interest was growing. 

“I’m not so insecure in my own masculinity that I can’t let someone else lead,” Tony said defensively. “I’m just not used to it.” 

“It can be good to let someone else take the reins now and then, don’t you agree?” Loki moved closer on a hunch. Tony took half a step backwards, but stopped before Loki was able to get Tony to actually back away from him and into the bed. “You just do what I do--” 

“Backwards.” 

“But not in heels,” Loki said with a smile, coming to a stop inches from Tony and putting his arm around him, hand firm on the small of his back. Tony jerked slightly at the touch, but made no attempt to move away from him. “That should make it easy, right?” Instead of moving away, Tony went sort of slack in Loki’s arms, and Loki watched his adam’s apple bounce as he swallowed hard. “Hand on my shoulder,” he said, taking Tony’s left hand in his right. “And take a step to the left when you do.” 

A flicker of desire began to burn in Loki’s belly as Tony looked up at him through long eyelashes and in an instant turned his gaze away, high color raising on his cheeks. Despite the blush, Tony touched his shoulder with no hesitation and began to follow his lead. Like sparks from a re-ignited fire, that desire sparked stronger as they began to dance. It wasn’t just that Tony was letting him lead, nor that they were touching, it was that Tony seemed just so eager to  _ obey _ . Red to the ears, he allowed Loki to pull him closer until their bodies nearly touched. There was something powerfully dangerous about reveling in this feeling, in this growing need, but Loki could find no way to stop. 

“You can let me go now,” Tony said, though his voice was toothless and he made no attempt to move away. In fact, if anything, he moved closer, breathing slightly harder. 

“You’d don’t want to be unprepared for tonight, do you?” Loki asked as he leaned in further, his lips close to Tony’s ear when he dipped him slightly. Tony’s breath hitched. Oh, this was fun. 

That was, until a shudder wracked Tony’s body and Loki nearly dropped him, coming down to Asgard again and finally hearing the voice in his head screaming about how he shouldn’t be enjoying this. The problem, really, was there was a not insignificant part of him that did, and it had nearly won. 

Someone theatrically clearing their throat alerted Loki to the fact that they weren’t alone in the room. Sheepishly releasing Tony he jerked his head to the side to see Frigga standing in the doorway that led to the balcony. He heard Tony take a deep breath and out of the corner of his eye saw him smoothing his jacket, eyes cast to the ground. 

“So sorry to interrupt,” she said with a tender smile. “But Anthony’s clothes are ready and we have very little time left until the dance.” She gave Loki a knowing look and stepped aside in the doorway, waiting for Tony to join her. “Obviously, you two can continue soon.” The color in Tony’s cheeks faded as he left Loki behind, not glancing back as he offered Frigga a smooth smile and asking her a question that Loki couldn’t hear. “I’ll leave you to get ready,” Frigga added as they left. 

Loki nodded, easily able to hide the internal conflict that was still roiling within him as Brunhilde, having followed from the balcony, wound around his ankles, peeping. He crouched and scooped her up, stroking her head as Frigga led Tony out of the room. 

“That was bad, darling,” he whispered as he deposited her onto the bed. “Very bad.” She peeped again as if to question him, but he was already on his way to the closet, shedding his coat onto the floor as he went. It seemed now as though there were  _ two _ patterns making themselves known, not just the one. 

So Tony liked to be pushed. No great surprise when Loki spent a moment thinking back onto the sort of women he knew Tony had dated. And no problem, either, really. There were entire Midgardian subcultures devoted to people like that. But the other pattern, the infinitely more problematic one, was how much he liked being the one doing the pushing. Convincing Tony to play pretend had been hard enough; convincing himself to  _ stop _ playing was going to be even harder. 

 


	11. Chapter 11

Tony looked at himself in the wall of mirrors inside the tailor’s chamber, trying to reconcile the fact that apparently how he looked now was more appropriate for the Asgardian court than a nice three-piece Armani suit would have been. Janet had picked out every aspect of his outfit, and he trusted her, but he couldn’t help but feel like he was in someone else’s body. 

Instead of the kind of fancy, Asgardian boots that Loki usually wore, Janet had suggested he wear his rocket boots over the black trousers. They matched the outfit, as did the gauntlet he wore, and allowed him to keep a hint of his flashy, sleek suit to show off to the Asgardian court. It would have been inappropriate, she said, to completely ignore the Iron Man suit while trying to make an impression, given how much the suit was a part of him. 

The rest of the outfit was all Asgardian, and all Janet, and he had to admit she had done a pretty good job with what she had to work with. On top he wore a high-collared, white, button-down shirt, tucked into a deep red, v-necked tunic that let the glow from his arc reactor remain visible underneath the shirt. The tunic had gold embroidery around the edges and over it he wore a half-cape made of a black material that shifted to deep red when he moved. Around his waist was a gold sash and the entire outfit was offset by the gold torque around his neck.  

“Okay, I admit, I look pretty good, but only if I was going to a renaissance festival.” he said he turned around in front of the mirror, craning his neck to look at the back of the outfit. “Why do Asgardians dress like it’s still Ye Olde Medieval Times?” 

Jan was in golden gown made from a semi-metallic material printed with the concentric circle design that was as common as the asgardian rope motif that was embroidered into Tony’s tunic. Her dress had a plunging neckline and a black silk sash around her waist, and she wore long black gloves that reached her elbows. With a smile, she adjusted the way the torque sat around Tony’s neck and looked him over, nodding with satisfaction. “They don’t all dress like this; it’s just what suits you best.” 

“Well, I’ve got some good news,” said Tony, holding up the gauntlet, which projected a holographic image of the Iron Man helmet. “I may look like I’m about to go jousting--” 

“You absolutely do not,” Jan interrupted. 

“But I found out that J.A.R.V.I.S. somehow still works here. Don’t you J.A.R.V.I.S.?”

“Indeed, sir,” came a digitized voice from the hologram. “Though I have a dramatically decreased ability to access information due to lack of internet connectivity, I am able to control the suit as though I was still on Earth.” 

“Pretty neat, huh? But I really would have expected Asgard to have some kind of version of the internet.” 

“Maybe they just don’t want to give you the wi-fi password,” Janet said with a grin. “Anyway, you look fantastic and everyone is going to love you.” She straightened the sash around his waist. “What happened when you and Loki took off, by the way? Those guards were really pissed when they got back.”

“If they’re going to love me, they’re going to worship you, look at you, you’re stunning,” Tony said with a gentle smile, but he was troubled. Though Tony had managed to keep his mind off of the dance in Loki’s bedroom, Janet’s reminder placed him right back there, in Loki’s arms, trying to reconcile the way his body was reacting to his friend’s touch. “We went to his rooms. You should see his balcony. It looks nothing like what you’re expecting.” he heard himself say. Guilt was strong in his chest. He hated not telling Janet about something, but there was too much going on with Loki that was confusing and embarrassing and awkward. Loki had never been like this before, so Tony figured it was something about being home, some kind of excitement that he just happened to be the outlet for given their proximity. 

But was that what he wanted? That was the question. 

“Jan--” 

But as he began to speak to her, Thor entered the room and her face went soft and happy and she left Tony at the mirror to cross the room. Thor was wearing something similar to what he usually did, the breastplate with the metal circles, with a cape and touches of Asgardian finery that made him look far more like the prince he was. In the mirror he watched them hug, watched Jan put her head gently on his chest, and smiled. Seeing her happy, well, that was everything, and enough to put Loki out of his mind for a moment. 

“My darling, you are stunning. Every time I think you cannot outdo yourself, you do. I must be a fool to think your beauty has any limit.” Thor said. Janet blushed and buried her face into Thor’s chest. “I have come to escort you to the ball,” he said to Janet, then glanced at Tony standing alone near the mirror. “Friend Tony, my brother has asked that I bring you as well as he is still getting ready.” 

“Yeah, of course,” Tony said, stepping away from the mirror and joining the two of them as Jan released Thor from her hug. “Ready when you two are.” 

“Then follow me,” Thor took Janet’s hand and led her out of the room, Tony following, his rocket boots clicking hard on the marble floor.

* * *

It didn’t surprise Tony that the ballroom was an immense room that looked like it would have swallowed several floors of Stark tower while still having room for more. Excess in size and decoration was a pattern here, and as Tony followed Thor to a dais in the front of the room, he looked curiously at all the Asgardians gathered around in the room. The crowd was intense, far bigger than any group of people he had faced at a gala or red carpet event, and even he felt a little nervous knowing he was going to be presented like a debutant. Thor walked with Janet’s arm in his elbow, waving to the crowd with his free hand. Cheers followed them as the Asgardians realized who he was, and Tony thought back to how Loki had said Thor would be the bigger draw than Tony and Jan, and he was starting to understand what he meant. At least in the room, there didn’t seem to be anyone more popular than Thor. For his part, he greeted everyone close enough to do so, shaking hands and patting shoulders on his way to the dais where Odin and Frigga waited. Tony noticed with dismay that Loki wasn’t with them, and began to get the feeling that he was, somehow, being stood up. 

That’s when he stepped onto the dias from behind his mother, and in an instant Tony understood why Loki had been worshipped. 

The horned crown Loki wore was more delicate than the one he wore on campus and was studded with black opals in between the horns, resting on his forehead like a diadem. He wore a tight black top made of overlapping leather, a flat gold necklace offsetting the high collar. Long gloves missing the fingertips covered his hands, and a loose belt around his waist was clasped on his hip with a circular gold buckle. He wore tight black trousers in the same pattern as his top, and knee-high boots made of some kind of iridescent scales that shifted from black to green as he walked. Over his shoulders he wore a feathered green cape, the feathers the same kind of iridescent as the boots. His hair was loose but pinned back and threaded with delicate gold strands. His eyes were lined with understated eyeliner, and as always his nails were painted black. Loki stood tall with his chin tilted up as he overlooked the crowd and a small round of applause circled the room at his appearance. He was, apparently, at least a little more popular than he had claimed. 

Tony realized then that he had stopped and stared as Thor and Janet passed him by and the crowd had closed around him. His heart was pounding as he worked his way around Asgardians on his way to the dais. He watched as Loki leaned over to his mother to whisper something lost in the din of the crowd. She pointed towards Tony as he approached and Loki offered her a tender smile. 

As Tony finally arrived at the dais Loki took a few steps down to take his hand and lead him up with the rest of the royal family and Jan. 

“I thought you were going to stand me up,” Loki whispered just loudly enough for Tony to hear. 

“You look...”  _ beautiful _ , his brain supplied, but instead he finished with “...different.” 

“Was I going to wear that coat to a royal ball? If I’m going to be home I’m going to make a bloody impression.” He led Tony onto the dais with him to stand next to Frigga. “You look good,” he said. “Janet did you justice.” Around them the crowd applauded, murmured conversation ringing around them loudly until Odin thumped his spear against the ground and gestured for silence. It was given immediately and Tony swallowed hard under the weight of a thousand eyes that had suddenly turned at the sound of the spear. 

“Welcome, Asgardians,” Odin began, taking a step in front of the others. “You have been invited here on a most monumental occasion. For the first time in more than four hundred years we are joined by citizens of Midgard.” 

The crowd applauded, some people holding their arms over their head in excitement, leading Tony to wonder what impression Asgardians held of humans. They were being presented like guests, but he got the feeling at least some in the crowd considered them a novelty. 

“These Midgardians are exemplary of their kind: brilliant, talented, and knowledgeable. They are the honored guests of the crown and should be treated as such. May I now present to you the Midgardians: Janet Van Dyne and Anthony Stark!” 

Tony felt a hand on the small of his back and turned slightly to realize Loki was pushing him forward. Taking Janet’s arm by the elbow, Tony took a few steps in front of Odin and the others and the crowd went wild. Janet, less used to the pressure of crowds than Tony, began to shake just a little and he released her arm so he could grasp her hand and squeeze it tightly. She squeezed back until his fingers hurt, but she managed to raise her other hand and politely wave to the crowd. Tony did the same with the hand in the Iron Man gauntlet, and as the crowd caught sight of it, a heavy thread of whispers strung its way around the room. 

“And of course, we welcome home my children,” Odin said as Tony and Janet stepped back. “I present to you my child, both son and daughter, Loki of Asgard!” Loki took a few steps forward, his chin held high, light glinting off of his horns. 

Applause rippled through the crowd, enthusiastic but polite, and when it died down Loki returned to Tony’s side, a far-away look on his face. 

“And I present to you my son, returned from Midgard to his home, Thor Odinson!” 

Then Thor stepped forward, and the crowd lost its mind.

When Loki had told Tony that Asgard loved Thor more than he could imagine, he had thought it was part of Loki’s sibling rivalry, just jealousy, but it seemed now that the room had proved him right. 

Screams and whoops rose up from the crowd along with a thunderous applause that rivaled Thor’s own thunder. Tony glanced out of the corner of his eye to see Loki, jaw set as he gritted his teeth, looking at at the crowd with daggers in his gaze. Hesitantly he touched his hand, and Loki blinked in surprise, looking down at Tony, who, without really understanding why he was doing so, took Loki’s hand and gave it a squeeze. 

“Now then,” said Odin once the crowd had died down. “We are not here to talk.” Faint music began playing from the four corners of the room, strings and piano flowing through the air and slowly rising in volume. “We are here to enjoy ourselves like Asgardians.” A ripple of applause ran through the crowd. “So dance, eat, and know you are welcome in the house of the All-father!” 

With that, the music swelled until it was heard throughout the room, and once a round of applause had died down, Odin turned away from the crowd to address the others. 

“Well,” he said, looking from Thor to Loki, then Jan to Tony. “Dance and enjoy yourselves. I shall see you at the feast. You are welcome in the dining hall at any time.” With that, he and Frigga walked down the back of the dais, leaving Tony and the others to step down the front and into the crowd. 

“Amazing,” Loki said as he took Tony’s hand. “That’s the first time I’ve seen my father not screaming incoherently in decades. I almost thought he’d do it out of custom alone.” The bitterness in Loki’s voice was razor sharp and Tony found himself at a loss for words to say. The Odin he’d met had been nothing but kind, in the way of someone of much higher status, but still kind, and Loki’s viciousness seemed unearned. 

But, there was the prison cell, and though it seemed unconscionable, he trusted Loki about that one. 

“Loki of Asgard,” Loki muttered as he took Tony in his arm, lifting his hand as he had in the bedroom. “Can’t even pretend I’m Odinson, can he?” 

“Would it be Odin _ son _ ?” Tony asked with genuine curiosity. “Since you’re, well, you’re not a son or a daughter.” 

“You know what I mean, Anthony,” Loki said as they began to dance, the music livelier than that Tony had imagined he and Loki were dancing to in his bedroom. Thinking of that his mouth felt a little dry and he found he couldn’t meet Loki’s eyes. Loki didn’t seem to notice, as he was gazing out at the crowd. “You understand now about Thor, yes?” 

“Yeah,” Tony said with a frown. “But they weren’t silent when you were introduced.” 

With flat laughter Loki pulled Tony a bit closer, though not as close as they had been in his bedroom. “They’re applauding their King’s child for their King. So Odin can feel accomplished in having raised a child worth presenting to court. But we all know who’s more  _ worthy _ don’t we?” 

“You don’t have to compare yourself to your brother. You can be Loki, not Loki, Thor’s younger sibling. Just forget about Thor, dance with me, and pretend to have a little fun.” Tony said, and Loki only let out a another humorless laugh, so they danced in silence. Occasionally he caught Janet dancing with Thor, once meeting her eyes. She glanced quickly from him to Loki and mouthed “good job” before she fell out of sight, Thor dipping her deep. 

“We don’t have to do this for long,” Loki said as he led him further through the crowd while they danced, as though he were apologizing for the imposition. “Enough to satisfy my father and we can leave until the feast.” 

“The last time I was dancing with someone in public I ended the night with a drink poured over my head,” Tony said as Loki led. “So, so far so good.” 

“What did you do wrong?” Loki asked with a raise of his brow. 

“Oh, who knows? When don’t I do something wrong?” 

“That’s a startling bit of humility from you, Anthony.” Loki spun him, dipped him, and grinned. “Can we start with the kale smoothies if we’re counting your sins?”

“I will never understand why you hate kale so much,” Tony said, then turned as he felt a hand tapping him on the shoulder. 

“Brother!” Thor said with characteristic enthusiasm. “How would you like to switch partners for a song?” A little stunned by the suggestion, Tony blinked at Loki. 

“It’s customary,” Loki said with a frown, releasing Tony and holding out his hand for Janet. “Just bring him back to me.” Loki’s voice was low, and though it only came in an instant, Tony thought it sounded a bit like a threat. 

“Of course!” Thor took Tony by the hand and led him a few steps into the crowd, putting his hand on the small of his back and beginning to lead. “Friend Tony!” he began, offering him a wide, genuinely delighted smile. “How are you enjoying yourself?” 

“It’s been fun,” Tony said, feeling a bit awkward to be dancing so closely to Thor. “Feels like a lot of the galas I’ve been to, just on a larger scale. It’s incredible how many people are here.” 

“Aye. It feels as though my father invited half of Asgard, doesn’t it? He is happy to have you here and wanted to show it.” Thor grinned, moving Tony through the crowd with less finesse than Loki, but what he lacked in grace he made up for in enthusiasm. “I saw you dancing with my brother,” he said with his voice low, leaning in to keep himself heard only by Tony. “It gladdens me to see how happy he is with you. My brother deserves such goodness in his life.” 

Somewhat startled, Tony cleared his throat and offered Thor an awkward smile. “Well, I like him a lot, so I’m glad he’s happy.” Out of the corner of his eye he could see Loki and Janet dancing with one another, Loki bending to say something close to her ear that made Janet laugh riotously. Tony smiled a little. Maybe under it all he  _ was _ happy. 

Once the song finished, Thor led Tony back to Loki, taking Janet’s hand with the most tender look on his face as he drew her near. “As promised, your beloved,” Thor said, patting Tony on the shoulder before swinging away with Janet, just as quickly as he had come. 

The music changed then, to a soft, slow song that drew couples closer to one another, and Tony felt himself being pressed up against Loki’s body. He opened his mouth to complain, but with Loki’s hand hard against the small of his back he found his customary wit failing him. 

“Put your head on my shoulder,” Loki whispered, and Tony looked up and him, brows furrowed. 

“Why?” 

“Because Odin is staring. I’m sure he suspects that my being here is part of some kind of trick and if he’s watching we might as well be convincing.” 

Tony resisted the urge to point out that it  _ was _ some kind of trick, but thought better of it as he laid his head on Loki’s feathered shoulder. In a moment, he felt Loki’s hand on the back of his neck, stroking it with his fingertips. 

He wondered then, for the first time, why Loki actually hadn’t been able to find someone on Earth. He was beautiful, and for some people that alone would have been enough to want to get to know him better. And he wasn’t necessarily standoffish; he had friends, and it seemed like there was little stopping one of them from falling for him. There didn’t seem to be a reason he should be alone. 

Loki’s fingers strayed from Tony’s neck and moved down his spine. Tony found himself shivering and nearly apologized, but if nothing else, he thought, if it was visible it would look very realistic. Loki eyed him, and Tony knew at once that he’d felt it, and a blush began to crawl up his cheeks. Loki said nothing though, just swayed with Tony to the music. 

Once the slow dance ended Tony noticed Thor changing partners again, Janet happily taking the hands of a woman in green as lively music echoed through the hall. Loki released Tony enough that they were no longer touching, and as the dance continued Tony saw, out of the corner of his eyes, that Thor changed partners a dozen times before someone finally came and tapped Loki on the shoulder. It was an older woman with red curls and lovely eyes and Loki reluctantly let go of Tony to dance with her. A stranger took Tony by the hand and he was swept into the crowd again, awkwardly dancing with a man with a close-trimmed brown beard and laughing blue eyes. 

By the time Tony returned to Loki he had been passed around half a dozen times, and Thor, from what Tony could tell, had gotten twice as many partners, though in between every dance he returned to Janet, once kissing her tenderly as she threw her arms around his neck. Tony returned to Loki to find him standing alone, and something in his chest felt very tight. 

“I’ve had enough of this,” Loki said wearily, and Tony couldn’t help but feel bad for him. If this had been a competition, Thor had won by an enormous degree, and Loki had been left in the cold. The tight feeling in his chest grew and he took Loki’s hand in his, sliding his hand to the small of his back and pulling him close. 

“One more dance,” he said with a smile, and though surprise was the most evident emotion on Loki’s face, he thought he could see something tender in his eyes. 

* * *

After the last dance Loki wearily led Tony to the dining hall. It was decorated in a similar fashion to the hallway with gilded columns and marble floors, but the room was dominated by a great wooden table big enough to seat at least thirty. It was laden with everything Loki had said it would be, mostly huge portions of meat, including a whole hog dead center, surrounded by onions and potatoes. 

“It’s not impossible to get good food here,” Loki said as he led Tony to a chair. Diners were beginning to drift in and he sat next to Tony two seats away from the hog. “It’s only impossible when Odin is the one picking it out.” Loki fiddled with a fork when he sat, spinning it between his fingers as a server came and placed two large mugs of ale in front of them. Tony gazed down at it in dismay. 

“I guessing I’m not going to be able to get some water instead of this, huh?” Though beer wasn’t his drink of choice back when he’d been drinking heavily, the smell of it brought back memories, and the desire to drink it was strong. 

“Hmm?” Loki looked up from the fork, then widened his eyes as something clicked in his brain. “Take this away,” he said, as another server passed, handing them Tony’s mug. “And bring water in the same kind of cup.” 

“Of course, Your Highness,” said the server, and disappeared into the kitchens. 

Relief washed over Tony and in that moment he wanted desperately to give Loki a hug. Very few people allowed him to refuse alcohol without question, and though he had never explained his alcoholism to Loki, it seemed like he either was trying to be accommodating or had picked up Tony’s aversion to alcohol from context clues.

“Thanks,” he said as a mug of water was placed in front of him. “I just...it’s been a really long road to get sober and--” 

“You don’t have to explain yourself to me.” Loki said as people began to file in one by one, taking seats further down the table. “Just don’t let my father know or he’ll think you’re weak.” It was then that Frigga entered the room and sat at Loki’s side. 

“It looked like you two were enjoying yourselves out there,” she said in a private tone, leaning in to speak only to Loki and Tony. “It does a mother good to see her child happy.” Loki only gave her a wan smile. 

Before Frigga could continue, Odin entered the room to applause and made his way to the center of the table, between Frigga and an open chair that was quickly filled by Thor. A flurry of activity from the servers happened as Odin sat. Beer was brought to everyone but Tony and Loki, who already had his. Servers with knives began slicing the huge hunks of meat and placing the slices on trays to be passed around the table while baskets of bread rolls and trays of thick, yellow butter began to be circulated. Tony was reminded of Thanksgiving, though on a much larger scale, and with less variety of food. He glanced to his side to find Loki glumly looking at the meat on his plate. He opened his mouth to say something, but was drowned out by Odin. 

“Son!” he shouted with delight as Thor came to his side. “It pleases me so to see you return to your home. How has Midgard treated you?” 

It did not slip past Tony that Odin hadn’t even bothered to address Loki when he sat, and when he looked to Loki he found him staring into the middle distance, fiddling with the ring on his right hand. His mother gently put a hand on his arm and though he glanced at her Tony could tell he wasn’t actually looking. The set of his jaw seemed dangerous. 

As the diners, even Loki, began to eat, Tony tried to drown Odin out, a sour taste in his mouth as he doted upon Thor, hanging on his every word. The more Thor spoke, the more Loki faded, and Tony couldn’t help but wish there was something he could do to bring him back from whatever trip he was on, because it seemed unpleasant. 

“You’ve missed such great battles,” Odin was saying when Tony focused in. “Jotenheim alone!” 

At the name Loki snapped back down to himself and sent a glare towards Odin, who wasn’t facing him enough to notice it. 

“We’re winning the war, my son. Hundreds of frost giants lay slain and even that coward Laufey--” 

There was a loud slam and the sound of a chair scraping on the floor. The entire table went silent and looked as Loki got to his feet and, without giving the diners a second glance, stormed out of the room. 

“Humph,” grumbled Odin. “Can’t even bother to sit through a meal with his family,” he said just loudly enough for Tony to hear. Frigga immediately jumped to Loki’s defense, but Tony barely heard it. A sick feeling was beginning to grow in Tony’s stomach as he realized what had just happened. Odin had been bragging about killing frost giants with a frost giant sitting two seats away from him at the table. Memories of Howard complaining about his “sissy of a son,” in front of him hit him like a brick wall and he immediately got to his feet. 

The entire table watched him as he walked out of the room, leaving Janet staring at him with concern and Odin glaring after him. 

Loki was nowhere to be found in the hallway, and Tony had no idea where to go. He thought that Loki was most likely to go to his rooms, but finding them was another story. The dining hall and ballroom were in a completely different part of the palace, and he looked down the hallways with dismay before lifting his glove and activating J.A.R.V.I.S.

“Can you find Loki?” he asked as he began walking back to the ballroom, trying to trace his steps backwards. “His bedroom has a secret doorway, so maybe if you could map the castle--” 

“I’m afraid that is beyond my capabilities here,” J.A.R.V.I.S. apologized. “Had I been with you when you were in his room for the first time I could lead you back there, but as it stands I have no working map of the castle.” 

“Well, shit.” 

It was then that Tony found a set of guards patrolling the hallway in the distance and he began to jog after them. His rocket boots were loud on the marble floors and before he was close enough to speak to him they turned around and stared. 

“Where’s Loki’s room?” he asked without greeting them. 

“On the other side of the palace,” one said, and Tony’s heart sank. 

“Could one of you take me there?” 

“No. Our patrol takes us nowhere near the private quarters.” 

“Then, can you lead me to someone who can?” His heart was tight in his chest and he was beginning to feel an ounce of panic set in. “It’s very important.” 

“You’re the Midgardian he brought here, aren’t you?” asked the guard who hadn’t spoken yet. 

“Yes. That’s why it’s important. I...He’s...He’s upset and I need to be with him,” he finished. “Someone has to,” he added, starting to feel that sour taste on his tongue grow. 

“Alright,” said the first guard with what sounded like sympathy. “Let me find you one of the housekeepers. They go everywhere in the palace and will be able to lead you there. Stay here.” 

With that the guard left him with the other one, who said nothing as they stood together waiting. 

Ten minutes passed before the guard returned with a young man in a clean white uniform who gave Tony a curious smile. “Come with me,” he said as the guards went back to their patrol. “I know a back way.” 

Back way or not it took another fifteen minutes to reach Loki’s rooms and as every moment passed Tony became more impatient. If they had been on campus Loki wouldn’t have gotten this far without someone, either Tony or Janet, maybe Kamala or some of his other friends coming to his side to tell him things were going to be alright. Knowing one of his friends was suffering alone hurt. 

Finally they reached the blank wall and Tony thanked the housekeeper, reaching into his pocket to give him a tip but realizing he didn’t have any Asgardian coinage to do so with. By the time he went to apologize the housekeeper was already on his way down the hallway. 

Tony looked at the blank wall with dismay, remembering how it hadn’t let him in until Loki had grabbed him, and gently put a hand up to touch it. To his surprise, his hand went right through, and he stepped into the room with no resistance. 

Tony realized instantly that something wasn’t right. He was certain that the door had emptied him out into the balcony the first time he had passed through it, but this time he was in what looked like a bathroom with a waterfall pouring into a massive tub. He blinked and reached for the door again, but touched only solid marble wall. 

“Hoo, boy.” He strode to an open door across the room with purpose, waking through it and ending up in what looked like a sitting room with a recessed pit in the middle of the floor covered in cushions and surrounding a deep fire pit. There were two exits to this room and Tony sighed as he picked one. “This isn’t going to put me into the bedroom, is it?” he asked aloud as he stepped through, finding himself on the balcony. 

A few moments passed as Tony backtracked through doors, realizing that some kind of Asgardian technology was teleporting him around randomly rather than letting him move from room to room like one would normally do. He ended up in the bathroom three more times before finally being deposited in the bedroom where he found Brunhilde curled up on the bed and the door to the closet open. 

“Loki?” he asked as he entered, finding Loki’s feathered cape thrown over the bed. He crossed the room to the closet and gently knocked on the open door before sticking his head in. 

Loki was sitting at the vanity in silence, his crown on the table in front of him. 

“Hey,” Tony entered the room a few steps and went to move to Loki’s side, but Loki threw him a merciless glare and Tony stopped where he stood, his mouth going dry. “Loki, I’m sorry.” 

If Loki heard him, he made no indication of it. “Do you know what a frost giant looks like, Anthony?” Loki asked, turning back to the mirror. 

“No, I’ve never seen one.” 

“Yes, you bloody have.” Loki got to his feet, pushing the chair to the side so roughly that it fell, and as he began to approach Tony, something changed. 

Loki’s pale skin began to shift as a blue cast came over him, and though he tried not to make the comparison, Tony couldn’t help but think of Bruce Banner changing into the Hulk as Loki began to grow in size. By the time he was halfway across the room he was a head taller than he had been seconds ago, and his irises had turned red, the white sclera of his eyes turning black. Startled by how furious the set of Loki’s face was, Tony took a few steps backwards until he ran into the wall. Horns were now growing from Loki’s forehead, mimicking the crown he always wore, and Tony only had a moment to wonder if he wore the horns out of aesthetic or to call attention to his lineage. 

“This! Is what a frost giant looks like!” Loki shouted, storming across the room to Tony, who flattened himself against the wall, never having seen Loki angry like this before. 

“Look at me!” he shouted, though Tony had never looked away. “I am the ancient enemy of Asgard, heir to a race of evil, child of a coward,” Loki snarled as he came to a stop in front of Tony, inches from his face. Tony realized then that fangs had grown in Loki’s mouth and he swallowed hard at the unfamiliar man in front of him. 

Sometimes, when Tony’s heart began to race, he worried that the arc reactor wasn’t working properly, that the shrapnel in his chest was making its way to his heart and in seconds he would be dead. This time though, he knew exactly why his heart was pounding, and a mortified chill struck him in the chest as he realized the blood was rushing to his groin.

If Loki was trying to show him that he was frightening, it wasn’t exactly working. Blue, horned, and big, even with his unnatural eyes, he was just as beautiful as he was on the dance floor. The memory of being nearly pinned in the kitchen struck him hard and he tried to think about anything else other than the way Loki’s eyes had looked so hungry as he came near him. Tony opened his mouth to say something and was silenced immediately by a snarl from Loki. 

“I am a war prize!” Loki spat, his teeth gritted in fury. “I am the monster that Asgardians warn their children about and I am the laughingstock of everyone who knows what I am!” Loki was breathing heavily as he loomed over Tony, and Tony swallowed hard. 

“No you’re not,” he heard himself saying, trying still to find something to think about that would stop him from getting hard. It was horrifying. Even if he was able to admit to himself that there was something about being the target of aggression turned him on, this was the worst possible moment for it to happen. He had never seen Loki so angry and he hated himself for his body’s reactions. “You’re not a monster.” 

“What am I then, Anthony?” Loki slammed a fist on the wall next to him. “WHAT AM I?” 

“You’re Loki!” he shouted back. “Listen to me for a second, just listen to me.” The anger in Loki’s red eyes did not diminish and Tony closed his, trying to focus, trying to ignore his hard cock under his tunic. “Remember the spying device? Remember how I told you it’s not a mouse or a bird, it’s a medium that can turn into either one? You’re the medium, Loki! It doesn’t matter if you’re a frost giant or an Asgardian, you’re LOKI!” 

Loki’s gaze was so heavy that Tony almost couldn’t stand it but he kept talking. “You’re always Loki! No matter what shape you take or what gender you are you’re yourself! You’re not a monster,” he said, stunned as he realized tears were coming to Loki’s eyes. Much to his relief his cock began to grow soft again and he reached out for Loki, grabbing him so suddenly that Loki tripped forward into him, taken off guard by Tony’s hug. “You’re my friend. And I don’t think you’re a bad person, no matter what you’ve done and no matter what you are. And fuck Odin! Fuck him!” Tears began to well in his own eyes and a lump rose in his throat. “You’re Loki,” he whispered, and realized then that Loki had shrunk, the horns retreating back into his forehead. Loki was slack in his arms but he held him tight, cupping the back of his head with his gauntleted hand and swallowing hard as tears rolled down his cheeks. 

After a moment, Loki pushed away from him and Tony wiped his eyes, surprised at himself for how wet his cheeks were. 

“I’m going to bed,” Loki said, sounding small and defeated. “You can sleep wherever you want but I’m going to bed.” He sounded exhausted, and Tony didn’t blame him, but there was a certain sense of loss in having Loki pull away. He wanted him in his arms again. 

Loki walked deeper into the closet and while Tony watched he undid his shirt in the back, throwing a glance over his shoulder that Tony understood immediately. He left the room and went to his suitcase, pulling out a t-shirt and a pair of sweatpants. Not wanting to brave the maze of doorways to get somewhere else to sleep he was already in Loki’s bed when Loki exited the closet. He felt movement next to him as Brunhilde headbutted his shoulder before crossing the bed to be with Loki, who climbed in on the opposite side of Tony. The bed was big enough for at least four people so there was no way they would disrupt one another’s sleep, and Tony stared at the nicely decorated wall, feeling very alone despite knowing Loki was on the other side. 


	12. Chapter 12

Tony had woken up in the middle of the night to the sensation of something moving on the bed next to him. He rolled onto his back, bleary-eyed and looking around the room to find what had woken him. Loki was sitting up in bed next to him--Loki the frost giant. Loki with red eyes and blue skin and big, curved horns. Tony had very little time to try to reconcile the fact that he found Loki attractive in a form that apparently upset him, because as soon as he sat up Loki was on top of him.

Loki had him pinned to the bed, a strong hand encircling each wrist, holding them still against the pillow Tony was pushed back onto. The sconces were flicking low enough for Tony to see the intensity in his red eyes with their blacked-out sclera, and when Loki’s fingers came tighter around his wrists he could feel claws digging into his skin. Loki’s lips were parted just enough for Tony to see his fangs, and once again feel his body responding. He realized then that even with as angry Loki had been, even as traumatic as it had been in the closet, he had to have noticed that Tony had gotten hard. 

“Loki, I’m sorry, I didn’t me--” 

It was then that Loki straddled him, tightly gathering both of Tony’s wrists in one hand so he could use the other to push his t-shirt up around his armpits. One knee slid between his legs and Tony moved in the only way he could, lifting his hips to try to touch Loki’s body, his mind bubbling full of signs he had apparently been too much of an idiot to notice. The hungry look in the kitchen, the firm hand on his back in the bedroom, the press of Loki’s body flush with his own on the dance floor. Loki  _ wanted _ him, and as he felt cool air on his belly while Loki pulled down his sweatpants, he knew he wanted him too. 

“Loki, hey, slow down,” he said as he felt Loki’s free hand brush over his cock, already hard from proximity and immobility. Loki looked up from where he had pulling down his boxer briefs, his face lit from the arc reactor below, and leaned forward to bite down on Tony’s lower lip. He tugged, digging his nails deeper into Tony’s wrists, and Tony let out a deep, shuddering breath. 

“Okay, you know what? I was wrong,” Tony lifted his legs and crossed his ankles over Loki’s hips, trying to pull him closer. “Full speed ahead.” With a chuckle Loki made himself pliable, let Tony press his body against him, and this time when he leaned forward it was to kiss him. Tony bucked his hips upward as Loki’s tongue filled his mouth, belatedly realizing that Loki must be naked from the way he felt skin against the tip of his cock when their bellies touched. He relaxed his legs, trying to kick off his sweatpants and failing, letting out a groan of frustration at the lack of sensation when Loki moved away. 

“Come back,” he said breathlessly as Loki released him just long enough to grab the waistbands of his sweatpants and boxer briefs and yank them down to his ankles. He felt a flush hot on his chest, his cheeks, his ears, as he tried to reconcile the fact that he was naked and underneath one of his best friends. Making out would be one thing, and when Loki rested between his legs it was to kiss him again, his tongue thick and the breath through his nose hot against Tony’s cheek, but this was something entirely different. He wanted to ask Loki why, if it upset him so much, he had come to him as a frost giant, but his head was too incoherent to come up with the question. As if knowing he meant to ask, Loki pressed one finger firmly to Tony’s lips. 

“I knew you’d try to lead,” he said, his voice low in his throat, and with both hands he grabbed underneath Tony’s knees to yank his legs upwards, spreading them so he could position himself on his knees between Tony’s legs. Tony sat up onto his elbows and opened his mouth to protest, to say something about how he had never done this before with anyone other than women, or that he wanted to move just a little more slowly, but Loki said “Anthony,” in a slow, warning tone, and he flopped back against the pillows. 

“Alright,” said Tony as Loki moved over him again. “Just...slow.”

Loki’s lips were on his neck then, the horns bumping his cheek, and as Loki moved down his body Tony hesitantly lifted a hand to touch them. The texture was rough and the horn felt heavy in Tony’s hand. Wondering if Loki could feel it at all he stroked it as Loki made his way down, past his arc reactor, lips on his stomach, one hand between his legs stroking him. Loki kept hold of one wrist as he teased, barely touching him half the time, a thumb across his nipple, a kiss on his ear, the quickest, lightest stroke of his cock, holding down his hips with one knee to keep him from thrusting against his hand. Immensely frustrated, Tony squeezed his hand around the horn and tried to pull Loki up for another kiss. 

Slowly, Tony started to feel the rough texture in his hand go smooth, and when he looked down he realized that Loki was the familiar Loki again, wearing his crown with the black opals, and Tony bent to grab him by the cheeks, pulling him up to kiss him again, jerking his hips upwards to press his cock into Loki’s waiting hand. Now, though, Loki wasn’t so forceful. He let himself be moved, let Tony have the use of his hands to slide them down his back, and when Tony gasped away from a kiss he felt Loki nuzzle into his neck and run his tongue along the curve of it, playing over his jawline and up to his ear, where he dropped a gentle kiss. 

“Closer,” Loki whispered, and Tony did everything he could to comply, but their bodies were so flush that Tony actually wondered if the rim of the arc reactor was uncomfortable against Loki’s chest. They moved together, rocked slowly as Tony entangled his fingers into Loki’s hair and used that hand to cradle his face against his neck. Loki’s mouth was hot and his teeth feather light and Tony ached for him. 

It was then that Tony woke up. 

Tony was laying flat on his back in the darkness, a hot, wet spot spreading in his boxer-briefs, his cock still hard and everything about him felt both right and wrong at the same time. 

Tony swung his legs over the side of the bed and moved to his suitcase, lifting his t-shirt so the light of his arc reactor could guide him. In silence he changed his underwear, trying not to dwell on the dream. It wasn’t abnormal to have a dream like that about someone you’re close to, he told himself, ignoring the tiny voice in his head that told him to go back to bed and wake Loki up. 

It had to be the necessity of being so close that was doing this to him. Had to be. He looked over at Loki, sleeping in the darkness, and back to his suitcase, digging around until he found the spying device, currently a mouse, and changing into a pair of jeans before slipping it into the pocket. 

* * *

After an hour of mindlessly wandering around the palace, Tony found himself in the dining room. When empty it looked even bigger, and he found himself feeling very small as he sat at the immense table, placing the mouse on it in front of him. He turned on the device with a flick of his fingers and the mouse sprung to life, sniffing the air and running around but never leaving Tony’s sight. 

Tony tried to focus on the mouse, tried to focus on anything, but the dream was too fresh in his mind for him to shake it off. The hardest thing to try to forget was just how much he could still feel it like it had actually happened. The sharpness of Loki's teeth on his lip, the sensation of hands in the back of his thighs, the way his horn had transformed from rough to smooth as Loki shifted back to an Asgardian. If it hadn't been so tactile, so real, maybe he could have put it out of mind. 

“Friend Tony!” came a voice from behind him, and Tony didn’t need to look to know it was Thor approaching from the hallway. Tony sat up a bit, scooping up the mouse and turning it off before placing it on the table in front of him. “What are you doing up so early? Does the kingdom of sleep elude you?” Thor came to his side and pulled out a chair, lowering his muscular frame into it with little grace. Despite the hour he was unbearably cheerful, and Tony thought he might have a headache coming on. 

“You could say that,” he responded wearily, trying to focus on the mouse again. He needed to talk to someone, but who was he going to admit something so private to? Knowing he should tell Janet didn’t make him want to do it, and given that his other best friend was Loki, he couldn’t very well say something to him about it either. Thor, of course, was out of the question. If necessary he supposed he could confide in J.A.R.V.I.S. but even talking to his AI about his conflicted feelings seemed impossible. 

“Ha!” Thor exclaimed and reached for the mouse where it sat on the table. Tony’s attention perked as Thor made the twisting hand motion to bring the mouse to life. “I haven’t seen one of these since I was a child! Where did you get it?” 

“Loki gave it to me. You’ve seen it before?” 

“Of course! I spent many an  hour playing with these--though mine were red and blue.” Thor pressed on the nose of the mouse, which dissolved into a puddle of golden liquid that swirled with an inner life. 

“You used to spy on people?” Tony asked incredulously. He expected it from Loki, but Thor? Tony couldn’t imagine Thor caring about people’s secrets, much less seeking them out. If he wanted to know something he’d ask outright, he often did so even when the answers would contain very sensitive information. 

“What?” Thor gave him a genuinely confused look as he wriggled his fingers above the liquid gold, and Tony watched in shock as the device changed into a miniature goat. 

If he was being honest with himself, Tony would admit he had suspected something wasn’t right about the device from day one. He might trust Loki sometimes, but there had always been a thread of doubt involving the Asgardian device Loki had used to bribe him. For one, he had never been able to figure out how it recorded and transmitted information, and while the chemical composition was fascinating, he hadn’t been able to reverse engineer anything out of it yet. 

“Why would I spy on people?” The goat capered around the table, making tiny noises when its hooves hit the wood. “I used to make Asgardian soldiers and frost giants and make them act out great battles,” he said with a hearty laugh. 

Something struck Tony then and his heart sank. “It’s a toy,” he said flatly.

Thor nodded and with a wave of his hand shifted the goat into a miniature salamander, the fire breathing kind. “Yes, I still have a box of them in my bedroom if you wanted another.” 

Getting to his feet, Tony picked up the salamander, feeling it wiggle against his palm. “No thanks,” he said as he began to leave the room. 

“Friend Tony, don’t you want breakfast? Though it is early it will begin to be served soon.” 

“No thanks,” he repeated. “Somehow I don’t feel very hungry.” 

* * *

This time, he was able to reach Loki’s rooms without a guide, and with every step he felt his anger grow. Though he had brought a tablet with him, he’d had no chance to study for finals. Without his workshop he couldn’t do anything to tune up the Iron Man suit, and worst of all, he had no idea how Stark Industries was doing without him. The stock could have plummeted, an industrial accident could have happened in the labs, or there could have been some kind of PR disaster and he couldn’t be there to fix it, much less know it was even happening. 

All because Loki had bribed him with a children’s toy. 

Loki’s door spat him out into the bedroom where Loki was nowhere to be found. Brunhilde was laying on the bed, contentedly chewing on one of Tony’s socks, and the dressing gown Loki had worn to bed was laid out neatly beside her. 

“Loki!” he shouted, storming across the room to look into the open closet. It was empty, the chair still knocked over from the night before. Gritting his teeth he looked at the door exiting the room, frustrated by the prospect of having to deal with the inscrutable manner of traveling through Loki’s rooms. Though he didn’t know where Loki was, he didn’t relish the idea of spending twenty minutes bouncing around from room to room while looking for him. Staring at the door, he said, “You’d better put me onto the balcony,” and walked through. 

To his surprise, he stepped out onto the balcony, a warm breeze washing over him as soon as his feet hit the shiny redwood floor. Bright, summery light came in from over the railing and he found Loki sitting at one of the tables, wearing black leggings and a well-fitting green vest. A bowl of fruit and pot of coffee sat on the table with him, and he glanced up at Tony when he arrived. 

“I’m having breakfast brought if you want something,” Loki said, pushing out the opposite chair with his foot and pointing to the empty cup. For the briefest moment, something told Tony to just sit down, have some coffee, and rationally talk about what was upsetting him. 

Then the salamander wriggled in his hand and he found himself walking across the room, squeezing the toy so hard that it stopped moving. 

“You lied to me,” he said through gritted teeth as he joined him at the table, taking the toy and slamming it down next to the empty cup. For a moment the salamander stayed still, then skittered behind the fruit bowl as if frightened of Tony’s hand. 

“Perhaps. You’ll have to be more specific than that, Anthony,” Loki said dryly, eyeing the toy. With a hint of obvious suspicion he asked, “How did you make it do that?” 

“I didn’t. Thor did.” 

“Ah.” Loki set down his coffee cup and laced his fingers on the table. “I’m surprised the oaf could even manipulate it.” 

The cold feeling in Tony’s chest grew as Loki simply looked up at him with inscrutable green eyes, his face placid. “You  _ lied _ to me! This whole time!” he shouted, and Loki flinched almost imperceptibly. “You told me this was some kind of technologically advanced spying device and it’s a  _ children’s toy _ ! It’s a fucking Asgardian Transformer!” Loki’s face fell, the mask slipping as a flicker of panic played over his features. 

“Compared to Midgardian technology it is still advanced enough that--” 

“I knew there was something off when you wouldn’t show me how it transmitted information.” Tony gritted his teeth, something occuring to him as Loki began to get to his feet. “I bet you can’t get me to the Destroyer either, can you?” 

Loki began to circle him, pacing slowly as he picked at the flesh of his left palm. “I can get you to the Destroyer, Anthony. You must believe me--” 

“How am I supposed to anymore?” Tony snatched the salamander off the table, turned it off, and stuck it into his pocket. 

“If you don’t believe that is of any use, I’ll take it back now,” Loki said flatly, but there was something akin to pleading in his voice that, if Tony hadn’t been so upset, he would have questioned. 

“It’s the only Asgardian thing I have. If I can get more data from it I’m going to research it until I do. You gave it to me, after all.” 

“I lent it to you.” Loki’s eyes flashed and he took a step forward, as if he meant to take the toy back from him by force, but Tony held up a hand, not backing away. 

“You didn’t tell me  _ that _ either. What else have you lied about, Loki?”

“Anthony, you’re being unreasonable. I promised you an object from which you could discern information about Asgardian technology and a trip to a place Midgardians never go. How have I lied about that?” 

“I never wanted to come!” His voice was louder now and he watched Loki set his jaw. “I told you that and you convinced me you could take me to one of the most powerful weapons in Asgard.” 

“And I will--” 

“You won’t! You got what you fucking wanted! You’re home! Good for you! But I don’t want to be here. And I don’t want to have to deal with one of my best friends constantly lying to me.” 

Loki held his chin high as he glared at Tony. “Listen to me. I stretched the truth, but I never lied to you. I told you  _ everything _ about this humiliating mess, and I gave you the only thing I was able to smuggle from Asgard--” 

Tony’s anger bubbled in his chest still as Loki tried to convince him. It was always like this, there was always some other lie to pile on top of the one that hadn’t worked, and with every word Tony’s exasperation grew. 

“You can’t talk your way out of everything, Loki! Not when I can’t trust you anymore.” 

“Go then!” Loki shouted, dropping his hands to his sides and balling his fists. “Go! Go tell Heimdall you want to go back to the Academy and you’ll be there in seconds.” Angry tears were beginning to well in Loki’s eyes, but Tony couldn’t help but wonder if he was doing it on purpose to try to garner sympathy. “He probably saw this coming anyway,” he muttered darkly. 

“You know what? I think I will. Have fun in Asgard.” Tony turned on his heel and went to leave, but was stopped by Brunhilde in the doorway. She wound around his legs, peeping urgently, until he stepped over her and exited the room. 


	13. Chapter 13

Much to Loki’s surprise and relief, Tony never left Asgard. He did, however, carry his things into one of Loki’s spare bedrooms once she told him they existed, and there was something sore in Loki’s chest when she woke up to an empty bed. Fake or not, she had to admit that it had been nice to have someone so close, but it seemed to her as if it was dangerous to get used to nice things. 

It had been three days since Thor had told Tony about the toy, and while Tony was still playing his part remarkably well, sitting next to Loki at meals and keeping close to her side when either Odin or Frigga was watching, in private they hadn’t exchanged a single word. When he looked at her, the betrayal in his eyes burned, and she found herself shrinking away instead of trying to argue him back into trusting her. 

What hurt the most was that this had happened the morning after he had held her in the closet as she cried, furious and wounded. After he had done with so few people ever did: see her for who she really was, no matter what she looked like. Tony saw her, really saw her, and there was a profound loss in having that taken away. His anger hung around her neck like a yoke and she could barely carry its weight. 

On the fourth day of not speaking to Tony, Loki was at a loss of what to do. Every scheme she invented died on her tongue and every apology felt like ash in her mouth. Feeling as lost as she ever had, Loki came to the conclusion that she had to talk to  _ someone _ , which is why she had invited Janet into her rooms. 

Janet easily slipped through the hidden doorway and onto the balcony while Loki sat on a chaise waiting for her, Brunhilde on her lap gently treading her thigh. 

“Oh!” said Janet upon seeing Loki. “You’re very femme today.” 

“Yes, she said absently as she stroked Brunhilde’s back. “It’s been a while since I felt this way, but all things change.” She leaned down a little to look at Brunhilde, who had peeped when Janet appeared, and her long hair tumbled down over her shoulders. Brunhilde stood up on her hind legs and bonked Loki on the chin. 

“You look really nice,” Janet said with a smile, and Loki knew that she meant it and, given what she was wearing, agreed that it was true.

“Thank you, but I didn’t bring you here to show off my dress.” But there was a part of her that beamed at the compliment. That morning Loki had slipped into a sleek, short, and black off the shoulder dress with a slit up the right side and gold rope trim around the hem. Had there been anyone other than Jan to notice, she was sure she would make one hel of an impression. “I need your help.” 

“Yeah, of course!” Janet crossed the balcony and grabbed a chair from one of the small tables, placing it across from Loki so she could face her. “What do you need?” 

“I...” She closed her eyes and took a deep breath, lifting Brunhilde to her shoulder where she rested her paws on Loki’s bare skin, digging her claws in slightly as she tried to bite her jangly gold earring.

Janet offered Loki a knowing nod. “He told me.” 

“Ah. I should have suspected as much.” 

“That was a jerk move, you know.” 

“Yes.” Loki released Brunhilde when she started to squirm and watched her take off running after a dragonfly buzzing low on the balcony. “I needed his help and I couldn’t risk the chance that he wouldn’t.” 

“You could have told him that.”

“I tried--” 

“You didn’t have to bribe him, he would have done it for you.” 

“He wasn’t listening to me, Jan.” Loki said, exasperation growing in her voice. “You have to understand how much this means to me. I’m home.” She glanced up at Janet through thick lashes, still hanging her head. “My mother thinks I’m happy. All I wanted to do was make her happy.” 

“You wanted to compete with Thor,” Janet said with a frown. “If you can’t even admit to yourself why you did this, how is Tony supposed to forgive you?” 

Loki glanced up, blinking in surprise. 

“I know you well enough to know you wanted me to help you apologize to Tony,” Janet said, standing up and moving to the chaise at Loki’s side. She wrapped her up in a one-armed hug, tugging her close as she rested her head against Loki’s arm. “I love you, you know that right?” 

Immediately, a lump rose in Loki’s throat and she swallowed it down before the tears could come to her eyes. Thinking on it, she couldn’t remember the last time someone other than Frigga had said that to her, and her chest ached with the desire to hear it again, to hear it from more than one person now and then. A crash came from their left and Loki glanced to see that Brunhilde had knocked a bowl of fruit off a table in her pursuit of the dragonfly. 

“And I want you to be happy,” Jan jumped a little at the noise, her attention leaving Loki for a brief moment, but returning as she continued. “But I don’t want you to think you have to lie to do so." 

Slowly, Loki put her arm around Jan too, leaning down to kiss her on the top of her head. “Janet,” she said softly, the lump returning to her throat. “I need you to talk to him. I need you to tell him that I’m sorry. That I only wanted...” The memory of Tony holding her, his hand on the back of her head as she cried into his shoulder came to her again and her chest felt tight. “I only wanted to be happy for a little while and I didn’t know how I was supposed to do that without...” 

Janet’s face softened a little, and she wrapped her tighter in the hug for a moment before releasing her. “I know he’s stubborn,” Janet said. “And I know he wasn’t willing at first, but you could have just told him what the toy was. He admitted he’s been able to get a lot of interesting data about its chemical composition. If you just suggested he might be able to do that, he probably would have listened.” 

“I couldn’t risk him saying no.” 

“Next time, just tell him the truth.” 

Loki let out a miserable sigh and released Jan. “What am I supposed to do now, though?” 

“Apologize.” 

“He’s not speaking to me, and he’s not going to listen unless I can give him something to make up for what I did.” 

“I think you’d be surprised.”

“No,” said Loki. “It has to be something. Some kind of gesture of goodwill. I told him he could see the Destroyer, but that’s never going to happen. It guards Odin’s vaults and getting down there is an impossibility.” She paused. “Most likely, if I tried I’d end up in the dungeons again.” A cold feeling poured down her as she tried not to remember the feeling of the walls closing in on her, tried not to remember the hours of desperately crafting exhausting illusions to make her feel like she wasn’t in an empty cell. They never helped. Nothing helped. The weight of that cell never left her. 

“You should tell him that.” 

“No,” Loki repeated, gently releasing Janet and getting to her feet, her boots clicking sharp against the hardwood floor. “I promised him that he could examine the uru and--” Her eyes widened. “I know what I need to do.” 

“I really think you should just apologize. No gimmicks, no lies.” Janet’s face was so earnest that Loki almost had to laugh. Despite Loki’s insistence that she was the Goddess of Mischief, she was still  _ known _ as the Goddess of Lies, and to have someone so genuinely believe she could accomplish something without lying was both laughable and invigorating at the same time. If  _ someone _ could believe she could change, maybe she had. 

“I intend to apologize,” she said with a smooth smile. “I just need to talk to my mother first.” 

* * *

Loki found Frigga in her gardens, surrounded by a half a dozen cats all draped contentedly in trees and on flagstones. A big, pink, hairless cat raised her head as Loki appeared with Brunhilde cradled in her arms. Brunhilde wriggled until Loki let her go, and made a beeline towards the other hairless cat, who licked her face vigorously when she arrived. 

“Loki,” Frigga said with a tender smile as she approached. “I’m so glad to see you.” With a pair of garden shears Frigga snipped a bud off of a lily and brought it to Loki, slipping it behind her ear. “You look beautiful.” She cupped Loki’s cheek and kissed her on the opposite one, and Loki threw her arms around her mother and held her until Frigga gently pushed her away. “To what do I owe the pleasure?” 

“I need to ask you for a favor,” Loki said as she watched Brunhilde wrestling playfully with a giant fluffy cat, her face lost in the fur as she tried to bite the other cat’s neck. 

“What kind of favor?” she asked, a small thread of suspicion running through her voice that made Loki’s heart sink. In the past she had given everyone, even her mother, reason to doubt her, and Loki had hoped that that doubt had been set aside since she changed. 

“I need to take Anthony to the dwarves of Nidavellir.” 

“Oh?” Frigga cocked her head before snipping a dead branch off of a flowering bush that looked vaguely like roses but with more petals and a different, heady scent. “That’s a big favor to ask, given that it would be an imposition to the dwarves to have an Asgardian and Midgardian suddenly appearing out of nowhere.” 

“I know that.” Loki crouched and pet one of the cats who had been winding around her legs. “I want Anthony to be able to get his hands on a piece of uru. I know it won’t be easy to convince the dwarves to give some up, but with uru he will be able to make significant improvements to his Iron Man suit.”  _ And maybe he’ll start speaking to me again _ , she thought. 

Frigga smiled tenderly. “You do adore him, don’t you?” 

Loki gave her mother a wan smile. “You could say that.” 

“Eitri won’t just give you a piece of uru, you know.” 

“I know.” Loki began to fiddle with the ring on her right hand, clearing her throat. “That’s why I was hoping I could borrow some gold from the treasury.” 

“You can  _ have _ some gold,” Frigga said to Loki’s surprise. “We have more than we could ever spend and all Odin does is horde it like a dragon, like Fafnir. And I think it’s fair to say that he owes it to you after the feast.” 

A thought struck Loki and tumbled out of her mouth before she could try to stop it. “Why do you stay with him?” 

A tired look came over Frigga’s face and she turned away from Loki, putting the shears into a basket that was full of other gardening tools and cut flowers. “You know why.” 

“You’d still be queen.” 

“He would likely exile me just as he has you,” said Frigga. “Here I have the ability to sway him in some aspects. I brought you home, didn’t I?” 

“Yes.” Loki moved to her mother to put her arms around her from the back. “You did.” 

Frigga did not turn around. “He is not always boorish and angry, you must understand that. There was a time when he was always charming and caring--” 

“Mother, please--” 

“And I still see that in him sometimes.” Frigga sighed lightly. “But we both know that time has changed him. If it were up to him you would likely never return, but I am able to convince him in some things. In many ways, I do not know what I would do without him, but in others...I fear with Asgard could become without my influence.” Her voice went cold for a moment, and Loki understood that the subject was closed. 

Loki pressed her face against her mother’s back for a moment in silence. Frigga gently pulled Loki’s arms from around her and turned to face her again. “I will give you gold, and I will order Heimdall to allow you to go to Nidavellir and back, but I must contact Eitri first and let him know you’re coming. You don’t just show up in someone’s realm without first getting permission from the king.” 

“Reasonable enough,” Loki said as she watched Brunhilde curl up with the other hairless cat. “Is that her mother?” The pink hairless cat once again began to groom Brunhilde, who rolled onto her side and gently kneaded her paws in the air. 

“Yes, and these are all her siblings.” 

“That one too?” Loki pointed to the odd one out, the massive fluffy one who now sat on the flagstones near Loki’s feet. 

“Yes. He comes from a different father.” 

“Would you mind watching her while I go? I don’t want to leave her alone in my rooms with nobody to take care of her.” It did always hurt to leave Brunhilde behind, but she would be safer in Frigga’s garden than in the mines of Nidavellir. 

“Of course.” Frigga crouched and scratched Brunhilde on the head. “Just give me a few hours to contact Eitri and gather the gold from the treasury. I will tell you when to meet me at the Bifrost.” 

“Thank you,” Loki said softly. “You have no idea what this means to me.” 

“Given how much Anthony means to you, I think I can guess.” 

* * *

Loki found Tony in the spare room she had given him, sitting on a leather sofa with an Iron Man gauntlet on his right hand, a screwdriver in the left. He was wearing jeans and a white tank top and Loki’s gaze lingered on his bare upper arms for the briefest of moments before jerking down to the rim of the arc reactor visible above the cotton. She blinked away from the stare and knocked on the doorframe. Tony glanced up briefly before turning his attention back to his work, then looking up again when it registered that Loki’s appearance had changed. His gaze lingered for a moment, as if he were waking up from his reverie of work and realizing the rest of the world existed again.  

“I know you, Anthony.” She leaned in the doorway as she watched a weary expression cross his face. “And while I know that you’re angry with me now, you won’t stay that way forever.” 

“Nothing lasts forever,” Tony said without looking up at her, focusing on tightening the screw that held the arc reactor to the palm of the gauntlet. “What do you want?” 

“I think I have something that will help you put me back in your good graces.” 

“No more tricks, Loki.” His voice was flat and tired, and she could hear exasperation creeping into it. 

“You wound me.” Loki placed her hand on her chest with dramatic flair. “As if I would do anything untoward and damage our wonderful friendship."

Tony’s eyes flicked up from the gauntlet as he offered her a long-suffering glare. 

“I can’t get you to the Destroyer,” she said, doing her best to make the apology sound as genuine as it actually was. Genuine came at a premium even when she tried. “Any attempt would end with me in the dungeons and you being immediately expelled from Asgard.” 

“I figured as much.”

“But.” She took a step away from the doorway to approach him, boots clicking on the marble floor, an eagerness growing in her chest as she began to weave what she hoped was a good enough story to get him to give her the attention he was now giving the gauntlet. “I can do you one better.” 

“Come on, Loki.” He slipped the gauntlet off his hand and placed it on the coffee table in front of him. The only emotions in his bright blue eyes were weariness and wariness, and Loki frowned slightly. “Can’t you just let it go? I stayed. I’m playing along.” 

“No, I don’t think so.” Loki moved smoothly to his side and sat, picking up the gauntlet he had removed. “What is this made out of? Iron?” 

“None of them have ever been iron. It’s just a name. This is made from a proprietary amalgam patented by Stark Industries.” He tried to take the gauntlet from her but she slipped it onto her hand, flexing the fingers. Tony gave her an odd look, his gaze bouncing from the glove to her eyes. “Don’t mess with that, you don’t know how to use it.” 

Ignoring him, she raised her hand in front of her as if to use the repulsor. Tony flinched, but nothing happened. The holographic Iron Man helmet appeared and J.A.R.V.I.S. began to speak. “You are not authorized to use the Iron Man suit,” he said dryly. “Perhaps later in your courtship, Tony will see fit to give you access, but he has not.” 

Tony grabbed her arm and wrestled the gauntlet off of her hand, putting it on the couch on the opposite side so she’d have to reach over his lap to get it. “There’s no courtship, J.A.R.V.I.S.,” he said with a light flush on his cheeks. Loki completely ignored the AI and continued to talk. 

“The reason I wanted to show you the Destroyer was so you could get a chance to really examine the uru. I know you’ve tried to study Mjolnir in the past, but the enchantment gets in the way of you really having the chance to do anything with it.” 

“Get to the point.” But a curious cast had come over his face and Loki felt a warm rush of pleasure under his gaze. 

“Instead of examining something someone else has made with uru, why not make something of your own?” she asked, leaning over him to reach the gauntlet, but he grabbed her bare wrist before she could. 

“What exactly are you offering?” he asked, eyeing her with a mixture of suspicion and interest as he tried to move her hand away from the gauntlet. Half a moment passed in silence as she leaned over him, glancing up from the gauntlet to his face, to his eyes, to his lips. Unbidden, the memory of looming over him in the kitchen came to her, the memory of his soft, parted lips, and the thought crossed her mind that she had  _ just so much  _ she could offer him. With some difficulty she shook off the fixation, but not before tracing the line of his bare neck to his collarbone. 

“I’m offering you a trip to Nidavellir and a piece of uru to call your own.” She smiled as his eyes lit up. “Uru is valuable and rare and takes the influence of someone like a Princess of Asgard to get ahold of.” She easily removed her arm from Tony’s grasp as she stood up, offering him a hand and a sly smile. “Anthony Stark, you will be the first Migardian to ever own a piece of uru. All you have to do is forgive me.” 

He raised a brow at her, looking at the offered hand. “Loki.” Though his tone almost sounded like a warning, the thread of interest was running through it like embroidery. 

“After you are certain that you will obtain the uru, of course. Now come with me. Eitri, King of Nidavellir, awaits our presence.” 

Warmth rushed through her as he took her hand, allowing her to help him stand as he grabbed the gauntlet from the side of the couch. “Are we supposed to go now?” he asked, glancing down at his clothes. “I’m not exactly dressed to meet a king.” 

“Your clothes are perfectly satisfactory,” she said, unable to stop herself from glancing again at his bare arms, though she looked away quickly, a feeling of growing excitement in her stomach. It was good that he was paying attention to her again. 


	14. Chapter 14

Heimdall stood in his observatory with Frigga at his side. She held a heavy-looking satchel over her shoulder, resting on her hip like a messenger bag. As Tony and Loki approached, she walked to her and took the bag off of her shoulder, transferring it to Loki’s. Tony gave the bag a suspicious glance and Loki smiled smoothly. 

“Goodwill alone gets you nothing. I would assume that a billionaire would understand that,” she said as she hefted the bag over her shoulder, opening it a little to peer at the gold bars inside. Tony got a glimpse and raised his brows. 

“You’re  _ buying _ the uru?” Discomfort crossed his face, but Loki only nodded. “I’m not sure I’m comfortable with this,” he said as he approached Heimdall. “I can buy my own if that’s what it takes.” 

“Midgardian money is of no use to the dwarves,” she said as Heimdall inserted his sword into the central sheath, a white, crackling light beginning to fill the room. “Think of it as my dowry. I’m certain my mother does,” she whispered, leaning in so as not to be heard by Frigga and Heimdall, and Tony’s cheeks went red. 

“Just say my name when you wish to return,” Heimdall said, addressing Tony. “My gaze will be upon you.” 

Tony thanked him, and in a flash they went from the golden floors of Heimdall’s observatory to the base of a mountain pass surrounded by magma. An oppressive heat surrounded them immediately and Loki felt sweat begin to pool in the small of her back. 

“You were right about the clothes,” Tony said, a thread of appreciation strung through his voice. She guessed he was thinking about how ill-suited a suit and tie would have been for the surroundings. “Are we in a volcano?” 

“We’re near one. The legendary anvil of the dwarves is inside the magma chamber of an inactive volcano. For all of their salt-of-the-realm folksiness they do love their drama.” Loki scoffed and adjusted the bag of gold on her shoulder. “Heimdall couldn’t have put us  _ in _ the forge, could he?” 

They began to walk together in the heat and sound of slowly burbling magma. 

“We shouldn’t be able to be here,” Tony said, lifting his right arm to hold the Iron Man gauntlet in the air, a complex data readout appearing in hologram. “It should be hot enough to boil us alive.” 

“You, maybe,” Loki said as they walked, feeling sweat rolling down her spine. “But no, it’s dwarven magic. They need the heat for their forge, but obviously they’d like to survive it as well.” 

“No metal needs to be  _ this _ hot to forge it.” 

“Uru isn’t just any metal.” 

“Yeah, you mentioned before that it’s living. What does that mean, exactly?” Tony glanced at her, turning off the holographic display. 

“It grows from the ground like a plant, but it’s very rare.” Loki pushed her hair off of her shoulder and created a folding fan out of thin air to fan herself with. “That’s why it’s not inert like, say, iron. That life is what makes it such a good vehicle for enchantments. It’s imbued with potential by its very nature, and enchantments and curses can take hold of that potential and grow it.” 

“That...doesn’t make a lot of sense.” Tony frowned. “What does ‘potential’ even mean in this context?” 

“Put it this way. There are metals that are better at carrying an electrical current than others, are there not?” she asked, and he nodded. “Think of enchantments and curses as a type of energy that uru conducts better than anything else in the realms.” 

Tony seemed satisfied by that explanation and they continued to walk until a massive castle cut into the stone began to take shape through the haze. Unlike the smooth, rounded motifs in shiny gold found in Asgardian architecture, the dwarven castle was as grey as the stone of the mountain it was carved from and made from nothing but hard edges. Every angle was dagger sharp, yet the structure looked like it might have come into being when the plates collided to make the mountain itself.

“So I guess we were right about dwarves, huh?” Tony asked. 

“Whatever do you mean?” 

“Mining, forging, living underground. Every single piece of popular media depicts dwarves like this.” He cocked his head to the side. 

“Of course not,” she scoffed. “There are forest dwarves, plains dwarves, and beach dwarves as well, it’s just that the king happens to be of the forging sort.” A droplet of sweat rolled from her collarbone to between her breasts and she fanned herself harder. “Really funny, Heimdall,” she said, addressing the sky. “Really funny.” 

He glanced over at her, and an almost imperceptible soft look came over his face. Loki only recognized it for a split second and she watched him curiously as he began to speak. “I meant to say something about this, you know,” he said, gesturing to Loki. 

“About my dress? Why, thank you, Anthony, for recognizing class when you see it.” 

“I mean, it’s a great dress, but I meant you. I didn’t want you to think that I was so bad at paying attention that I didn’t notice.” He paused for a moment. “So is this a long-term thing?” 

Internally she beamed at the compliment. “Who knows? And you’re not obligated to acknowledge every time I change.” She shifted the bag on her shoulder, and Tony glanced at it when she did so. “But I do prefer being acknowledged to not being spoken to,” she said pointedly. 

“Hey, you lied to me,” he said pointedly, though his face was calmer than it had been the last time he pointed that out. 

“Which is why everyone calls me the Goddess of Lies, no matter what I say or do.” Letting out an exasperated groan she began to pick up the pace. “Why are we not at the damnable castle yet?”

“You can’t teleport us there, or something?” 

She cocked her head like a curious dog, then shook it. “Probably not. I haven’t been there before so it would be a...what do Midgardians call it? A crapshoot. We’d be just as likely to end up in the magma as in the throne room.” 

“Maybe that’s why Heimdall didn’t put us in there?” Tony suggested. 

“Ha, no. Heimdall sees  _ everything _ . We could have easily been placed at Eitri’s side, but, as always, Loki must be punished,” she finished darkly. “I’m going to have a talk with my mother as soon as we get back.” 

“Speaking of your mother, that bag she gave you. How much gold is in there?” he asked, gesturing to Loki’s bulging satchel. 

“Oh, who knows. A lot.” Loki shook the bag a little. “I don’t know how much gold is worth on Midgard or I’d give you an estimate.” She stopped and opened it up, showing Tony the dozens and dozens of gold bars. 

Tony glanced from the bag to Loki’s face. “How are you carrying all of that? Gold is really heavy.” 

“Is it? I barely notice it.” 

Making an estimate based on what he could see Tony eyed Loki curiously. “That’s gotta be like five, six hundred pounds of gold. Exactly how strong  _ are _ you?” 

Loki lifted a hand to her chin and tapped her lips with her forefinger. “I know nothing about Midgardian weights and measurements outside of cooking. But, I could probably lift that tank we commandeered from Hydra. Maybe. Probably,” she decided. 

“ _ You _ ? I mean, I would believe that Thor could, but--” 

“Do not compare me to my brother.” Loki’s voice was cold. “I can give you a demonstration when we get back, if you need one, but understand that Asgardians are incredibly strong compared to Midgardians. Even ones like me,” she added, then eyed him. “You know very little about Asgardians, don’t you?” 

Tony shrugged. “I’ve never really thought about it.” 

“Well, given we have the time.” Loki manifested a hair tie and used it to gather her hair into a bun, getting it off the back of her neck. “For one, I’m not speaking English.” She couldn’t be certain, but she thought his gaze might have lingered on the line of her neck and collarbone for a moment before meeting her eyes. 

“What?” An incredulous look crossed Tony’s face and Loki watched as that look of trying to figure something out worked through his features. 

“All Asgardians speak Allspeak, we understand all languages and you hear us as though we’re speaking yours.” Loki stretched her arms over her head, an audible crack coming from her shoulder. “If I was surrounded by people who spoke different languages, they’d all be able to understand me. Additionally--” 

Before she could continue, a sound of something moving across stone could be heard and she reached out a hand, her scepter appearing in it as she looked warily up the path. 

“Do we need to be worried about that?” Tony asked, glancing from the scepter to the path. 

“I have no idea what to expect here,” Loki admitted, but presently the sound grew louder and it became obvious that it was of horse hooves on stone. “But perhaps we’re coming up on the welcome wagon.” 

Two warhorses became visible through the haze and Loki let out a relieved sigh as she noticed the utilitarian coach being driven by a dwarf with a long, red and grey beard that was braided in multiple places, beads worked into braids. 

“Loki of Asgard, Anthony Stark of Midgard,” the dwarf began as she slowed the horses to a stop. “King Eitri awaits you...and thinks you’re being kind of slow,” she said with a grin. 

“Take it up with Heimdall,” Loki said as she climbed into the coach and set the bag of gold on the seat beside her. It was cooler inside than it was on the path and she heaved a thankful sigh as she fanned her sweaty neck. Tony sat opposite her and rested back against the wall of the coach, pinching the neckline of his tank top and peeling it away from his skin, the arc reactor casting ghostly light in the dark coach when it was semi-uncovered. 

Moments passed in silence as the dwarf driving the coach urged the horses on and they began to tear down the path towards the castle. Loki stared at Tony’s face lit by the arc reactor and her head felt heavy.  

“I really...do owe you an apology for all of this,” she began, a tightness in her chest as she forced the words. “The uru is a gesture of goodwill but, I suspect you want the words as well.” The importance of his forgiveness had grown exponentially from the moment they had fallen out, and it had eaten at her in an uncomfortable manner for days. “I don’t like making myself vulnerable, not even to you, but I was wrong.” She sighed through her nose. “Is that satisfactory?” 

“If you mean it,” Tony said, his face sincere but firm as he looked into her eyes. 

“I’m trying to be a better person,” Loki said and looked away from him, gazing out of the window of the coach. “I’ve  _ been _ trying to be a better person for a while now.” She turned to offer him a lopsided grin. “It would seem I’m not good at everything.” 

“How humble of you.” Tony seemed to grow nervous under the weight of her gaze. “I do have to admit that being in Asgard isn’t horrible. I would have liked to make the decision on my own, but I’m not miserable or anything.” 

“That’s good,” she replied, almost surprising herself with how genuine she sounded. “I’d rather you not be.” A sort of nervous smile played itself over Tony’s face and he turned to look out the window of the coach. 

Some time passed in silence as the dwarf drove the horses back to the castle and Loki closed her eyes, resting her head back against the wall, almost falling asleep. When she sat up and looked around she found that Tony had been staring, and his gaze flicked away as soon as she noticed it. Curiosity bloomed in her mind, but she tamped it down. They were here for one thing, and whatever was keeping Tony’s eyes on her could wait until later. 

When they arrived, they were escorted not to the throne room, but rather down winding passages under the earth where the heat got more oppressive. The walls changed from smooth carved stone to natural rocky formations. Before long, the forge became visible, a massive structure with an immense but low anvil--apparently short enough for a dwarf to work on despite its width and girth. Standing before the anvil was a dwarf with long white hair tied back into a braided ponytail and a beard to match. He wore plain clothing with a leather apron over it and signaled for Loki and Tony to approach when he saw them enter. 

“Loki Laufeysdottir,” he said with a cluck of his tongue, his gaze suspicious as Loki and Tony drew near. “Never thought I’d see you in my realm again.” 

“Ah, well. I do so love the atmosphere,” she said, brushing wispy hair that wouldn’t stick in the bun off of her forehead. “And, if you please, Loki of Asgard.” 

Ignoring her, Eitri turned his attention to Tony. “And the Midgardian. Welcome to Nidavellir.” While the dwarf was short in speech he wasn’t unkind, just businesslike, a manner that slipped slightly as approval crossed his face when Loki opened the satchel to show him the contents. 

“Thank you, your highness,” said Tony, watching the stilted interaction between Loki and Eitri. 

“Haven’t had a Midgardian here in, oh, who knows?” Eitri shrugged as he took the bag from Loki. “Well. You’re certainly determined, aren’t you?” he asked, looking from the gold to Loki’s semi-patient face. “You know how difficult it is to obtain uru, don’t you?” 

“I do, which is why the Asgardian court is being so generous in our efforts to obtain it. I’m certain you’ll find the gold satisfactory, and if you need any more incentive, how about I promise not to darken your doorstep again, hmm?” At that, Tony eyed Loki curiously and Eitri rolled his eyes. 

“I must admit I’m surprised to see you and not already trying to steal something.” Eitri closed the satchel and placed it beside him on the ground. “So, Anthony, right?” he addressed Tony. 

Tony nodded, but added, “You can call me Tony.” 

“Tony it is, then. Let me show you what you’ve come for,” Eitri pointed to the anvil, upon which sat a piece of dull, unremarkable metal the size of a golf ball. Tony’s face fell a little. 

“That’s not much,” he said, and Loki gritted her teeth together for a moment at his ignorance. 

“Uru can be pounded as thin as a sheet of paper,” Loki offered, glancing at Eitri who, despite his apparent distaste for Loki, appeared impressed with her knowledge. “You can’t make a whole suit out of it, no, but a gauntlet I’m sure is possible.” 

“It would cost every gold coin in Asgard for a piece bigger than this,” Eitri said as he led Tony to the anvil. “There’s only so much of it and we need it for our own weapons and armor. With the threat of dark elves always looming, we can’t be too careful.” 

“Malekith is making moves into the other realms again?” asked Loki with mild alarm. 

“Oh, aye,” Eitri said as he picked up a large hammer and a pair of tongs to hand them to Tony. “We find more dark elf scouts on the outskirts every day.” 

“That is disconcerting,” Loki said, looking around at the bare chamber from its forge to the magma boiling around them. “I don’t think I’d be lucky enough to get a chair, would I?” she asked flatly. 

“Make one,” Eitri said with a scoff, and stepped back from the forge. “I’ve been told you’re a blacksmith,” he addressed Tony now. “Show me what you can do.” 

“Well, I’m more of an engineer, but I do know my way around a forge.” A confident smile crossed Tony’s features as he used the tongs to place the uru into the molten forge. 

While he worked, Loki summoned a dining chair from the ether to sit down and watch. Eitri and Tony began to discuss techniques for working with the metal, and Loki felt her mind drift as her gaze fell on Tony. The heat was clearly getting to him just as much as it was to her; his hair was plastered to his head and she could see his skin through his sweat-drenched tank top. 

Something came over Loki as she watched him and she dragged her gaze from his wet shirt to the curve of his collarbone where it led into his shoulder. Tony wasn’t muscle-bound like Thor or say, Steve Rogers, but his slim arms did have a fair amount of strength behind them, as was evident when he lifted the hammer with one hand to give it a practice swing. The cords stood out in his forearms and Loki found herself staring. 

Eitri and Tony paid her no attention now; it was as if she wasn’t even there, and for a moment that was fine with Loki. A drop of sweat rolled from behind Tony’s ear, down his neck, before soaking into the strap of his wet tank top, and Loki traced that trajectory with her eyes, starting to feel the barest stirring of desire as she had the sudden thought that she’d like to lick that trail of sweat. 

Tony removed the uru from the forge and placed the red hot metal onto the anvil. With a quick consultation with Eitri, he lifted the hammer and brought it down with a solid clang. Watching him with a hammer left her feeling an unpleasant twist in her stomach, but that feeling was overridden by a wash of unbidden, inappropriate thoughts. 

There was something sensual in the way Tony’s body moved as he worked, in the strong swing of the hammer, coming down with clear precision in every motion. She had seen Tony working on things before, and while his single-minded focus and talent was sometimes interesting, she had never seen him like this. The sweat, the concentration, the way his body moved with every swing of the hammer, something about it was making her mind wander into dangerous territory. 

She realized, almost belatedly, that there was a familiar ache between her legs and she felt a slickness beginning to slip between her lips. There was no denying that Tony was an attractive man. He wouldn’t have the amount of women fawning over him that he did if he wasn’t, but the answer as to whether that acknowledgement of his attractiveness was actually leading to attraction was becoming evident as she felt a throbbing between her legs sync in time with every swing of the hammer. 

Loki watched in a haze, halfway baffled by her body’s reaction, though the reason seemed obvious when he grabbed the bottom of his tank top to peel it up and rub his eyes with the fabric, his entire chest becoming visible. A peal of desire hit her as if someone had rung a bell in her ear. 

Tony had been topless around her before. They’d been to the beach together, so she knew to expect a fair amount of hair on his lower belly and the intense amount of scar tissue surrounding his arc reactor. But right now his jeans were low on his hips and she could see the lines of his iliac furrow trailing in a tantalizing downward curve. And there was something about that scar tissue, something that was attractive in its own way, something that drew her eye and held it while his chest was visible. It was always impressive that he had survived that, and that she was gazing at him, at the arc reactor that kept him alive, she wondered why she was so drawn to him in that moment. 

She thought of his lips again, of the way they parted for her and how she’d squandered the chance, and how his body was malleable to her touch when she wanted it to be, and in those thoughts another came, strong as the sound of the hammer on the anvil. 

She wanted him underneath her. 

Maybe right here, even, if Eitri would just leave, she could hold him down and sit on his face and feel his tongue moving between her aching wet lips and that thought struck her in the belly with heat and surprise and the tiniest thread of dismay. No matter what her body was screaming for at the moment, there was no excuse for the desire, not when she had already coerced him into coming to Asgard. But she knew she could so easily mold him like putty and that knowledge burned sweetly between her legs. 

Though the sweat was still making her miserable, her senses were focused lower now, to the ache and the slickness and the feeling of both need and relief when she squeezed her legs together. She had the thought of asking Eitri where the restroom was so she could go and rid herself of this desire, but instead she crossed her legs and continued to watch. It was awful in the best kind of way, her mind an unfocused jumble while her body knew exactly what it needed. 

Maybe, just maybe, if he was lucky enough, she could ride him, she could tell him not to touch her unless she said so, and she  _ knew _ he’d listen because he liked to be pushed, and oh, by the realms, she could push him. 

Finally she tore her gaze away from him, guilt settling into her just as obviously as the pool of wetness that was soaking through her underwear and into her skirt underneath. He was one of her best friends, one of her only friends, and it would be so easy to take advantage of him and that was the last thing she wanted. Even while assaulted by unbidden fantasy, she clung to the fact that his friendship was dear and desperately needed, and knew just how easily she could ruin it. 

Loki swallowed hard as the sound of hammering rang thick in the chamber around her. Occasionally Eitri would tell Tony to stop and they would have a conversation that Loki could hear, but didn’t register. Something about how to properly work the metal, about how it could sometimes move on you if you weren’t careful about where you struck the hammer, how that inner life made it both hardy and delicate, and how it needed a precise touch. But from what Loki could tell, Eitri was doing nothing but praising Tony, and she watched the pleased flush rise on his face at his pride. 

Loki ached, and was thankful that today she had woken up a woman and didn’t have to hide the signs of her desire. Instead she squeezed her thighs again and sunk into the private torment that had her closing her eyes to bring up the mental picture of his bare chest, of his scar tissue and small, pink nipples and how nice it would be to have one of them in her mouth, between her teeth. 

“Is this going to take much longer?” she heard herself ask, her voice thick, and both Tony and Eitri glanced at her as if only just then noticing that she was here. 

“Aye,” answered Eitri, eyeing her with irritation. “It’s a delicate process and takes a fair amount of time. You could go upstairs and ask one of the servants for a book or something if you’re that bothered.”

With a huff, Loki made a complicated sign in the air and the chair morphed into a chaise lounge with a book sitting at her side. “Thank you for the offer, but I have my own reading material.” She laid down, trying and failing to ignore her heart racing when Tony met her eyes. Opening the book, she tried to find the words and couldn’t. It was just pages full of squiggly lines that her brain refused to focus on, instead wondering what his face would look like when she ran her tongue up his iliac furrow, up his belly, over a nipple and to his neck where she could leave marks that would stay for days as a reminder of what she’d done to him. 

Stifling a frustrated groan she placed the book over her face and pretended to go to sleep. 

Getting him out of her sight helped, though her imagination was enough to keep her desire burning if she let it. But thankfully, blissfully, the heat and the dark when she covered her eyes actually lulled her into half sleep despite the ringing of the hammer. And while she wasn’t necessarily tired, she would take anything at the moment to forget the throbbing between her legs. 

Amazingly, Loki actually slept for a while, having mundane dreams that didn’t really stick with her when she woke up. Her clit still ached and she was still soaked through her skirt, but the river rush of thoughts had left her and what remained was the guilt and uncertainty. She sat up to watch Tony put on a new gauntlet, this one made from uru and scraps taken from the old one. Unlike the flashy red and gold of the Iron Man suit, this gauntlet was a dull grey, but it was made with remarkable delicacy. The fingers were articulated with tiny overlapping plates, and when he moved his arm around Loki could tell his dexterity was greater that it had been in the previous gauntlet. Having seen the piece of uru he had begun with, Loki was impressed by what he’d actually been able to do. With a piece twice that size he could have possibly made the torso for the suit. 

“This is amazing,” she heard him say as he flexed his fingers in the gauntlet. “The energy readings are off the charts, and that’s without using a different power source. It’s just the metal!” Excitedly he held up the glove as if to fire off a repulsor blast, but lowered it before he actually did so. He thanked Eitri heartily, and Eitri for his part, told Tony it had been a pleasure to work with a real craftsman and that he was welcome in Nidavellir any time. 

Tony approached Loki where she had sat up and leaned over the side of the chaise. “It looks like we’re pretty much finished here,” he said, showing her the gauntlet. She stood and suddenly froze as he wrapped his arms around her in a tight hug. “You’re definitely forgiven,” he said with a smile, and her stomach sunk with guilt. 

Why couldn’t she just have what she wanted?

“Heimdall!” she called, though she knew he could hear her without raising her voice. “Heimdall, we’re ready to come home.” 

For a moment nothing happened and she stared at the ceiling in dismay. Then, instantaneously, they were in Heimdall’s observatory, and the comparatively cool air of the Asgardian night rushed over her in a wave of relief. After having a small argument with Heimdall about where he had placed them in Nidavellir and getting stonewalled, she began to lead Tony back to the palace, relieved to leave Nidavellir and the forge behind her. 

But she still ached. That was evident and uncomfortable and with Tony at her side she found she couldn’t say a word to him out of fear of what she might say. So they as they walked together, she only nodded as Tony rattled off a long explanation of how he’d managed to put the pieces together with the limited tools, and what kinds of things he was going to be able to do with it now that he had so much extra power. When she returned to her rooms she laid flat on her back on her bed, staring at the ceiling, refusing her body release as she tried to sleep without thinking about Tony. 

She failed. 


	15. Chapter 15

Forgiving Loki had been easier than Tony had thought it would be. It wasn’t just the uru, though that had been an incredible gift that had enhanced the power of his gauntlet exponentially, it was that Loki had, for once, been entirely and genuinely apologetic. His sincerity was new and Tony, having learned that Loki was actually capable of doing something with no ulterior motive, found himself having the odd tender thought about his best friend. 

In fact, Tony was finding himself having a  _ lot _ of new and different thoughts about Loki, especially given that, since the night in his bed, the dreams hadn’t stopped. If anything, they had gotten more intense, and while they weren’t necessarily unpleasant, there was something like dismay in knowing that, even though he went to bed alone, he wasn’t going to stay that way in his dreams. 

Loki was always there. Loki the frost giant, Loki the Asgardian, Loki, male and female. Loki who, somehow, knew his darker fantasies. Loki who held him down and bit his neck so hard that in the morning, despite knowing it was a dream, he almost expected to find a mouth shaped bruise when he looked in the mirror. There was a small, but undeniable part of him that looked forward to these dreams, and there was guilt in the threads of excitement that sometimes came over him before he fell asleep. 

Occasionally, to try and give himself a reprieve from the dreams, he just didn’t go to sleep until he was so exhausted he couldn’t stay up anymore. He would study--finals were still happening, after all--or work on the new glove, as there seemed to be no end to the power he could draw from the uru and utilizing that power took adjustment and skill and time. But this night, neither physics nor tinkering could keep his mind occupied, so he decided to take a stroll around the palace and use the gauntlet to continue mapping it out. 

The Asgardian palace was bigger than Tony thought he would be able to explore in the short time he was visiting. Even though he spent a majority of the week and a half he had been there in the palace, he had still only seen a relatively small portion. Part of this was because there were plenty of rooms he and Janet weren’t allowed to go in, but mostly it was because the palace felt like it was the size of dozens of shopping malls stacked on top of one another. 

So as not to get lost, Tony had J.A.R.V.I.S. trace his every step whenever he left Loki’s rooms. He had tried to have J.A.R.V.I.S. do the same with Loki’s rooms, but his strange teleporting doors made it unmappable. With enough time, Tony thought he might be able to figure out the technology behind them, but for the moment they were inscrutable. 

Having walked about a mile and a half or so, Tony found himself in a new part of the palace. It was an art gallery that felt bigger than the Louvre. Lining the walls were paintings of every subject. There were beautiful, alien landscapes with non-Euclidean geometry and others that looked just as familiar as any pastoral scene painted on Earth. There were paintings of animals of every kind; Tony recognized a salamander from Odin’s study, and it was surrounded by strange fiery creatures that Tony assumed came from the realm of fire Loki had told him about. There were unicorns and griffins, lions and gazelles, all sorts of animals both real and mythological. He wondered, as he stopped in front of a painting of a unicorn, if they actually existed in Asgard. It wouldn’t surprise him. 

As he walked, he found a long display case made of dark wood and glass and he stopped in front of it, gazing at the objects inside. He expected something glorious, glamorous, given the way the paintings were all kept in gilt frames, but all that was in the cases was a bunch of what looked like very primitive statues carved from wood and stone. As he looked them over he realized they must be depictions of the royal family. Horns adoring some of the figures resumbled Odin’s bull-horned helm, while at least one had the long, curving beetle horns of Loki’s full helm. He wondered where these had come from, and it struck him that these had perhaps been some kind of offerings from the Vikings, who had worshipped the Asgardians as gods. He scanned them with his gauntlet before moving on. 

After some time exploring the gallery, he came to an alcove offset by golden columns that was full of paintings of Odin, Frigga, Thor, and Loki. The paintings depicted the royal family at all ages, and they were masterfully done. The likenesses were incredible and he found himself staring at childhood paintings of Thor and Loki. Loki, especially, intrigued him. It was like the Asgardian equivalent of visiting a friend’s house and having their mom pull out the photo album to show all of the childhood photos, except instead of skinned knees and missing teeth, Loki’s portraits were all idealized, with not a hair out of place, much less a gap-toothed smile. 

Even in these perfectly posed paintings, Thor still crackled with energy, appearing as though he was ready to jump out of the frame at any moment. His hair was always a little mussed, and occasionally he had a scrape here and there. Loki, on the other hand, was immaculate, the consummate little prince, posing for the portraits in a manner that made him look still and regal, his chin held high, his green eyes fixed on the artist. 

In the center of the alcove was a life-size portrait of the royal family, painted when Loki and Thor were whatever the Asgardian equivalent of ten years old was. Odin and Frigga were standing behind their children, Odin’s hand on Thor’s shoulder, while Frigga had a hand on them both. Both children were holding toys. Thor had a great red ogre with a face roaring in rage, while Loki held a tiny gold snake. Reaching into his pocket, Tony pulled out the golden toy, wondering if it was the exact same one as in the painting. 

“My goodness,” said a gentle, quiet voice from behind him, and when Tony turned it was to see Frigga standing behind him. She wore a diaphanous dressing gown and her hair was loose around her shoulders. “I haven’t seen that in centuries.” 

Tony held up the toy, offering it to her, and when she took it from him she brought it alive and changed it into the same snake as in the portrait. “This was always Loki’s favorite. I thought I’d never see it again.” 

“He said it was the only thing he was able to smuggle out of Asgard when he was exiled,” Tony said, curiously watching the small snake wind its way around Frigga’s fingertips. “But he uh, also didn’t tell me it was a toy.” 

“Oh, this is more than a toy,” Frigga said as she handed it back to Tony. “It is,” she paused, a conflicted look crossing her face as she seemed to decide whether or not she should continue. “It is the only thing I was able to salvage the first time he was sent to the dungeons. Odin removed everything else.” 

Something struck Tony in the chest as he looked down at the toy, his lips parted slightly in surprise. “Do you mean to say that Odin threw out everything of Loki’s?” 

“Oh yes.” Her voice was cold now and Tony was taken aback. “Every childhood toy. Every scrap of clothing. Even the furniture was taken from his room and repurposed around the palace.” Her mouth was a thin white line, and Tony could guess how much she had approved of Odin’s actions. “Do not say a word of this to Odin,” she said with a sigh, composing herself gracefully. 

“Of course not. I would never.” He didn’t look up from the toy, though he turned it off when it coiled up into a neat spiral. “What...what happened to Loki’s things when Odin got rid of them?” Tony cringed at a flash of memory of Howard screaming at him to pick up his goddamn toys before he threw them away. 

“Burned,” she said shortly, a flash of fury crossing her face for the briefest moment, just long enough for Tony to see the anger in her eyes. “All of it, all but this.” 

A lump started to rise in Tony’s throat as he remembered the day he had found out it was a toy. How he had slammed it against the table like a piece of garbage. The look on Loki’s face when he asked for it back. “Christ,” Tony muttered. “What did he  _ do _ ?” 

Frigga seemed conflicted, but after a moment she spoke. “He murdered several of the guards. We never found out why.” She watched as a stricken look crossed over Tony’s face. “I have always believed that Loki is worthy of redemption,” she said, her voice tender but firm. “And it seems as though he has proved me right.” Frigga moved to stand at Tony’s side. “He truly adores you,” she said with a gentle smile, and Tony felt heat begin to rise on his cheeks. “It is hard for me to reconcile the Loki from the past with the one I see today, and I do think your influence has helped shape him into a better person.” 

“I wouldn’t go that far,” Tony said with an awkward chuckle. 

“Well, not just you. Janet too, and I’m sure he has other friends at the Academy. I believe his time on Midgard has humbled him to an extent, and though I know he is furious to be exiled, I believe that anger has not taken him over the way it used to.” Tony thought he heard her voice waver slightly. “It seems as though he is the person I’ve always known he could be, and it does my heart good to see him happy.” 

Even after over a week and a half in the palace it was still a wonder to hear Frigga talk about Loki. Though she clearly had enough of a realistic outlook about her child to know he wasn’t a saint, she loved him terribly and completely. Being separated from his mom must have been a special kind of hell for Loki, and Tony could understand, just a little more, why being on Earth was so frustrating for him. He would have given anything to see his mother again, to hear her talk about him the way Frigga talked about Loki. 

It was then that he yawned. The walk to the gallery and the forty-five minutes he had spent there seemed to have been enough to wear him out. He found himself wishing he hadn't walked so far, knowing he had over a mile to return to Loki's rooms. But it would knock him out, he figured, and maybe that would be enough to hold the dreams at bay for a night. Tony politely excused himself from Frigga and returned to his rooms. Before making it into to spare bedroom Loki had given him, his door spat him out in Loki's room, the sconces dim enough for him to see Loki stretched out and sleeping on his huge bed. He paused for a moment to look at Loki’s hair splayed out on the pillow, his lean body half under the covers, a pale, naked leg visible, suggesting that whatever he was wearing had no bottom. A compulsion came over him. It didn’t matter that he had his own room, he wanted to climb into bed with Loki. It wasn’t even so much the desire to touch him, just to be near him, and Tony felt a brief jitter of butterflies in his stomach. 

Immediately, he turned and went back through the door, ending up on the balcony and in a library before finding his own room again. Without changing he climbed into the bed, trying to tell himself that the desire in Loki’s bedroom was just some kind of residual feeling left over from the dreams when he woke up. That was all. Just his brain confusing subconscious for conscious, and he was smart enough to know the difference. That’s what he told himself as he began to drift off, thinking about physics equations to help him keep his mind on anything but Loki. 

* * *

It didn’t work. Within the hour he was up again and navigating the teleporting doors to get back to Loki’s bedroom. That compulsion had been too strong to resist, and once he found himself back in Loki’s room he immediately climbed into bed with him, slowly and carefully as to not wake him up. He knew it would be confusing for Loki to wake up with him in bed, but he didn’t care. He wasn’t going to be able to sleep otherwise. 

Making himself comfortable, he faced the wall, taking one of the extra pillows and wrapping his arms around it. Able to relax now, he closed his eyes and began to drift off. But before he could fall asleep he felt the bed moving beside him, and as Loki drew near, a mixture of guilt and excitement rose in his stomach, making its way to his chest where he felt his heart begin to race. 

“I knew you’d come to me,” Loki said in a murmur that almost sounded smug. “I’m just surprised it took you so long.” Tony turned to see Loki sitting on his heels on the sheets beside him, and realized that the reason his leg had been bare was that Loki was sleeping naked. He tried to place his gaze somewhere other than Loki’s body and failed miserably, devouring the slim lines of his chest and belly, the way his hair tumbled over his bare shoulders, and, of course, trailing his gaze down his stomach, past his iliac furrow, to see his cock half-hard between his legs. 

“Loki, I--” An apology tried to stumble its way out of his lips but was silenced by Loki’s mouth. He had drawn close to Tony, stifling him with a firm kiss that he used to slip his tongue into Tony’s mouth when his lips parted. Tony reached for him as he leaned over, him cupping his cheeks while they kissed, his heart racing so fast that he was almost concerned about its pace. He didn’t need a second thought to understand how much he wanted this, how long he’d wanted this, and besides, rational thought left him when Loki’s hand slid over his belly and over his jeans, stroking his cock through them. 

“Want you,” he managed to murmur before Loki silenced him again, this time with teeth on his lip and a firm squeeze of his cock. It had taken him no time to get hard and he desperately wanted to get out of his jeans. He fumbled with them, but Loki grabbed his arms and pulled them over his head, shaking his head no. 

“Come here,” Loki said firmly, releasing his arms and moving to lay on his back next to him, one arm behind his head on the pillow. Tony swallowed hard, drawing closer to Loki, stroking one hand down his side, his impossibly soft skin over lean, firm muscle, until he reached his soft belly and his cock, laying hard and blood-flushed on his stomach. Loki let out a small contented noise but grabbed Tony by the chin and rubbed his bottom lip with his thumb. “No hands.” 

“Anything you want,” he heard himself say, and he moved down Loki’s body, his tongue on his skin as he trailed his way down to his cock. It had been a while since he’d done this, and he desperately hoped he wasn’t too out of practice as he nuzzled into Loki’s iliac furrow before drawing his tongue in a long line over the length of Loki’s cock. He kept his hands behind his back, excitement pouring through him at the sensation of smooth, hot skin against his tongue and a rush of desire dropped from his stomach to his cock, straining against the zipper of his jeans, when Loki made a small, contented noise in his throat. 

In that moment, all he wanted was to draw that noise from him again, and without hesitation he took Loki’s cock into his mouth. As soon as he did he felt Loki’s hand on the back of his head, giving him a gentle push downwards, and Tony made himself pliable, allowed Loki to push as he quickly opened his mouth further and adjusted himself to make room for Loki’s cock filling his mouth. His gaze flicked up to watch Loki watching him, his face calm and perhaps a little amused. Tony wanted to break down that facade, to see him lose it and react without thinking, and after the weight of his gaze began to make him feel too exposed, he closed his eyes and focused all of his attention on Loki’s cock. 

With fingers tight in his hair, Loki held his head still as he thrust into his mouth. Pinpricks of desire struck him everywhere, converging on his cock as he felt Loki’s against the back of his throat. This was his favorite part, feeling like his partner might go too far, too fast, too hard. So what if he gagged a little? He didn’t want to be treated gently. He relaxed, best that he could in the situation, and opened his eyes again to catch a glimpse of Loki’s lips parted, his chest rising fast with his hastened breath. A certain sense of excited pride bloomed in his chest as he watched Loki throw his head back and groan as he took his cock into his throat. 

Loki’s fingers tightened in his hair so tightly that it hurt, and that pain sent a shiver down his spine. He kept his hands behind his back, holding one wrist, even if it kept him slightly off balance as he bent over because it didn’t matter--Loki’s grip was enough to keep him still. 

It was over too fast. With every thrust Loki’s cock had gone a little deeper, and every centimeter left Tony’s cock throbbing harder in his jeans. While Tony was ready to continue until his jaw hurt, he felt his head yanked backwards as Loki, with a moan and a breathless whisper of Tony's name, came in his mouth, his hips jerking in small, erratic motions, until his body went limp and he released Tony’s hair. And oh, that whisper made him want so much more. 

Releasing his wrist, Tony sat back, propping himself up with his arms to watch Loki as the flush left his cheeks and his breath slowed. 

“Get up here,” Loki said in what was nearly a growl, and Tony crawled closer to him, nearly falling when Loki grabbed him by the collar and pulled him up until they were face to face. A sly smile crossed Loki’s face, and he ran his tongue over Tony’s wet lower lip. “Well. Aren’t you a good boy?” 

* * *

A thudding noise woke Tony before he had the chance to reply. His eyes flew open and he realized he was panting, his cock hard, his heart racing. Thankfully, he was under the covers, because as he turned towards the source of the noise he realized Loki had rapped his knuckles against the doorframe. 

“Nightmare?” Loki asked curiously as Tony sat up, taking a deep, shuddering breath. 

“Maybe, I don’t know. I never remember my dreams,” he lied, not getting out of bed even though it appeared that Loki was waiting for him to do so. 

“Well, that’s fortunate if you do have nightmares.” Loki pushed off from the doorframe and took a few steps into the room. “I have something for you.” 

For a moment, Tony wondered if he was still dreaming, and part of him leapt in excitement. But as Loki moved further into the room it was to grab the Iron Man gauntlet and toss it onto the bed with Tony. 

“Quickly, if you please,” he said and began to leave the room. 

“Wait, where am I supposed to go?” 

“The balcony,” Loki said, not facing him as he walked through the door and disappeared. 

Tony fell back onto the pillows, loosely holding the gauntlet in one hand. “This can’t keep happening,” he whispered. Untouched, his cock was beginning to soften, though it still ached and it was maddening to know there was nothing he could do about it. Not when Loki was expecting him immediately. So trying and failing to ignore his cock, he slid out of bed to change out of the clothes he had slept in. 

He was on the balcony within five minutes, the door being kind enough to drop him into the right room on the first try. He wore the Iron Man glove, figuring whatever Loki was doing required him to have it on immediately, but when he arrived on the balcony he saw what Loki was talking about. 

Just outside of the balcony was one of the Asgardian sky ships he had seen when he first arrived, a vessel the size of a modest fishing boat, shaped like a Viking ship with wings raised up in the back. Or rather, he thought, these were what Viking ships were based on, and he marveled at how it hovered in the air. There was no visible source of propulsion, no rocket thrusters, no motor, and though Loki stood right next to it his hair wasn’t even disturbed by any kind of air movement around the ship. It was just there, silent and floating, and yet again Asgardian technology left Tony baffled. 

“You’ve spent nearly two weeks cooped up in the palace,” said Loki as Tony approached. “You need to do some sightseeing before we return to Midgard.” A gangplank was set on the edge of the balcony and Loki stepped onto it, beckoning Tony to follow. He did, without hesitation, eager to see what Asgard had to offer as well as to ride in one of the inscrutable ships. The gangplank was thin though and he looked over the side a little nervous about the prospect of hitting the ground without his rocket thruster boots to save him. But he boarded the ship just the same, realizing Loki had moved one of the little table and chair sets from the balcony on it, and that it was laden down with breakfast food. Pastries filled with fruit and cream, a bowl of fruit containing blackberries, strawberries, and perfect spheres of melon scooped out by a melon-baller, and a large carafe of coffee all sat on the table along with two mugs.

Tony sat down at the table, not hearing what Loki was saying. Instead, he was looking at the food and the view at the gardens below and realizing that this was quite possibly the most romantic thing anyone had ever done for him. He blinked at the fruit as Loki passed him to walk to a bar with a handle at the back of the ship, sliding his hand in as the ship rose slightly away from the balcony. Barely registering what he was doing, Tony flipped out a holographic screen to start J.A.R.V.I.S.’ mapping program. 

“These things barely need any input to run,” Loki said as he came to sit across from Tony. “It’s going to take us in a big circle around the palace. You’ll get to see the markets, housing, forests, everything Asgard has to offer.” 

Tony nodded. He was thinking of dancing with Loki in the bedroom, of his firm hand on the small of his back, of Loki smiling a wolf’s smile as he dipped him. After having woken up from one of the dreams, he had rationalized the events of the past few weeks as being the result of stress and an overactive imagination. Of course, given the circumstances, he was going to feel as though he was growing closer to Loki, or maybe Loki was just playing his part so well that he was getting confused. But this, this was something else. 

“Are you well?” Loki asked, and Tony jerked his head up from where he’d still be looking at the holo-screen. “I said your name three times.”

Tony closed the screen sheepishly. “Sorry. Just didn’t get a lot of sleep last night.” 

“Oh?” Loki had poured himself a cup of coffee and was sitting with his legs crossed, bright morning sunlight glinting off the horns of his face-framing circlet. 

Looking out at the palace as it grew smaller, he nodded. “Yeah, I couldn’t really sleep. I went walking around the palace for a while instead.” He remembered speaking to Frigga in the art gallery, remembered the fierce anger in her voice when she had spoken about what Odin had done to Loki. He wanted to ask why he had killed the guards, but couldn’t bring himself to do so. Instead, he pulled the golden snake toy out of his pocket and placed it on the table in front of Loki. “I owe you an apology,” he said. 

Loki eyed the toy and took a sip from his cup, looking as though he was trying to look nonchalant despite his gaze being fixed on the toy. “I’m sure I can think of a multitude of things that are owed to me but we can start with whatever it is you have to say,” Loki sounded flippant but amused. 

“When I was walking through the palace I found the art gallery--” 

“Which one?” Loki interrupted, and Tony explained where he’d gone and what he had found within. 

“While I was there, your mother showed up.” 

Loki raised a brow, gazing at Tony from over the mug. “Did she, now? And what does that have to do with you apologizing to me?” 

Tony looked at him, really looked at him, and wondered how he could be gazing into the face of a murderer. The question about the guards was sitting on the tip of his tongue and he had to swallow it down before continuing. “She told me what happened. Why this is so important to you.” 

Loki’s face looked stricken for a split second before he tilted his chin upwards and gave Tony a placid, unbothered glance. “And what did she tell you?” 

“That Odin burned everything you owned and this was the only thing that survived. I want you to have it back.” Tony smiled a little as Loki placed his cup back onto the small table and picked up the toy. “How old were you?” 

“Are we really talking about this?” Loki’s brow furrowed and he reached for a pastry, looking as though he was trying to find somewhere to flee to. The wind ruffled his hair a little and despite the sour look on his face Tony couldn’t help but think he was beautiful like this, in the sun, dressed nicely in Asgardian clothing, horns and all, and despite wanting to know every detail, what he wanted to know the most was that Loki was alright. 

When Tony nodded slightly, Loki heaved a great sigh and said, “Three hundred and fifty-seven.”

“How...how old is that in human years?” 

“Oh, I don’t know. I’m two thousand-ish right now, so you can extrapolate from there.” 

Tony did a little math in his head, and looked at Loki in shock. “You were a teenager. Jesus...” he trailed off and looked over the side of the ship, taking in the densely packed, beautifully constructed houses they were now flying over. “How did you...why did you...?”  _ murder the guards _ , he thought, and said nothing. 

“What?” 

“Nothing, nothing.” He swallowed hard, having no appetite for breakfast but pouring himself a cup of coffee anyway. “How long?” 

“A year. Can we please talk about something else,” Loki asked, his jaw was set and his eyes were dark. “I brought you out here to see the realm, not to pry into my history.” 

“Sorry,” Tony gave him a sad, apologetic smile. “Tell me about what we’re flying over.” 

“Mm.” Loki finished a bite of pastry, and pointed over the side. “This is a residential district. Since it’s close to the palace it mostly houses people with a fair amount of money and power.” He gestured to one of the large houses that was built in a manner similar to the palace. “It has always been very popular to use motifs that mimic the palace. You’ll see them everywhere.” 

They sailed in relative quiet for a while, Loki occasionally chiming in to point out marketplaces or parks or the housing districts for those with less means, and despite feeling as though he couldn’t, Tony actually ate a healthy amount of the breakfast Loki had brought for them. He was content, though his mind drifted back to the idea that this had been a romantic gesture on Loki’s part. There was a burning question that he had to answer for himself if it was. 

Was this actually something he wanted?

“There’s a way out of Asgard here,” Loki said, pointing to a large mountain range. “It’s just very dangerous and difficult, and very few people even know about it. I’ve taken it once or twice--Heimdall is never happy to bring me back once he knows I’ve managed to bypass the bifrost.” He smiled a little smugly. “There are old ruins here as well, though I have no idea where they came from.” 

“Do you know how these ships work?” he asked curiously, leaning forward a little to rest his arms on the table. 

“I just know how to fly them. If I was a betting person, I would suspect magic is involved. But I’m a sorcerer, not a vehicle designer.” He gazed out at the scenery in silence for a moment, sipping the last of the coffee. “Are you enjoying yourself at all?” he asked finally, startling Tony. 

“Well, yeah. This is the most roma--” he stifled himself, a slightly panicked look on his face as he realized what he was saying. 

“I meant in general,” Loki said. If he noticed what Tony had been about to say he made no indication of it. 

“I’m not going to lie and say I’d rather be here than the Academy, but I’ve had a lot of fun,” he admitted. “I can see why you thought it might be interesting for me.” 

“What have you liked the most?” 

For a second, Tony was on the dance floor again, his head on Loki’s feathered shoulder, Loki’s fingertips on the back of his neck, Loki’s hand on the small of his back. He blinked, shaking it off.

Tony tilted his head thoughtfully. “Watching Sif and the warriors spar was really cool--I’ve never seen a good sword fight before.” 

“Oh!” Loki placed the cup on the table and picked up a strawberry, toying with it a little. “You’re going to get to see some more closely tomorrow.” 

“What?” He narrowed his eyes slightly, ready to get annoyed about Loki keeping something else from him. 

“You and I are supposed to spar in front of the court tomorrow. I meant to tell you sooner but you seemed busy.” 

“I...don’t know how to swordfight,” he said slowly. “I didn’t know you did either.” 

Loki scoffed. “I happen to be very good with a variety of martial weapons.” He stretched out his arm and a glittering gold-green light flickered as a sword appeared in his hand. He swished it around in the air, posturing a little. “Honestly I’m better with daggers, but this will be better for trying to crack into that crab carapace you wear.” 

It clicked and Tony blinked at Loki in surprise. “You’re supposed to fight me when I’m in the suit? That’s...going to be a really unbalanced fight.” 

Looking mildly offended, Loki unsummoned the sword. “You greatly underestimate me, Tony. I would be more careful about that, were I you. Just because I prefer to use other methods doesn’t mean I can’t beat you in a hand-to-hand fight.” 

“But the suit--” 

“Does not have an unlimited power source, if I understand correctly.” Loki glanced out over the side of the ship again. “All I have to do is wear you down. It  _ is _ going to be very unbalanced, but not for the reason you think.” A confident smirk crossed Loki’s face. “Look,” he said, pointing down over the side of the ship again. They were over a great ocean dotted with islands. Every island overflowed with buildings and other structures, most with sky ships or traditional ones docked on the edges. “We’re nearing the edge.” 

“The edge?” 

“Of Asgard.” he pointed to the horizon, where the realm just seemed to stop. 

“Asgard is flat?” he asked incredulously as they approached and he watched as water simply poured over the side. Above him, the sunny blue sky had disappeared, and they were instead under an black sky, stars spread in unfamiliar constellations and planets visible to the naked eye. In the distance he could see the mountain ranges, and even the palace, but looking ahead showed only empty space. If he fell...

“You sound nervous,” Loki said curiously, searching Tony’s face. “You don’t think you’re going to fall out of the realm, do you?” 

“It’s a possibility I’m not used to, having been born on a  _ globe _ .” 

“As you wish,” Loki said and passed him on his way to the back of the boat again. “I wouldn’t let you fall,” he added, and a furious flutter rose in Tony’s stomach as he watched Loki expertly change their course. Wind blew his hair back as they began to speed up and Tony swallowed at the vision of Loki illuminated by starlight. 

When it came to falling, Tony was starting to think it might be too late. 


	16. Chapter 16

Tony was starting to believe that Loki’s doors were fucking with him. Half the time, no matter where he was trying to go, he ended up in Loki’s bedroom to find Brunhilde sleeping on his pillows or tearing around the room with a sock in her mouth. At least a quarter of the time, they were placing him in the bathroom, and that’s where he was now, after having tried to get back to his rooms to pick up the Iron Man suit. 

This time though, the bathroom, with the waterfall spilling into the tub and the wall of mirrors, wasn’t empty. With a black towel wrapped low around his waist, Loki stood in front of the mirrors, finger-combing his wet hair. Unable to stop himself, Tony stared at his reflection, taking in the slim lines of Loki’s body, the slight curve of his hip, small pink nipples and, most surprisingly, a large diamond stud in his navel. 

Instantly, Tony was struck with a memory of doing body shots off of a woman at the beach who had the same kind of navel ring. It had been rough on his tongue when he licked salt off of her belly before moving up her body to get to the shot glass of tequila she had resting between her breasts. Though it had been a while ago, the memory felt fresh, he could taste the her skin, salty from the ocean as well as the salt shaker and once he came back down to Asgard it was to realize his jaw had slightly dropped and a tingly ache had started to grow in his belly.  

With a flicker of gold-green light, Loki’s clothes appeared on him, taking the view from Tony, much to his dismay and relief. With his wet hair brushing the fur ruff of his coat, he curiously eyed Tony, dropping the towel now that he was covered up. Despite the clothing, Tony swallowed hard at the knowledge that it was only an illusion, and that Loki was actually naked as he stood in front of him. 

“Can I help you?” Loki asked with a raised brow. 

“The door put me here,” Tony said immediately, guilt rumbling in his stomach at having stumbled in on him during a private moment, as well as the fact that he was, once again, trying to will his cock into not getting hard as it responded to his best friend. “Sorry about that.” 

Loki eyed Tony suspiciously as he headed towards the door. “You were staring.” 

Tony’s stomach jumped and he tried not to let it show. “I was surprised that you had a belly button ring, that’s all. You didn’t have one when we went to the beach last time.” 

“I like it,” Loki said defensively, tilting to one side as he wrung out his hair. 

“I didn’t say there was anything wrong with it.” Tony stumbled over his apology, inching towards the door. “Can you help me get to my room? We’re supposed to spar in about a half an hour and I need to get the suit ready.” 

Striding across the room, Loki grabbed Tony by the upper arm, but he was paralyzed by the knowledge that, underneath the illusion, Loki was still completely naked. Noticing his stillness, though hopefully not the cause of it, Loki yanked him through the door and into Tony's bedroom where Brunhilde had now settled herself in his open suitcase. “You just have to think about where you’re trying to go, or what you’re looking for,” Loki said as he deposited Tony in the room. “I’ll be in my own room if you need me,” he said, and disappeared in a flash of green-gold light as he stepped through the door. 

Oh. Oh, he needed him. 

* * *

Tony gazed around the arena at the enormous mass of Asgardians that had gathered to watch the fights. Odin, Frigga, Thor and Janet sat in a hovering balcony box, and Janet waved wildly when his eyes lit on her. Tony was glad he was wearing the armor. While he had addressed huge crowds at press conferences, wearing Armani and other designer suits, the suit he always felt most comfortable in was shiny red and gold. All but the glove, that is. The matte silver uru glove clashed with the rest of the suit, but Tony had plans to plate it with the same amalgam metal as the rest of the armor as soon as they got home. The crowd cheered wildly when he rose off of the ground using the rocket thruster boots and the arc reactor in one gauntlet to steady himself. He waved, and hoots of excitement played through the crowd. 

He was still filled with something like nervous dismay in knowing he would be fighting against Loki. Despite his boasting, Tony was certain he wasn’t going to be able to hold his own against a suit that enhanced Tony’s strength to the point where he could lift one hundred tons. Even without the repulsor blasts, a few punches should be enough to knock him onto his ass. 

A few moments passed without Loki showing up, and Tony, to keep the crowd happy, did a couple of speedy maneuvers to show off what the suit was capable of, drawing oohs and ahhs from the intrigued onlookers. 

“Always the show-off!” 

Tony turned to see Loki walking into the arena, wearing a green breastplate made of overlapping scales and the regular boots he always wore on campus. He had elbow pads and knee pads made from the same green scales, and was wearing a full helm with long curving horns rather than the face-framing circlet he usually wore. In his hand he held a sword that shimmered gold when he raised it up, but that was all. Tony had anticipated that he’d have a shield of some kind, as some of the Asgardian warriors had when they had sparred, but no. It was just Loki in some light, useless-looking armor and a sword that exuded some kind of unidentifiable energy on his heads-up display. 

Tony dropped to the ground and walked up to Loki as he approached. He offered a hand for him to shake, but Loki simply held his head high and readied his sword. 

“Are we to exchange pleasantries, or are we to fight?” he asked as Tony drew near. 

“I feel like it’s possible to do both,” Tony said, his voice slightly distorted from the speaker in the suit. Loki took the hand with the uru gauntlet, and instead of shaking it, brought it to his lips, his eyes sparkling with mischief as Tony’s heart began to race. 

“Pleasantries exchanged,” Loki said with a sly smile. “Now hit me.” 

Tony hesitated for the briefest second, and as he did, Loki rolled his eyes, put himself into a more stable stance, and swung the sword hard. It struck Tony in the chest and he was stunned by the way his armor reverberated around him. That usually happened when he was fighting someone like Thor, or the Hulk, not someone as lithe as Loki. Loki reared back for another swing and Tony put the arm with the uru glove up, catching the blow before it could hit him in the chest again, and trying to grab the blade. Loki was too fast though, as soon as he made a move to reach for it, he had jumped backwards and now stood a few feet in front of Tony, stretching his arm out and crooking one finger, beckoning him. 

Charging the new glove to about forty percent power, Tony raised his hand and fired a repulsor blast at Loki’s chest, expecting him to dodge. He didn’t. He stood stock still as it came for him and when it struck him in the chest he took the blast with only a slight flinch. Tony blinked, he had been sure that that would be more than enough to knock someone Loki’s size off of his feet without really hurting them, but apparently Asgardians were made of stronger stuff than that. 

Loki began to approach, loosely holding his sword, making no attempt to try to block whatever was coming next from Tony’s suit. This time he fired up the repulsor to sixty percent power, but when the blast hit Loki he only jerked backwards for a half-second before continuing his path towards him. 

Tony was beginning to see why Loki had been so confident that he would win this fight, and this time, convinced that it would knock him down, Tony charged both of the repulsors in his gauntlets to one hundred percent and shot both beams at Loki’s chest. 

They went through him, the illusion sparkling into green-gold light as Tony felt something slam into his back. He had no idea how Loki had gotten back there so quickly, while he was staring him down the whole time. He twisted and began to lift himself off the ground with his boots, but he felt Loki grab his wrist and yank him out of the air before he could steady himself. He slammed onto the ground with a grunt, recovering quickly and managing to dart away from Loki in the air before he could do anything else. 

The crowd cheered with every blow. When Tony got close enough to try to strike Loki, Loki always had his sword at the ready. When he fired his repulsors, they soared through illusions or hit the ground as Loki darted away, fast as a startled deer. The energy readouts in the suit’s central arc reactor still looked good, but his left hand, the one without the uru glove, was getting depleted fast, faster than it should have been. 

In an attempt to see through Loki’s illusions, Tony took a feint to the left in the air as Loki, having pulled a dagger from somewhere, threw it at him and punctured a chest plate. Three Lokis stood there, all with swords, and thinking fast, Tony used a repulsor blast to hit the ground in front of him, kicking up enough dirt that he saw the real Loki put his arm over his eyes to cover them. He flew at him then, grabbed his horns, and tried to get him off balance. 

“Let go!” Loki shouted, sounding annoyed but not distressed, and he swung the sword so hard at Tony’s foot that he was surprised the boot didn’t separate from the rest of the suit. 

Once, he managed to strike Loki in the chest with a fully charged beam from the central reactor, and he went tumbling backwards, leaving a trail of dust behind him as he skidded across the dirt floor. For the briefest moment he was on his knees, but Tony barely had enough time to try and react to how much he liked that view as he realized in dismay that that shot had depleted his suit to almost half-power. It must have been Asgard. Something about the realm was making his arc reactors fail, and he had the sudden terrified thought of what would happen if the one in his chest did too. 

He then felt something slam into him from the side, and there was a cracking noise as Loki’s sword busted one of the plates holding the suit around his stomach. The crowd went wild, some people standing and clapping over their heads at the spectacle. The metal plate fell to the floor and Tony stared at Loki in disbelief. Loki only smiled a wolf’s smile, not a single hair out of place despite having taken at least a dozen hits. 

That grin hit Tony in the chest just as hard as the sword had. Thoughts of his arc reactor were gone now, and all he could think of was just how strong Loki must actually be. 

Then Loki had him around the waist, a hand on the small of his back, the other holding the uru glove. “Let’s dance,” he whispered, and a shiver ran down Tony’s spine. He barely had the chance to register what was happening before Loki took advantage of Tony’s surprise and slammed him into the ground, putting a foot on his chest. When he looked up at him, something in Tony bubbled with excitement at the view of Loki looming over him. He took a deep, shuddering breath as he watched Loki smile, light from above the arena glinting off of his helm, and a small part of him wanted to just stay there until Loki decided that it was time for him to get up. Shaking himself back to his senses, Tony rolled out from under him, but before he could get to his feet he felt Loki’s sword slice the back of the armor, whiplike, hearing a small piece of it fall to the ground. The crowd was losing it. 

Staying in the air and being careful not to let Loki get too close to him, Tony tried to use his repulsors to take him down, despite having no luck before. It seemed impossible. Loki was always a step ahead with an illusion or an easy dodge. One time he even deflected a blast with his sword, and Tony realized that the more Loki bested him, the more his body responded. The heart-rate meter in his suit was going wild along with the power readouts that were displaying quickly falling figures in hologram before his eyes. 

He had about enough power for one last big omni blast, so, as Loki vamped for the crowd, slicing through the air with the practiced stance of a fencer, he charged it up and shot it directly at Loki’s chest. It hit him this time, and Tony felt a surge of satisfaction burst in his chest as Loki went flying again, dragging his sword in the dirt to stop himself before he could hit the wall of the arena. 

Tony tried to take off in the suit to get into the air before Loki had time to come back with his sword, but realized there wasn’t enough power to do so. Right now it was about as useful as a suit of battered old knight’s armor, but he approached Loki just the same, pulling back his fist to try to hit him in the jaw. Loki grabbed his hand before he had the chance, twisted it over his head, and with a foot to the chest knocked Tony back onto his heels. Loki looked a lot more disheveled now, sweat on his brow, his chest heaving with deep breaths, his gaze intense. He took a deep breath and smiled smugly, lifting his sword under Tony’s chin and tilting the helm upwards. A thrill ran through Tony’s body at this, and, in more than one way, he knew he was beat. He gazed at Loki, his hair was out of place, cheeks flushed with exertion, and there was something about being at his mercy that left Tony tingling with excitement so hard that the suit’s heart-rate meter was flashing at a panicked pace.  

“Yield,” Loki said, loud enough for the crowd to hear him, and inside the suit Tony shivered. The thought,  _ yes sir _ , crossed his mind and he mentally shook it off, feeling a flush rising to his ears. 

For a moment, he considered raising his hands, gesturing that he was going to submit, but instead, he lifted his hands, grasped the sword, and pulled it down to point at the central arc reactor. It was a good move to entertain the crowd, he thought, but, what he was really hoping was the Loki understood the significance of it. Hoping that he could see that Tony’s heart (along with other parts of his body) was there for the taking. 

For the briefest moment, Loki’s eyes widened, jaw dropping almost imperceptibly. But it was gone almost instantly, and Loki threw his head back with a laugh and gave the armor a little tap with the point of his sword. 

The crowd went mad. In their box, Frigga, Janet, and Thor all stood up, clapping wildly at Loki’s victory. With a balanced swing, Loki took back his sword and placed the blade on his shoulder where it transformed into the staff he usually carried. His face was ecstatic as he looked around at the cheering crowd, soaking in every clap, every shout, every Asgardian who got to their feet to cheer for him. 

It was as Tony was getting to his feet that he realized the readouts in his suit were showing almost full power. He blinked in surprise. Seconds ago the suit had been entirely depleted; there was no way it had as much power as it was saying it did. Then he looked at Loki’s grinning face and his jaw dropped. 

Loki must have manipulated the holographic readouts with his illusions. That was the only explanation for how the suit had drained as quickly as it had with so little exertion. Flipping up the faceplate he jogged over to Loki, who was leaving the arena. 

“How the fuck did you do that?” He asked, belatedly realizing he hadn’t heard J.A.R.V.I.S. for the second half of the fight. 

“Machines are easier to trick than people, sometimes,” Loki said simply, brushing dirt off of his breastplate. “But I think I let you have enough fun before I shut J.A.R.V.I.S. down, don’t you?”

“That’s not fair,” Tony said, feeling a little petulant but not caring. They weren’t on an equal playing field and his loss felt kind of embarrassing. 

“I used my skills, you used yours.” Loki turned to face Tony, nearing him close enough that Loki only had to whisper to be heard. “Take off the suit and we can go another round.” 

Tony swallowed, feeling a deeper flush cross over his face. “You take off your armor too and I’ll think about it,” he said, trying to sound bold. Loki tilted his head back and laughed, grabbing Tony’s chin and lifting his head upward to meet his eyes. There was something dangerous in them, and Tony flicked his gaze away, heart pounding wildly, the burning excitement in his belly almost too much to handle. 

“I’m a god, and you’re a man in a fancy suit; I was always going to come out on top.” Loki said with a smug grin, and Tony pulled backwards out of his grasp. Loki’s gloating was grating, but there was something in his eyes that kept Tony from being able to meet them. Raising his voice to be heard by the crowd again, Loki asked, “Are you spent, darling? Did I wear you out?” Loki threw an arm over his shoulder, still grinning, looking happier than Tony had seen him the entire time they had been in Asgard. His words struck Tony in the gut and he knew his ears were bright red. 

“I don’t know, are you satisfied yet?” he managed to ask, trying to tease as well as Loki did, and pulling another grin from Loki when he did. Thankful that the suit hid his the fact that the excitement that had been building through the fight was coming to a head, he let Loki lead him out of the arena. “You put up a good fight, though. What impressive stamina you have,” Loki continued as they walked, and Tony thought that he was more than ready to show Loki just how much he could take. 

* * *

On the last day that Tony and the rest were to be in Asgard, Loki went missing. He didn’t show up for breakfast or lunch, and when Tony explored his rooms to see if he was there, even checking the bathroom despite what had happened last time, he couldn’t find him. Brunhilde was gone too, and Tony wondered if Loki had come up with some way to stay in Asgard indefinitely. The thought made his stomach sink more than just a little, and he considered asking Heimdall if he could see where he had gone. But, if Loki had found a way to stay in Asgard, Tony wasn’t sure he wanted to stop him from being happy no matter how much the prospect of returning to the Academy without him hurt. 

Just the same, when Loki didn’t show up for dinner, Tony flicked open his holographic map of the palace and studied it for a while, trying to discern what rooms were so infrequently used that Loki might have managed to hide in them. There was too much, though, for one man to search through in one night, and he sighed in dismay at the thought of never seeing Loki again. It twisted up his heart and left a cold feeling in his stomach. 

He had a thought then, almost out of nowhere, as he watched Odin pass him by in the hallway. With deliberate speed he began walking towards the throne room. If Loki was actually planning on leaving Asgard as he was supposed to, Tony had a hunch that he was going to take the chance to sit on the throne at least once before he did. 

As he neared the throne room he began to hear the muffled sound of dozens upon dozens of people murmuring. Occasionally there was a pause and light, but enthusiastic applause, but then room fell back into a din of whispers and low voices. Though Tony listened, he couldn’t pick out what they were talking about. 

As Tony took the first step into the throne room he nearly gasped. It was packed with Asgardians, all excitedly talking amongst themselves as they glanced up to the throne now and then. He couldn’t see what they were looking at, and couldn’t fathom why so many had gathered when Odin wasn’t in the room. He began to wind his way through the crowd to see what they were all looking at, and as he did he accidentally bumped into a small cluster of people. 

Or rather, he would have bumped into them if they had actually been there. Instead of colliding with solid bodies, Tony walked right through an illusion, a green-gold sparkle of light appearing in the air as it disappeared. Curiously, he strode through the illusory crowd to come to stand before the throne. 

Like all things in the Asgardian palace, the throne was enormous and golden. Each arm was a replica prow from one of the sky ships, while great, swooping wings framed either side of the seat. The throne was on a tall dais that required stairs to reach the seat, and the room around it made the rest of the palace pale in its opulence. 

On the throne sat Loki, dressed in Asgardian leather, wearing the horned crown with the black opals, his hair loose around his face and a long fur cloak sitting over his shoulders. He sat slightly to one side, elbow propped on the arm of the throne, his staff held loosely in his other hand. Brunhilde sat with him, on his shoulder, kneading the cloak with her little naked paws. He watched impassively as Tony approached. 

As soon as Loki saw Tony, the illusions disappeared and the enormous hall emptied in a flash. Tony half expected Loki to be angry at him as he addressed his illusory court, but his face was only weary and sad, and it struck Tony hard in the chest how much he wanted to do whatever it took to fix the expression on Loki’s face. 

“I didn’t mean to interrupt,” Tony said, but Loki simply shrugged as he approached. Tony took the stars up the dais and stood before Loki, concern crossing his features. “But we haven’t been able to find you all day. You skipped three meals.” 

“Just had to feel what it was like to be king at least once before my exile recommences,” Loki said flatly. 

“Have you been here the whole time?” Tony’s brows furrowed at the thought. 

Loki shrugged again, reaching up to pet Brunhilde, who was now licking his cheek gently. Tony wanted to tell him that this wouldn’t be it, that he’d get the chance to be king someday, but he knew it wasn’t possible outside of truly extraordinary circumstances, and he didn’t want to patronize Loki with false hope. 

“I’m sorry you have to come back to the Academy,” Tony said, his chest tight. While the idea of leaving Loki in Asgard hurt deeply, the thought of how unhappy he had been on Earth was also unsettling. 

“Are you, then?” Loki sighed and let go of his staff, which simply hovered in the air where he left it. He rested back with both arms on the throne. “If I stayed, Odin would find a reason to punish me. There’s always a reason to punish Loki.” His jaw was set and despite how sad he had looked just moments ago, anger flashed in his eyes. “So, what would be the point?” He tilted his head back to stare at the fresco on the ceiling, the one depicting a benevolent Odin addressing his subjects, Loki and Thor at his side. 

Carefully, avoiding Loki’s arm, Tony perched on the very edge of one of the arms of the throne. Loki gave him an odd look, holding his gaze with a somewhat confused expression. 

“I can’t pretend to understand what it’s like to live under the constant threat of being locked up for who knows how long,” Tony began carefully. “But I know what it’s like to hate your father.” 

“Do you, now?” 

“I don’t tell people what Howard was like because I don’t like dredging up memories of being beaten with a belt when I was nine for leaving legos on the kitchen table,” Tony said, his face humorless as he watched Loki’s brow raise almost imperceptibly. “But he was a real winner.” Tony laced his fingers together and rested his hands on his lap as he looked up at the fresco Loki had been staring at. “Always wanted to make him proud, though. I always felt like if I just tried hard enough, if I got better at whatever it was he was harassing me about at the time: grades, machines, women, whatever--” 

“Women?” 

“Ah, yeah. I was a soft kid. Howard was convinced I was going to grow up to be queer. Turns out you can’t berate that out of someone no matter how hard you try, though,” Tony said with a sardonic smile. “Odin’s a terrible person and, when terrible people raise kids, they raise kids who think it’s their fault for not being good enough.” 

Loki furrowed his brow in what looked like weary anger. “I do not have an inferiority complex,” Loki began, and Tony held his tongue. “It’s not about me wanting to impress the All-father, it’s about me being in my rightful place. I would be a better ruler either Odin or Thor.” 

Tony nodded a little. “And I’m better person than Howard, at least I try to be, and you’re a better person than Odin, no matter what you’ve done.” 

“What do you know of what I’ve done, Anthony?” Loki asked tiredly, and while the anger had left his eyes, the sadness hadn’t. 

“Your mother told me about the guards.” 

“I had expected as much.” He paused. “The story behind that is actually more complicated than some of the things I’ve done.” 

“I’d like to know what happened, if you wouldn’t mind telling me,”  Tony asked gently, not wanting to pry, but eager to hear the story just the same. 

Loki rolled his eyes and crossed his arms over his chest. “I played a prank on Odin and Thor. I wish I could remember what it was, because it was  _ hilarious _ . But it was clearly not appreciated because Odin ordered three guards to follow me at all times unless I was in my own rooms. They followed me out of the palace, in my gardens, they were on my heel every step I took.” Loki set his jaw at the memory. “Frost giants are able to freeze the air around them, did you know that?” Loki asked, turning to Tony now. 

“No.” 

“I didn’t either.” Loki shook his head. “I snapped, and they froze. One fell to the ground and shattered. I understand it was an instant death, at least.” A deep weariness was in Loki’s eyes as he sighed. “As soon as they found me I was confined to the dungeons. I understand Odin privately spoke of disowning me.” 

“But you didn’t do it on purpose,” Tony said with a furrowed brow, compelled to reach out and take Loki into his arms, but managing to hold back. 

“Does that matter?” After a long pause he continued. “Mother visited me every day. I would have gone mad if she hadn’t. She would sit with me for hours. Taught me how to knit and do needlepoint so I would have something to do with my hands. She is...” he trailed off, looking at his hands. “I cannot, for the life of me, understand why she stays with him.” 

“Maybe she’s afraid.” Tony filed away the information that Loki could  _ knit _ for a later date, despite his surprise. “My mother was always afraid of Howard, and for good reason. I don’t know what he would have done if she’d tried to leave...But, you know, she loved him too. I don’t understand it. From my point of view he didn’t do anything to deserve that, but that’s just how it was.” 

“I don’t wish to talk about this anymore,” Loki said, visibly uncomfortable, looking into the middle distance while Tony sat next to him. After a moment he tilted his face towards Tony, his eyes deeply weary and just a touch sad. 

Without thinking about what he was doing, Tony leaned forward, cupped Loki’s chin in his hand, and kissed him ever so lightly. His lips were soft, parted slightly, and the most gentle of gasps came from Loki before he flinched away from Tony as if he’d been burned, something like pained shock crossing over his face before he turned away quickly, looking away from Tony. 

“I’m sorry,” Tony said immediately, his stomach dropping at the look on Loki’s face. “I don’t know what I was thinking,” he slid off of the arm of the throne, thinking he knew exactly what had come over him, and the shock on Loki’s face had drained everything from him. “Just pretend that never happened.” 

He began to leave, wishing Loki would call for him, wondering how he had misread the signs so badly when it didn’t happen. He could have sworn that it wasn’t one-sided, not with the way Loki touched him, not with the way he looked at him, but he had apparently added things up incorrectly. Everything he had thought was building up was crashing to the ground, and he desperately needed to escape before Loki could admonish him. 

His heart sunk with every step and by the time he left the throne room he felt empty and cold and wishing he was already out of Asgard so he could go to his workshop, lock the doors, and work until he passed out. 


	17. Chapter 17

This time, when Loki packed, it took six boxes to gather everything up, not just the one. Part of it was his mother had sent him with a host of things from Asgard; books, clothing, even some of the decor from his bedroom so he could finally feel more at home on Midgard. The rest was that he had to gather up everything of Brunhilde’s, and he had spoiled her greatly since he had gotten her the month prior. 

“Do you need any help getting your stuff back to the dorm?” Tony asked from the doorway, and Loki shook his head. 

“I’ll just make a couple trips. Do you mind if I take the painting?” Loki asked. 

“Yeah, it’s yours,” Tony said, and Loki lifted it off the wall and placed it in the largest box. 

It was transactional. Loki had flatly thanked Tony for his help, telling him he appreciated how well he had played along, and without another word had gone to his room to pack. 

Part of him had wished that Tony hadn’t taken his surprise as rejection, but it was too late now. He had told him to forget it ever happened, so Loki swallowed it down and put on the mask, glamour covering his weary face, the rest taken care of by centuries of lying. 

He was going to miss living in Stark Tower, and he told himself it was because of the amenities. Because of the enormous bed and the kitchen, and  _ not  _ because Tony stumbled into it every morning, with bleary eyes and messy hair, thankful for the breakfast Loki had made. Not because of the late night coffee when neither of them could sleep, and definitely not because they would sit in the living room together in companionable silence, Tony studying, Loki browsing the internet on a tablet that loaded instantaneously due to the superior wifi. 

While it occurred to him that he could always come back, he shot down the thought as soon as he had it. Despite the fact that he had spent nearly full days at Stark Tower before moving in, what had passed between them was too much to surmount. It was simply easier to carry his things out and consider their friendship too broken to mend. Loki strapped Brunhilde into a tiny harness, put a leash on her, and walked her out of the tower as he left. She dug her feet into the ground, refusing to move, and he had to scoop her up and put her on his shoulder to leave. 

* * *

Natasha was sitting at her desk when he returned to the high-security dorm, and she raised a curious brow at him as he entered. 

“Trouble in paradise?” she asked as he placed a couple of boxes and his foot locker, the golden toy neatly hidden in the secret compartment, onto the bed. “I thought you were living with Tony.” 

“It was an arrangement that has come to an end,” he said flatly, looking around in dismay at the small room. 

“You’re not going to be able to fit all of this stuff in here.” 

“I know. I intend to rent a storage unit,” he said without looking at her, pulling a nail and a hammer out of the box and hammering it into the wall next to his bed. 

“Hey, we’re not allowed to do that,” Natasha said, though her voice had no teeth in it. If anything, the overwhelming emotion she was displaying was suspicion. 

“As if you, of all people, care about the rules,” he said as he hung the painting, shifting it from one side to the other. He then pulled the scratching post out of the box. “Do you mind if I put this between our desks?” She simply shrugged and he did so, letting Brunhilde out of her harness and placing her by it to encourage her to scratch. 

“We’re not supposed to have pets either,” she said, though she leaned down to scritch Brunhilde’s back. “But I won’t say anything about it. She’s way too cute to get you into trouble over.” She glanced up. “So what happened? Did Tony kick you out or something?” 

“You could say that, and you could also stop prying into my personal business,” he said as he placed Brunhilde’s beds at the end of his, belatedly realizing that the sphere-shaped bed with the cat sized hole in it was full of Tony’s socks. He sighed deeply and left the bed where it sat. 

There was a knock from the open door, and Loki turned to see Janet rapping her knuckles against the doorframe. Natasha and Janet waved at one another, but Janet's attention was on Loki. “Hey Loki,” Janet said, and jerked her head towards the hallway. “I want to talk to you for a minute.” 

“Are you intending to pry as well?” he asked, placing a few books on the built-in bookshelf next to his bed. “If so, I must regretfully pass. As you can see I’m quite busy.” 

“Oh, come on, Loki,” she said and strode into the room, grabbing him by the arm and giving him a surprisingly strong tug. Though there was nobody in the campus who could have forced him to move outside of Thor and Hulk, he sighed and followed her out. 

In the hallway she looked at him oddly. “What’s going on? Tony told me you took your stuff and left.” 

“Can we talk somewhere other than in front of the nosiest roommate on Midgard?” he asked, and he and Janet began walking out of the door towards a coffee cart in the middle of campus. 

It was dreary outside, the sky threatening rain, and there were few people in the quad, most studying for finals in their dorms or the libraries. The coffee cart, usually a hot spot, had no line and Jan bought them both a cup of coffee and sat down with him at a nearby bench.

“You’ve been acting really weird since yesterday and I want to know what’s going on.” 

“I don’t see how it’s your business.” 

“Of course it’s my business!” Janet raised her voice and nearby, Doreen Green glanced over curiously. Loki and Janet waved, then turned their attention back to one another. “You and Tony are my best friends and you’re both being really strange and I want to know why.” 

“There’s nothing strange about me moving out,” Loki said after a sip of his coffee. “This was always transactional. He helped, I gave him the opportunity to study Asgardian technology, and it’s over now. What is it to you, anyway?” 

“Loki!” Janet’s jaw dropped. “What is going on?” 

Loki closed his eyes and counted to ten before standing. “Thanks for the coffee.” 

As he walked away Janet zipped down into her flying size and followed him, perching on his shoulder while he headed towards the library. “I don’t like this, Loki.” 

“And I don’t like being interrogated. I’ve gotten enough of that in the past.” he tried to flick her away but she was too fast and moved to the other shoulder before he could. 

“I spoke to Tony briefly when we got back. You were so happy and excited when you two sparred and now you’re barely speaking to him, apparently. That was just two days ago, what happened?” 

“It’s not your business,” he repeated firmly, raising his voice. “If you want to hitch a ride on me you’ll do it silently or you won’t do it at all,” he said with his teeth clenched, ready to be anywhere but there, ready to find a hole and hide in it until he felt like himself again. 

Janet flew off of his shoulder, her tiny face appearing hurt. “Don’t talk to me like that, Loki. I haven’t done anything to deserve you treating me like crap.”

“Leave me alone and I won’t treat you like anything,” he said, leaving her hanging in the air, her jaw dropped in disbelief as he rapidly got away from her. 

* * *

Tony was in his workshop when Janet found him, wearing a jeweler's eye and working on the uru gauntlet with impossibly tiny tools. Classic rock was pounding from the speakers and he didn’t hear her when she said his name. 

“J.A.R.V.I.S., can you turn the music down a little?” she asked, and instead the music stopped, and Tony looked up in confusion, understanding coming over his face when he saw Janet walking towards him. 

“Hey Jan,” he looked back down, barely registering her presence until she had shrunk and was standing on top of the glove, her features distorted from her proximity to the magnifying glass. “Okay, then.” Tony sat back, rolling his shoulders. “What’s up?”

“I just spoke to Loki,” she said, hopping down off of the glove to walk to the other side of the table, fly off of it, and return to her normal size. She dragged a chair from a different table so she could sit across from him. “And he’s acting really, really weird. Do you know what’s going on?” 

Tony sighed and took off the jeweler’s eye, sitting it on the table next to the gauntlet. “Yeah, I think I do.” Tony pinched the bridge of his nose and rubbed a little. “The last day we were there, I kissed him.” 

Jan’s jaw dropped slightly and she leaned forward, eyes wide. “You kissed him?” 

“I thought something was going on.” In the next few minutes, Tony explained everything to Jan, from Loki pushing him against the counter in the kitchen, to dancing in his bedroom, to the sky ship ride, leaving out the dreams before describing the moment on the throne when Loki had turned his sad face up to as if he had needed some kind of comfort desperately. Then, how he’d flinched away and had barely spoken to Tony since. “I guess I was just confused. I have to admit that being in Asgard was pretty exciting, and Loki was just acting differently. I guess it was because he was home.” Weariness crossed over Tony’s face, along with something sort of like disappointment. 

“Oh, I don’t buy that,” Jan said, leaning forward with her elbows on the table, her chin cupped in her hands. “I know you’re not lying to me, and if everything really happened the way you said it did, I don’t think you were just imagining things. What happened immediately after you kissed him?” 

“He gave me this look, I don’t know how to describe it, but it wasn’t positive. So I apologized and left,” Tony said with a sigh. 

“Huh.” Jan furrowed her brows thoughtfully. “Maybe you startled him. You said you can’t really describe his face, maybe you misinterpreted it?” 

“Even if I did that doesn’t explain the cold shoulder.” Tony gave her a weak smile. “Can I get back to work?” 

“Not yet.” Janet drummed her fingers on the table. “What did you want to happen when you kissed him? Like, did you want it to be the start of something?” 

“I think so.” Tony absently stroked his goatee, which was grown out a little more than normal. “If you’re asking me if I want to date him, I think the answer is yes.” 

“Then you need to talk to him about it.” 

Though Tony flushed a little, he shook his head firmly. “I don’t think so. I think I just want to work on my suits and my classes and wait for this to all blow over so we can all go back to being friends. So, don’t tell him I said this, okay?” 

“I really think you need to talk to him,” she repeated firmly. “I think this might be a misunderstanding. I want you two to be happy, whether you get together or not, and avoiding one another isn’t going to help.” 

“I always appreciate your advice, but I can’t always take it,” Tony said, reaching across the table to grab her hand and give it a squeeze. “Thank you, but I’m not going to bring this up with him.” 

“I think you’re both being dumb.” Janet said, but when she got up it was to walk around the table and give Tony a hug from behind, resting her cheek against his shoulder. He reached around to pat her back before she shrunk and flew off, leaving him there alone. 

“J.A.R.V.I.S., put the music back on,” he said, and once again the speakers began to blast classic rock into the workshop. He put the jeweler’s eye back on and went back to work, trying not to think about what Janet had said, or how soft Loki’s lips had been. 

* * *

Finals came and went. Tony aced them easily, realizing that he probably hadn’t needed to study even half as hard as he had, while Loki sent an illusion in his stead, and didn’t fill out a single answer. That same illusion sat in detention for a week while Loki stayed holed up in his dorm room, only leaving to pick up take-out and take Brunhilde for walks. 

That was, until Hydra infiltrated the campus (again) and everyone banded together to root them out and send them packing. Tony found himself fighting in close proximity to Loki, who was throwing daggers with enough precision to knock the guns out of people’s hands, as well as using illusions to trick the enemy into attacking one another. Tony was impressed, and couldn’t help but think back to the time in the arena, and how fun that had been. His chest ached a little to see Loki standing with his arms crossed when it was all over, glancing over at Tony then looking away quickly as they escorted handcuffed Hydra operatives to the S.H.I.E.L.D. detention center together. He tried to talk to him, but his tongue dried up in his mouth, and Loki never said a word. 

After a few weeks, Tony realized that despite Loki no longer living with him, socks were still going missing. Reviewing security video showed that, somehow, Brunhilde was trotting into the tower, making her way up the elevator, and stealing one sock at a time from his dirty laundry bin. 

“J.A.R.V.I.S., why are you letting her in?” he asked once he watched the third video of Brunhilde standing calmly in the elevator, a sock in her mouth, before dragging it out of the tower. 

“I see no harm in her wanting to visit now and then,” he replied. 

Tony was going to ask if he let strays and raccoons into the tower as well, but realized that J.A.R.V.I.S. must have considered Brunhilde to be a sort of family member, given how comfortable she had made herself when living there. 

Grabbing a pair of socks out of the drawer, he stuffed them in his pocket and headed out towards the high-security dorm. His stomach was fluttery, but he didn’t want to have that rift between him and his best friend for the rest of his life, and he thought a peace offering might be the first step in getting things back to normal. 

Tony found Loki sitting on his bed, using chopsticks to eat Chinese food out of little paper cartons. Brunhilde was laying at his feet, wearing a bejeweled collar and a small, pink sweater. Loki’s gaze flicked up when he entered and he looked away just as quickly. Brunhilde, however, leapt to her feet and hopped off the bed, squeaking up to him. 

“Hey Loki.” Tony pretended not to have noticed his glance. “I brought something for Brunhilde.” 

Puzzled, Loki looked up at him, setting the carton on his bedside table next to a cup of bubble tea. “Did you, now?” 

He dug the socks out of his pocket and entered the room, offering them to Brunhilde, who immediately jumped on the pair of socks as he set them on the ground. She wrestled with them, biting down with her tiny needle teeth and tugging until the pair was separated and she triumphantly held one sock in her mouth. 

“That was very kind of you,” Loki said, somewhat stiffly. “I’m sure she appreciates it.” Brunhilde, for her part, rolled onto her back like an otter and kicked the sock with her back feet. 

“Well.” A dozen things swam through Tony’s head as he tried to keep his face neutral. “Hey, did you want to go see a movie this weekend?” he asked suddenly, nearly startling himself by how quickly the thought had come from his mind to his mouth. 

“Mm.” Loki cast his gaze towards Brunhilde. “I have other plans.” 

“Hey, that’s fine, just let me know when you’re free to hang out,” Tony said, and when Loki didn’t respond, he left, sighing deeply as he passed Natasha in the hallway on her way back to the double she shared with Loki. She gave him a curious look, but he only gave her a small nod of acknowledgement and left. 

* * *

“You cannot stay in this room forever,” Natasha said, for the fourth or fifth time that week as she sat on the edge of her bed, staring him down. “I haven’t had any privacy for  _ weeks _ and it’s starting to get really old.” 

“Then go stay with one of your boyfriends,” Loki said flatly, looking up from the book of spells he had taken from Asgard. “You have three rooms you could stay in other than this one, whereas I have nowhere else to go.” 

“What happened to living with Tony, anyway?” she asked, not for the first time, and Loki gave her an impatient glare. 

“I told you, it was a temporary arrangement that has come to an end.” 

“You never explained what the arrangement was,” she said pointedly. 

“Figure it out yourself, Widow Woman. You already won’t leave me alone, go spy on Tony for a change.” 

“I want you out of this room tonight or I will make Steve haul you out of here, and you know he can.” 

Loki slammed the book closed and got to his feet, tossing it onto the bed. “Fine. That’s just fine.” He grabbed his coat from a hook near the door, pulled it on, and took his staff from where it sat next to the hooks. “But Brunhilde isn’t coming to Club A with me, so you’re going to put up with her or I’m going to scatter your atoms across the campus before anyone even knows you’re in danger.” 

“Nice threat. Looking forward to seeing what Fury has to say about it.” Natasha said, her eyes hard. 

“Oh, please. Like you’re going to do anything with Fury other than pry into his secrets.” He turned on his heel and left the room, leaving Brunhilde sitting confused on his bed. 

Instead of dancing, which was, admittedly, one of his favorite hobbies, Loki sat at the bar in Club A with a neon blue drink sitting in front of him. Three umbrellas from similar drinks sat in a perfect row next to it. His head a little hazy, he realized someone had come to sit next to him. Before he could get up and take his drink with him, Janet tapped him on the shoulder. 

“You need to go talk to Tony,” she said, pointing over to the pool table where Tony, Rhodey, and Doreen were all playing together. “This has gone on long enough, it’s been almost a month.” 

Wearily, he looked from the pool table to Janet. “I need people to stop telling me what to do, is what I need. I am a god, I don’t have to listen to Midgardians,” he said, though his voice was toothless. He had, after all, listened to Natasha and vacated his room for the night. 

“You’re a jerk, is what you are.” Janet said after ordering herself a long island iced tea from the bartender. “You’re both acting like idiots and it’s starting to get on my nerves.” 

Loki raised a brow. Janet was famously protective of Tony, and to hear her call him an idiot was remarkably out of character. “Are you quite well?” he asked, a curious expression coming to his face and sticking there. 

“I’m fine, I’m just tired of my best friends not talking to one another.” 

Loki glanced at the pool table, where it was evident that Doreen was winning by a mile, and he tried not to stare as Tony sat dejectedly on a chair nearby.  

“And,” she added pointedly. “I’m tired of being lied to.” 

“And what have I lied to you about, Janet?” he asked wearily, downing the rest of his drink, placing the umbrella in the line, and asking the bartender for another. 

“Lying by omission is still lying. You won’t tell me a thing and I  _ know _ something is wrong.” She leaned in as the bartender placed the drink in front of him. “Tony tells me  _ everything _ , Loki, you know that.” 

With a start, Loki grabbed the drink and stood up, not having considered that Tony would have talked about what had passed between them. “I’m glad to know that nobody respects my privacy,” he said with a snarl, and taking the glass with him, stormed out of Club A, leaving Janet behind without another word. 

* * *

Loki woke from a nap at around five p.m. and groaned, stuffing his face into the pillow. He’d dreamt about Tony again, like he had been off and on for the past two months. 

The dreams were always pleasant, always warm and comfortable and kind. Tony on the sky ship, Tony in the gardens, Tony walking with him in the markets, and most of all the gentle press of Tony’s lips on his own. Several times he’d tried to use both sleeping spells and Midgardian sleep aids to sleep without dreaming, and nothing had worked. In the mornings he woke up feeling cold and empty and aching to go back to Tony. 

It was too late to apologize though. Not after two months of stonewalling him, not after two months of snapping at his friends. He was too embarrassed to admit that rejection had hurt deeply and had left him feeling like a fool. And he was baffled at the fact that he had misread every situation that had led up to that kiss. Why Tony had even done it if he was just going to tell him to forget it was a mystery that Loki both did and didn’t want an answer to. 

It would be enough when it was all over, when he could bury the attraction and feel strong enough to pretend everything was alright again. 

The dorm room door opened a crack and Loki looked down to see Brunhilde, dragging a large item of clothing in her teeth. This one was too big to be a sock, and to his dismay he realized that she had somehow gotten hold of a pair of Tony’s boxers and dragged them all the way across campus. They were black boxer briefs with a red floral trim around the waistline, and she had to struggle not to step on them given how much larger they were than Tony’s socks. 

“Oh, darling,” he said with a grimace, picking her up as she dropped them on the floor. “We’re going to have to do something about your fixation on his clothing. I buy you so many toys and you go and do this?” He stopped talking when Natasha entered the room and kicked the underwear under his bed, where Brunhilde darted after them as soon as he put her down. 

“So, I figured out what was going on,” Natasha said as she sat at her desk, opening up her macbook. “You two were dating.” 

Loki sat on the edge of his bed, glaring at her. “No we weren’t.” 

“There’s no other explanation for why you’d move in with him, then turn into a mess when you moved out.” Natasha didn’t look at him, her fingers moving rapidly over the keys. “Who rejected who?” she asked, and Loki’s mind immediately fixed on Tony’s apology and insistence that Loki forget that even happened. As if he could.

“How does it feel to be wrong all the time?” 

Natasha only scoffed. 

“And why does everyone think it’s acceptable to invade my privacy?” Loki asked sourly. “Like I’ve told you a dozen times. It was an arrangement. There was nothing romantic involved. If there was, do you really think I’d be back here? Who would reject a god, anyway? Look,” he leaned on his desk as he spoke to her. “I don’t pry into your relationships, and in general, I leave you alone. Why not try being more like me, for once, hmm?” 

“You know, we could be friends if you weren’t such an asshole,” Natasha said, looking up from whatever she was writing. “I don’t hate you or anything, I just like to know what’s going on.” 

“An understatement,” Loki scoffed, though part of him realized that she would be the best person to tell. While she wanted to know every secret there was to know, she didn’t go blabbing about them as she easily could have. “There was a misunderstanding,” he said carefully. “Not a romantic one,” he lied, “but it was deeply troubling and I felt like I could use some time apart from my friends until it blew over. That’s  _ all _ .” 

That seemed to almost satisfy Natasha, as he thought it might, given that he hadn’t said a word to her yet about what had happened in Asgard. “Here’s a deal. Go out again now and then and I’ll stop prying. You’re a decent roommate but I want a minute alone now and then, okay?” 

Loki offered her his hand. “I give you my word,” he said with a sardonic smile, and shook her hand, hoping one of them was telling the truth and greatly doubting that they were. 

* * *

“I don’t think this is going to work, Jan.” Tony sat in the booth at an old-fashioned diner across from Janet, who was tearing into a burger the size of her head. Tony dipped a fry into his chocolate milkshake, went to take a bite of it, then set it back down in the basket. “I’ve been miserable for three months, and we’ve only really started hanging out together again.” 

Janet grabbed a napkin to wipe ketchup off of her chin, chewed furiously, then said, “I know, and it’s driving me crazy, I just want everyone to be happy again.” 

“It’s going to be a long way to happy, I think,” Tony said as he pushed the basket towards Janet. “I don’t know that we’re going to be able to get back to normal any time soon, and it sucks.” 

“You know what would help things? If you talked to him,” Janet said before taking a sip from an extra large cup of soda. “This has gone on for  _ three months _ . That’s six times as long as your fake relationship. If you have feelings for him--”

“I don’t--” 

“Liar.  _ Because _ you have feelings for him, nothing is going to change until you work those out.” 

Tony cast his gaze out the window at the street outside, watching people walk by and glance at him. One person recognized him and pointed before taking a quick picture and grabbing the arm of the person they were with and chattering excitedly. He sighed. 

“I don’t know what to say.” He shrugged. “I fucked up hard and I don’t see a way to recover from that.” 

“I think you’re both making a mountain out of a molehill.” Janet said in between enormous bites of burger. “With the way he’s been moping, I think he might have feelings for you too. He’s not  _ angry, _ he’s depressed.” She pointed at him with what was left of the burger. “He won’t tell me anything, but I can read people and he’s not mad at you.”

Tony raked his hair back with his hand and sighed again. 

“So,” said Janet, picking up a fry and waggling it at Tony. “We’re all going to go out and do something as friends, me, you, Thor, and Loki, and we’re going to have a good time and you two are going to stop avoiding one another.” 

“What are you planning?” he asked warily. 

“We’re all going to Coney Island this weekend. It’s the last few days of fall so we need to get there before it starts getting cold.” With something on her face that looked like pleading, she reached across the table and grabbed Tony’s hand, smearing ketchup on it by accident. “I want us to all be friends again. Even if you two can’t work something out I don’t want us to be separated like this forever. I love you both a lot and I want you two to be happy again.” 

Though he wanted to continue to argue with Jan, it was impossible. Not when she was right, not when she was doing it because she cared, and not when she was adorably covered in ketchup. 

“Alright,” he said, handing her a napkin. “But I reserve the right to fly out of there if it gets too awkward.” 

“Ah, the patented Tony Stark avoidance strategy,” she said and shook her head. “Absolutely not. You’ve been putting this off for too long and I want to see you two  _ talk _ at least. He’s giving me the cold shoulder too, and I don’t like it, and I don’t think that’s going to stop before this gets addressed.” Janet used the ultimate weapon in her arsenal: puppy eyes and a pout, and Tony groaned quietly. 

“Fine. One day at Coney Island.” 

Janet clapped her hands with glee. “This is going to be  _ so fun _ , just you wait and see.” 


	18. Chapter 18

Though the day Janet picked to go to Coney Island was technically the first day of fall, it was the hottest day New York had experienced all year. Several times, Loki picked up the phone to call Jan and cancel, but in truth, despite the fact that rejection still hung heavy in Loki’s chest, he was looking forward to seeing Tony again. It had been too long, and had he been capable of telling himself the truth, he would have been able to admit that he missed him. 

Janet’s buttery yellow convertible parked outside the high-security dorm, and when Loki walked outside to meet her, he almost stopped in his tracks. The heat was oppressive, to be sure, which would not have been a problem if Loki had been as Asgardian as his brother, but as a frost giant, being outside was nearly unbearable. He was wearing a light summery shirt with gold embroidery on the hems, and had his hair pinned back with sparkling bobby pins to keep it off of his face. Having to dress outside of his normal attire was annoying, but getting to see the view in the back of the convertible was worth it. 

Sitting in the back seat was Tony, wearing jeans, a white tank top, and mirrored sunglasses. Loki’s gaze fell on his bare shoulders, on the glow of his arc reactor visible through the shirt, and, without warning, the memory of watching Tony blacksmithing in Nidavellir washed over him. The heat outside was oppressive as the heat had been in Nidavellir, sweat-inducing and difficult to breathe in, but that paled in comparison to the heat that was growing within Loki at the sight of Tony resting casually in the back of the convertible. 

Thankful that his sunglasses were opaque enough to hide his eyes, he stiffly moved towards Jan’s car and slid into the back seat. Tony smelled like coconut sunscreen and Loki gave him a tense smile as he buckled in. 

“Been a while,” Tony said with a prize-winning smile, and Loki simply nodded in response. 

In the front seat, Thor bellowed, “Brother! ‘Tis good to see you again. I have been trying to reach you but your phone must be broken. I have left a dozen messages!” 

“Yeah, must be something wrong with my mailbox,” Loki said flatly, knowing he had deleted every single one without listening to them. In the rearview mirror he could see Janet’s gaze, despite being obscured by large black sunglasses, flick up to him, and he gave her a smooth smile. 

“You should get that fixed! I was worried.” 

“I’m fine, as always, brother.” Loki glanced at Tony, who was looking at his cell phone. Tony caught Loki's gaze out of the corner of his eye and Tony's face warmed almost imperceptibly. 

“Have you ever been to Coney Island before? ” Tony asked as Janet began driving out of the campus. Sweat was beading on his forehead but he seemed to be taking the heat in stride. 

“No, and I’m starting to wonder if today is the best day for it. It’s as hot as it was in Nidavellir.” Loki held back before complaining that the air smelled like tar and piss, because again Janet’s gaze fell on him and he remembered his promise that he would try to at least act like he was having a good time. “But at least we can see the sky.” 

“How’ve you been doing?” Tony asked, turning away from his phone to look at Loki, his face pleasant enough. If Loki wasn’t imagining things, his gaze lingered on the line of Loki’s neck visible in the v-neck shirt, but he couldn’t be sure due to the fact that all he could see was his reflection in Tony’s sunglasses. 

“Oh, you know. Busy.” Loki crossed his legs and considered how to embellish. “The books I brought with me are all on sorcery, and all very dense and take time to absorb. If I want to improve my skills, it’s important that I read them.” 

“Practice is as important as theory though,” Tony said as he glanced out his side of the car. “You should test out your new uh, spells, or skills, or whatever you want to call them, in the training arena.” 

“Spells,” Loki said firmly. 

“I’d like to see what you’ve come up with since our fight.”

Loki looked away from him, watching New York pass by outside of the rolled-down window. Remembering the fight was not on his list of things he wanted to do that day, but the image of Tony on his knees, grabbing the sword and pointing to his arc reactor--to his heart--was as fresh in his mind as it had been the night they had fought. With a sigh, Loki pulled a handkerchief out of his pocket and dabbed his forehead, already convinced that this was going to be a miserable day in between trying to bear with the heat and Tony’s outfit. 

If there had been any question about how much he was into Tony, the mixture of relief and aching desire in his heart at seeing him was enough to put Loki in his place when it came to trying to lie to himself. Being near him again felt good, felt right, and it made those three months of aching seem like a foolish venture that could have been avoided had he just been able to say the right thing. 

He opened his mouth to speak, then belatedly remembered his brother sitting in the front seat. Something else occurred to him then, and he tried to catch Janet’s eyes in the rearview mirror, needing to speak with her desperately before anything else happened. However, Janet had her eyes on the road as Thor absently stroked the back of her neck as she drove. 

As soon as they parked in a garage nearly a mile away from Coney Island, Loki pulled Janet aside and whispered harshly, “Did you tell Thor that the relationship was fake, or does he still believe that we’re dating?” 

“It’s not up to me to tell your brother you were lying,” Janet whispered under her breath. “But he’s not expecting you and Tony to make out or something.” Loki’s face was stricken at that and he brought his hands to his face to rub his temples. 

“I suppose I’m lucky he’s an oblivious oaf, then,” Loki said as he dropped his hands to his side. 

With that, Janet punched him in the shoulder, much harder than he would have expected her capable of, and he rubbed it while glaring at her pointedly. “Be. Nice,” she said firmly, and with a click of the key fob closed the convertible hood and locked the car.

“Yes ma’am,” he said with a mock salute, then headed back to the car where Tony was sliding out of the back seat. “Guess what,” he said quietly as Thor joined Janet in front of the car. Janet reached up and adjusted the big sun hat Thor was wearing with a smile as Loki and Tony looked on. “My brother still thinks we’re a couple.” 

“Oh.” Tony’s brows rose a little, and he watched as Janet stood on her toes to plant a small kiss on Thor’s lips. They both had that tender-eyed look of someone in love as Thor brushed her hair out of her face, terribly gentle despite his size. “Well, you did say once that it would be easier to convince your brother than anyone else. I’m sure we don’t have to say or do anything to keep him from getting suspicious.” 

“It doesn’t matter what he thinks either way,” Loki said as they began walking, his brow furrowed slightly. “But I’d rather not ruin the day for Jan.” 

“That’s downright decent of you, Loki,” Tony said as they all exited the parking garage, squinting behind their sunglasses as the bright sun assaulted them. “I would feel your forehead to see if you had a fever but something tells me I might not get an accurate reading.” 

“Ha ha,” Loki said flatly, gracefully winding around the crowd heading the same way they were. After a quick walk they were on the boardwalk, surrounded by all the trappings of tourist heaven. Food stands were everywhere, advertising everything from cotton candy, to bacon wrapped hot dogs, to fried everything, and dozens of things in between. Two roller coasters and a ferris wheel stood on the edges of the boardwalk, all with lines that stretched on for what looked like half a mile. Games were set up, both tests of strength and agility and those based on random chance, all surrounded by stuffed animals one could win if they did well enough. Vendors sold balloons, and glow sticks, and other souvenirs by the barrel. 

The crowd around them was cheerful despite the heat. Parents with small children led them around by the hand, pointing out interesting things. Couples walked holding hands, getting in the way of traffic as people tried to pass by, and large family groups of tourists stopped to take pictures of everything. Even though it was hot enough to fry an egg on the sidewalk, spirits were still high at Coney Island. 

“So, what do you want to do first?” Tony asked as he came to stand next to Jan. Loki hung back as the three of them gathered to discuss, glancing around at the food stalls, the crowd, the seagulls accosting a young woman with french fries--anything but Tony’s bare arms and shoulders. 

“I don’t know,” she glanced around rapidly for a moment before pulling out a map of the area she had printed at home. After a moment of searching, she grabbed Thor’s hand and said, “I want to play some games!” She they began to drag him off, easily moving him despite her size compared to his. 

Loki trailed behind until Tony fell into step next to him. “So, have you heard from your mom since Asgard?” Tony asked, and while his tone was pleasant, Loki got the feeling he was being ambushed. 

“I haven’t told her that anything has changed, if that’s what you’re wondering,” he said, bristling a little. “I wanted some time to pass, for the memories of the visit to cool down before I told her it was over.” 

“I just meant if you had heard if she was doing well.” 

Loki eyed him curiously. “She’s fine, why do you ask?” 

“I just liked getting to know her. She reminds me of my mom a little bit,” Tony said, his face a hair wistful as they walked together towards the game Janet had chosen. She was now standing under an awning, holding a dart in one hand, eyeballing a long wall covered in balloons she was meant to pop. 

“I’ll tell her you asked after her,” he said as they came to stand next to Janet and Thor. “I’m sure she’ll be happy to hear it.” Loki watched as Janet inexpertly threw a dart that bounced off a red balloon and tumbled to the ground. “Which stuffed animal do you want, Jan?” he asked as he approached the line from which one was supposed to throw the darts. 

“Oh, no, it’s okay.” Having thrown her last dart, Janet shook her head and stepped away from the line. 

“Hypothetically, if I were to win one of these stuffed animals, which one would you like most?” he asked as he pulled out his wallet and handed two dollars to the man running the booth. Jan looked up at the toys where they hung, somewhat morbidly, off the edge of the awning. 

“That little blue bear,” she said finally, and Loki turned to the man running the booth, who was wearing both a Coney Island hat and a completely unamused expression. 

“How many balloons do I need to pop to win the blue bear?” he asked. 

“Three, and don’t step over the red line,” the man replied, sounding just as done as he looked. 

“Please, what do you take me for, some kind of cheater?” Loki scoffed, and without hesitation, threw the darts in rapid succession, popping a balloon with all three before walking back to the man running the stand and handing back the unused two darts. “I’ll take that blue bear, now.” 

With a long hook, the proprietor removed the blue bear from the awning and handed it to Loki, seemingly unimpressed by the display. Thor, however, shouted “Well done, brother!” with genuine pride. 

With a roll of his eyes, Loki handed the bear to Jan gently, smiling when she took it. 

“Aw, thank you Loki. You sure showed those balloons who’s boss,” Janet teased as did the best she could to stuff the bear in her purse, just the top of its head peeking out once she was done. 

“Win me something next time,” Tony said from behind Loki as he came up and threw a sweaty arm around his shoulder. 

“Of course,” said Loki, trying to will himself not to flush at the sensation of Tony’s warm arm on the back of his neck. “What was I thinking?” 

* * *

For a while they roamed the boardwalk, mostly following Janet’s meandering lead. They stopped at a few games. One where you pulled small wooden ducks with numbers painted on the bottom from a children’s pool caught Janet’s eye, and she spent six dollars trying to match the numbers with the ones that corresponded with prizes. She frowned dejectedly when she wasn’t able to win prizes larger than the consolation ones, her purse filling up with plastic necklaces, party favors, and other small plastic toys. Loki offered to win another prize for her but she refused. 

Instead, they moved on to a game where a long pole stood with a bell on the top, and one had to hit the base with a hammer to move a ball up the to the bell. 

“HA!” Thor strode up to the game with Janet at his side. “Now  _ this _ is a game worthy of an Asgardian,” he said as he stood in front of the woman holding the long-handled, heavy looking hammer. 

“Brother, hold a moment,” Loki said, having a hunch and putting his hand on Thor’s shoulder to stop him. “Let the rest of us have a go before you embarrass us with your clearly superior strength,” he said, something sly in his voice. Thor blinked, but gave a hearty laugh and clapped Loki on the back so hard that he stumbled forward a few steps. 

“Of course, of course! Take your turns and have fun before I beat you all,” he said with a grin and no malice.

The woman running the game eyed them curiously. “Who’d like to go first?” she asked, hefting the heavy hammer onto her shoulder, showing off some impressive muscles in her arms. 

“Oh, me!” Janet hopped a few times excitedly and offered the woman the three dollars necessary to play the game before taking the hammer from her. She wobbled a little at the weight, but once she got herself situated she managed to swing the hammer down onto the base, making the ball raise up to the lowest number on the pole. 

“Hey, not bad!” said the proprietor, and pulled a paper noisemaker out from a box sitting on a table next to her. She offered it to Jan who took it eagerly, popped the plastic end into her mouth, and blew, unfurling the paper spiral at the end. 

Tony went next, squaring his shoulders as he took the hammer, giving an appreciative glance at the woman who had easily lifted it onto her shoulders once he realized how heavy it was. After two practice swings, he brought the hammer onto the base, and the ball jumped up one third of the pole. Seeing Tony with the hammer struck Loki in two ways. One, he couldn’t help but be reminded of Thor with Mjolnir, and a sour taste filled his mouth. However, the flex in Tony’s arms brought back more memories of Nidavellir, and Loki looked away, trying not to remember the feeling of sitting there watching him, drowning in lust. 

“Even better!” said the woman running the booth, clearly more into her job than the man at the dart game. She dug around into the box and pulled out a wind-up toy duck and handed it over. Tony gave Janet the duck to stick in her purse, which was already overflowing with small toys. 

“Well, let’s see if I can do better than that,” said Loki, taking the hammer and, without giving it a practice swing, slammed it down onto the base just hard enough to hit the bell at the top. Applause broke out from the small crowd who had gathered to watch and wait their turn, and the proprietor laughed. 

“Great job! It’s always the ones you don’t expect, isn’t it?” Loki rolled his eyes and took his prize, a pin with the words “I won the Coney Island test of strength” on it, as well as the money he had used to pay for his turn. 

“Now it’s my turn,” said Thor, a little too eagerly, and Loki stepped back away from the game. 

“This does not bode well,” Loki said as he came to stand beside Tony again. Tony took the pin from him and pinned it to Loki’s shirt, and for a moment, Loki forgot what he was saying. 

“What’s the matt--” 

“Thor, no no no, you have to use the hammer they provide,” Janet said, somewhat panicked as Thor had raised his hand to summon Mjolnir. “You don’t need Mjolnir. This will be easy enough without it.” 

“You are right, my beloved. I accept the challenge!” He took the hammer with a smile, hefted it over his head, and brought it down so hard onto the game that the base cracked in two and the bell flew off the top when the ball hit it. The crowd screamed in a mixture of sports fan delight and a little panic as the bell began to fall. In a flash, Loki was in position to catch it so it didn’t hit anyone, and with an apologetic smile, he handed it to the proprietor, who was still looking at Thor in shock and dismay. 

Tony stepped up immediately and pulled his wallet out of his pocket, extracting a business card and handing it to the woman who now had a broken game. “Hey, I’m Tony Stark, nice to meet you. Just send a bill to this address and I’ll make things right, okay?” 

She nodded numbly and handed Thor a button. 

“That, is why it did not bode well.” Loki said as Tony returned. “I anticipated this happening from the moment I saw the game. My brother has no finesse. He’s just a big, dumb, ox who still doesn’t know his own strength.” 

“Come on, be nice,” Tony said, and Loki rolled his eyes. 

“I do wish everyone would stop saying that.” 

“I know you’re capable of it,” Tony said, and Loki turned away, wanting to reply that Tony seemed like the only one who believed that, but holding his tongue. Belatedly, Loki realized that Janet was trotting off towards a food stand boasting fried seafood.

“We’d better follow her before she eats all the shrimp,” Loki said, his heart leaping when Tony took him by the hand and began to lead him away from the broken strength contest. He considered telling Tony it wasn’t necessary to touch him, but the sensation of Tony’s hand in his own, squeezing gently as he tugged him away from the game, eased the ache in his chest just enough that he couldn’t say a word. 

* * *

The four of them found a round table with an umbrella over it and sat down for a while. The wind had changed and a weak but blessedly cool breeze passed over them as they ate. Loki and Janet sat on either side of an enormous paper platter of food that was all same crispy golden brown color. Fried shrimp, fried clams, fried cod, and french fries were piled high, and little bowls of tartar sauce, cocktail sauce, and ketchup all sat in a row between them. 

Tony, who was eating a hot dog, watched as Janet dug in, first popping a shrimp into her mouth before dipping half a dozen fries into ketchup and stuffing them in there too. “You two are never going to finish that,” he said, keeping one eye on Thor who had ordered the same platter for himself and had already demolished half of it. 

“Oh ye of little faith,” said Janet. “You underestimate exactly how much I like fried shrimp.” Loki only nodded, dipping a nugget of deep-fried cod into the tartar sauce before eating it. “Anyway, this is just the main course. There’s funnel cake, and corn dogs, and ice cream, and cotton candy...” 

Tony got the feeling that Janet would have continued rattling off carnival food if she hadn’t been so intent on eating it, so he gave her a moment to devour before trying to talk to her again. Instead, he watched Loki as he ate, barely registering that he  _ was _ eating because all he could see was his skin through the diaphanous white shirt, the long line of his neck and the sparkle of the bobby pins holding his hair out of his face. Seeing him like this was intensely interesting, just as seeing him out of his usual coat and slacks tended to be, and Tony’s thoughts floated back to Asgard where he could see Loki being presented to the court in his mind’s eye. That led to memories of the dance, with Loki’s hand firm on his back, his fingers on the back of his neck, and Tony felt his chest begin to ache as he stared. 

It took them a little more time than it had Thor, but Janet and Loki easily polished off the plate together. 

“Oh god that was so salty,” Janet said as she took a drink from a huge paper cup of water she had been carrying. “I need something sweet now.” Thor got to his feet at that, asked her what she wanted, and when she said cotton candy he marched off to the nearest food stall selling it. 

“Where do you put all that?” Tony asked Janet, giving her a playful nudge. 

“Hollow leg,” she said with a grin, and out of the corner of his eye Tony realized Loki was staring. He glanced away when Tony met his eyes. 

After a moment, Thor returned with a bright pink puff of cotton candy on a paper cone, the mass of spun sugar easily bigger than Janet’s head. Loki reached to grab a piece but Janet smacked his hand and pulled it closer to herself, stuffing her face into it and taking a huge bite. 

“Suit yourself,” Loki said, and sat back a little on the bench. 

Janet worked her way through the cotton candy and pulled a bottle of sunscreen out of her purse. “We should all reapply, or else we’re going to end up like lobsters,” she said, and squeezed a bit of the sunscreen into her hand. She passed it around the table until it came back to her, and Tony realized Loki was staring at him as he put it on. This time, his gaze took longer to falter, and when it did, Loki glanced over to where Thor was applying sunscreen to Janet’s bare back. Still, Tony had felt the weight of that stare and he couldn’t help but wonder if he hadn’t been right about Loki’s intentions all along, no matter what had happened that night in the throne room. 

* * *

True to her word, Janet had managed to eat a hefty amount of food, stopping only after buying from half a dozen stalls and she polishing off the rest of the funnel cake that she and Loki were sharing. 

“I still don’t know how you managed that,” Tony said as they walked towards the brightly painted carousel. “I would have gotten sick after the crab fries.” 

“I highly doubt that; you don’t get sick after kale smoothies, after all,” Loki said, glancing at him with a teasing smirk, and Loki was reminded of all the times Tony had offered a kale smoothie in the morning while Loki stood in front of the stove, wearing his pajamas, making breakfast for the two of them. Three months without waking up to Tony stumbling into the kitchen, with sleep-mussed hair and bleary eyes had been heartbreaking. For his part, Tony only chuckled, and Loki wondered if he missed those breakfasts too. 

“Clearly I’m made of stronger stuff than you,” Jan teased, and ruffled Tony’s sweat-damp hair as they walked. At the carousel she picked a pink horse with a golden mane and sat on it while Thor took pictures with his cell phone whenever she came around to his side, waving eagerly. Loki watched the way Thor looked at her, with bright eyes and a content smile, then glanced at Tony who was also watching. He wished, not for the first time, but perhaps for the first time he was willing to be honest with himself about it, that he could have with Thor had with Janet. It was overly sappy and disgustingly romantic. But all he wanted was to grab Tony and tell him he wasn’t allowed to take back the kiss on the throne. It could have been different. It could have been three months of getting closer instead of barely saying a word to one another, and the loss of that opportunity struck Loki profoundly. 

Loki shook his head and turned away, wondering if he should make an escape into the crowd when he felt someone’s hand on his shoulder. He turned to see Tony looking at him with furrowed brows. 

“Where’d Thor go?” he asked, and Loki shrugged. 

“I haven’t the slightest idea. Wasn’t he just here?” 

“Yeah, he was taking pictures of Janet, but we can’t find him now.” 

“I’m sure he’ll return when he finds his way back from wherever he wandered off to.” He paused. “She should really keep him on a leash.” Tony coughed awkwardly into his hand and turned back to where Janet was getting off of the carousel. 

Even from his position further back, Loki could see that she was green around the gills, and she held her stomach as she walked towards them, a pleading look on her face. 

“Okay hon, let’s get you to the nearest trash can,” Tony said as he gently led her away from the carousel and as far away from the crowd as he could. Despite not following them, Loki could still hear her retching and, with some sympathy, belatedly realized he probably shouldn’t have encouraged her to try more food. 

“Alright,” Tony said as they returned, Janet a sickly shade of pale as he led her with a hand on the small of her back. “Let’s find you some shade and some water, okay?” Tony glanced at Loki, who took the cue and went to the nearest food stand for a bottle of cold water. 

Finding another umbrella-covered table near the ferris wheel, Loki handed her the bottle as she sat down. Instead of drinking it, she pressed it up against her forehead and pouted a little, wiping her mouth with some tissues she had pulled out of her overflowing purse. 

“You guys don’t have to sit with me,” she said after she had drank half the water and color had returned to her cheeks. “I texted Thor so he’ll be back soon. Why don’t you ride the ferris wheel or something?” 

“Are you sure?” Tony asked with concern, and Janet nodded. 

“Yeah, I’m just going to let my stomach rest a little bit before we start to get going, but I don’t want you guys to miss out on anything.” 

“Okay.” Tony glanced at Loki, something inscrutable in his eyes as they met Loki’s. “Let’s go take a ride on the ferris wheel.” 

* * *

 

The ferris wheel at Coney Island was famous for several reasons. For one, it was nearly a hundred years old, and stood tall as the highest landmark in Coney Island, visible from all areas of the boardwalk. Secondly, it had famously survived the fire that had burned half of the park to the ground. It also boasted two different experiences: one, a traditional ferris wheel ride with stationary cars, and two, a row of cars that slid up and down the spokes as the wheel spun. 

“The line is enormous,” Loki said, but Tony had his hand and was pulling him and no matter how much stronger Loki was than Tony he couldn’t seem to stop him as he tugged. 

They waited in line in silence, Loki tapping a foot impatiently as the line slowly moved forward. “Why are we doing this again?” he asked, glancing at Tony at his side. 

“Because it’s an experience and we shouldn’t leave Coney Island without doing it at least once.” 

That mollified Loki and they continued to wait in line without speaking until they reached the head of the line and were led into one of the cars. Tony chose an outer cart and Loki sat across from him, belatedly realizing how long they were going to be alone together and wondering if he was going to be able to handle that. The cart was caged in from all sides and it felt very small and very close as it began to move. 

Loki stared out the side of the car, looking out at Coney Island as it began to shrink while he rose above it. He could just see Thor coming to Janet’s side, and instead looked out at the city while the ferris wheel climbed to the top. The noise of the crowd quieted a little and then it was just the breeze and Tony sitting across from him, their knees brushing as Loki’s legs were too long for the short distance between them. 

“Loki,” Tony said, and Loki glanced to see him with his elbows on his knees, leaning forward with his hands laced together. “I wanted to be alone with you.” 

“Well, you’ve certainly succeeded,” Loki said, his stomach dropping as nerves began to crackle through him. 

Tony’s gaze flicked up and he met Loki’s eyes, holding his gaze until Loki looked away nervously. But he was silent until the ferris wheel reached the top and stopped. “Was I imagining everything that happened in Asgard? The way you treated me, the way you touched me...” 

Loki’s face looked stricken as he tore his gaze away, color beginning to rise on his cheeks. He had thought that he had been successful at pushing Tony out of his mind, but he had been lying to himself about how miserably he was failing. 

Loki, swallowing hard, and giving Tony a pleading gaze, shook his head no. 

“It’s a thousand degrees outside,”Tony said, “I had to pay for a broken game, and I just held my best friend’s hair as she threw up into a trash can.” Loki sucked in a deep breath as Tony reached up and touched his cheek. “Yet his is still the best day I’ve had in months, and it’s because I got to see you again.” Tony cupped Loki’s cheek, his fingertips brushing his ear, and it was all Loki could do not to lean into that touch as butterflies burst to life in his stomach. 

 Tony leaned in then, their knees pressing together as he rubbed his thumb across Loki’s cheek. Gently, terribly gently, Tony brushed his lips against Loki’s. 

Without thinking, Loki grabbed the back of his head and pulled him closer, colliding with him in a kiss that he only hazily thought might have been deeper than Tony had intended.

Tony’s lips were as soft as he remembered, his mouth warm and pliable. It seemed like that moment lasted for hours, with Tony’s mouth moving lightly against his own, Tony’s hand in his hair, and their bodies just inches apart. Everything around them seemed to disappear. They were simply hovering above the ground together, breathing heavily through their noses, Loki only pulling away when that wasn’t enough and he needed to gasp for breath. “Don’t tell me to forget this one,” he whispered, drawing closer to Tony, resting their sweaty foreheads together.

“I won’t,” Tony said just as quietly as he slid his hand behind Loki’s neck and squeezed gently. “I missed you,” he whispered, and the ache in Loki’s chest burst into a thousand tiny pinpricks of light that ran down his body from his head to his toes. 

Loki said nothing, just kissed him again, this time sliding his tongue easily into Tony’s mouth and sighing through his nose as Tony held his head close. When he finally pulled away, Tony’s cheeks were bright red, his lips wet, and his expression soft but hungry. Excitement was swirling in Loki’s stomach and he had the passing thought that if they weren’t in public he probably would have already had his hands under that tank top. He was starving, the pent up desire roaming free within him, though there was a certain amount of relief as the ferris wheel jerked to life and began to descend. 

“Tony, I--” Loki tried to speak, but couldn’t get words out. 

“Tony, not Anthony?” Tony asked, surprised, and Loki only rested his forehead against Tony’s, his eyes closed. He felt Tony’s hand running over his sweat-damp hair and sighed lightly. 

“How long?” he whispered, nuzzling up against Tony’s face when he kissed him lightly on the cheek. 

“Oh, I don’t know.” Tony said as he carefully pulled away, stopping for one more kiss when Loki yanked him near again. “Maybe in Asgard. Maybe before. It’s hard to say, I just--” 

Loki nodded, running the back of his knuckles down Tony’s shoulder, thinking again about Nidavellir, about the fantasies of holding him down. Desire was burning bright in his belly, but so did a terribly tender feeling that moved through him like electricity when they kissed again, the ferris wheel slowly bringing them back down to earth. 

“Later,” Tony said when Loki drew near to him again. “When you don’t taste exactly like popcorn shrimp anymore.” Loki let out something between a scoff and a breathless laugh, and nodded.  _ Later _ , he had said. Later meant more, and Loki  _ needed _ more, but he could be patient as long as the promise was fulfilled. 

Somewhat dazed, Loki walked with Tony back to where Jan sat on the bench, now with Thor at her side, fanning her with the large hat he had taken off. She was holding a second bottle of water to her forehead as Thor looked on in concern, but she smiled up at Loki and Tony when they approached. 

“Oh no. Tony, didn’t you use sunscreen on your face too? You’re as red as a lobster. Your skin is going to peel so badly,” she said as he came to sit beside her on the bench. 

“I’ll be okay. How are you doing though?” 

“I’m okay,” she said, unscrewing the cap of the water bottle and taking a sip. “But I’m hot and tired and I want to go home.” 

Tony nodded and rubbed her back a little with one hand. “Then we should get going, I think we’ve seen everything you can see in one day anyway. We can always come back when it’s not so hot.” 

Then, as though summoned by Tony’s words, Loki felt a fat raindrop fall onto his forehead. He looked up and realized that the clouds must have gathered while he and Tony were on the ferris wheel, and squinted as a raindrop hit him in the eye. 

“Brother,” he said warily, looking at Thor out of the corner of his eye. “This isn’t you, is it?” 

“Not today,” he said with a grin. “It seems that Midgard itself has had enough of the heat.” 

Within an instant, the sky had opened up and ran began to pour down in sheets. Thor placed the floppy hat on Janet’s head to protect her from the rain, but Loki, with no such protection, felt his hair begin to stick to the back of its neck as it got wet. 

“We have to walk a mile in this,” Loki said flatly as Janet got up. 

“At least it’s cooling everything down a little,” Tony said, and when Loki glanced at him he had to look away immediately stricken by the fact that Tony’s tank top was plastered to his chest, clinging to the rim of his arc reactor and his small, hard nipples. It was all he could do not to yank him near, to feel his body closer, but he didn’t want to make out with Tony in front of Thor and Janet, so he closed his eyes for a moment, thinking of Tony’s promise for  _ later _ . 

By the time they reached the parking garage, they were all soaked through completely, even their socks squelching unpleasantly in wet shoes. Getting out of the rain had been just as much of a relief as getting out of the sun had been, but Janet had to blast the air conditioning to cool down the overheated car before it was comfortable to sit in. 

Loki looked at Tony as Janet drove them back to campus, at his wet hair flat against his head, at his sunburnt nose, and at the droplets of water clinging to his eyelashes and though the desire to kiss him was powerful he satisfied himself by taking his hand. Tony glanced at him for a moment with a smile and rubbed Loki’s thumb with his own. 

Rain pounded down on the roof of the convertible as Loki held Tony’s hand and finally felt something akin to true happiness pulsing in his chest. 


	19. Chapter 19

Drenched from the mile-long walk in the torrential rain--a walk wherein Loki had completely forgotten he could summon an umbrella if he wanted it--Loki and Tony sat in relative silence in the backseat of Jan’s convertible, Tony’s hand in Loki’s, Loki’s heart in his throat. Loki watched as a droplet of water trickled off of Tony’s hair and down his ear, and while the last thing he wanted to do was make out with him in front of his brother, he leaned in as if to whisper to him and instead caught that droplet of water with his tongue when it threatened to drip off of Tony’s earlobe. 

Tony turned to look at him fast, his face red, but his eyes were hungry, and Loki was satisfied at the fact that he had been able to inspire that gaze, so he sat back onto the seat, smiling a wolf’s smile until they reached campus again.  

“Are you sure you don’t need me to drive you back to the dorm?” Janet asked, somewhat puzzled when Loki got out of the car at Stark Tower. 

“There’s a few things I need to do,” Loki responded, managing to keep himself from glancing at Tony. “I’ll probably get back there when the rain stops.” 

“Okay,” Janet said, her gaze flicking curiously from Loki to Tony, but she simply drove off once they were halfway to the doors. 

Tingling desire tore through Loki as they walked calmly to the elevator together, and as soon as the elevator doors closed, Loki had Tony against the mirrored wall, tracing the path of a droplet of water on his neck in reverse, his tongue on his clavicle and moving upwards towards his neck. Once he reached the point between Tony’s neck and jaw, a burst of electricity flowed through him as Tony tilted his head to the opposite side to give him space. Loki bit down lightly, sucked the mark, and moved to kiss Tony again, stopping when he remembered what he’d said on the ferris wheel. 

Registering now that Tony’s hands were gripping either side of his hips, he brushed his lips gently against Tony’s, letting him pull him closer. “Do I need to brush my teeth or--” he was cut off as Tony’s mouth met his own, Tony’s tongue sliding easily between his lips. With a light groan Loki cupped the back of Tony’s head, fingers in his wet hair. 

It was then that the elevator dinged and the doors opened onto the third floor. Hesitating for a second, Tony released Loki’s hips and grabbed him by the wrist, tugging him out of the elevator. Loki followed him, his breath heavy as fantasies of exactly what he was going to do to Tony ran through his head. 

To Loki’s surprise, instead of pulling him back towards his own bedroom, Tony led him to the nearest room to the elevator--the room Loki had been staying in before he moved back to the dorms. Loki followed, expecting the room to have been converted back into its dull, modern design, and nearly starting in surprise when he realized Tony hadn’t changed a thing. The dark wood headboard and dresser were still there, as was the enormous bed made up with rich green blankets. 

“You left it like it was,” Loki said, for a moment pausing, and Tony simply nodded. 

“I thought you might come back at some point, even if it was just to stay the night once or twice,” Tony said, moving to stand in front of him and slide his hands around his neck, brushing his jaw with either thumb. 

“Did you want me to come back?” Loki demanded, taking a step closer to Tony and looking down at him. 

Hesitating for a second, Tony looked up at Loki through thick eyelashes, sparkling with rainwater, and as he was halfway through saying yes, Loki was kissing him again. Knowing that he was  _ wanted _ , that was a heady and somewhat confusing feeling, and Loki was barely able to address it through the haze of lust that had him wanting Tony on the bed underneath him, Tony naked, Tony with his eyes half-lidded and lips parted in desire. 

So instead of saying anything, Loki slid his hands up underneath Tony’s wet tank top, drawing a gasp from him when his hands brushed over his nipples. Tony shifted to put his hands over his head so Loki could pull it off, and for a second Loki stood back to admire him, his leanly muscled arms and shoulders, the hair on his belly, the scars surrounding the arc reactor. He thought that if he got to see the rest he might very well go mad, but he was certain he would without it. 

With his hands on Tony’s bare sides, he bent down to press his lips to Tony’s shoulder, to drag them down his bicep until he nipped at it before moving to Tony’s chest. He dragged the flat of his tongue over one of Tony’s nipples, and felt Tony’s hand bury itself in his hair, tugging almost too hard as his fingers tangled up with the wet hair and bobby pins, and Loki pulled himself backwards, put up one finger in a “wait” motion, and took a moment to pull the bobby pins out of his hair and place them on the dresser. 

Satisfied now that Tony wouldn’t get his hands stuck around the bobby pins anymore, Loki noticed with amusement that Tony was unbuttoning his shirt, his face screwed up in concentration as his hands, slightly shaky, worked the buttons. 

Loki pressed his mouth to Tony’s ear, groaning slightly into it at the sensation of Tony’s fingers against his bare skin once his shirt was open. “Tell me that you want me,” he whispered, and felt a small shudder run through Tony’s body. 

There was a slight pause as Tony’s fingers trailed down Loki’s belly, touching the diamond in his belly button before stopping when he reached the waistband of his tight black jeans. He curled one finger into that waistband and tugged, drawing near to Loki so that their chests touched. 

This time, Tony had his mouth on Loki’s neck as he murmured, “I want you.” 

“How badly?” Loki asked as he slid his hands down Tony’s back, over his ass before giving it a nice hard squeeze through his jeans. 

“Right now,” said Tony against his neck, and a small shudder poured down Loki’s spine. 

“That wasn’t the question,” Loki said, raking his fingers through Tony’s hair and pulling his head back so he could look him in the eyes. “How  _ badly _ do you want me?” 

“So badly that I can’t even think straight,” Tony replied. “Stop asking questions.” 

“I’ll stop when I want to stop,” Loki replied with a bemused smile that was cut off as he sucked air through his teeth when he felt Tony’s hand unzip his jeans and slide down into them. 

Tony stopped, almost startled as his hand cupped Loki’s half-hard cock. “You’re not wearing any--” 

“An astute observation,” Loki replied, taking his own hand and putting it over Tony’s, making him squeeze lightly as, for a moment, his awareness fluttered away at the sweet sensation of Tony’s warm hand against his skin. “Take off your jeans, and get on the bed,” he said once he could think straight again, and Tony retracted his hand so he could do so, stripping down to black boxer briefs and climbing onto the bed as he was told. There was no trepidation in Tony’s movements, and he kept his gaze on Loki, his eyes expectant and eager. 

For the briefest moment Loki just looked at him as he propped himself up on the pillows, watching Loki expectantly. Tony’s body was utterly delicious--the scars, the hair on his belly and legs, the firm shoulders and muscular thighs--and he wanted to remember that view of him lying there waiting for him for later. Satisfied that he would be able to close his eyes and see that long after they had finished, he tugged himself out of his tight, wet jeans, and climbed onto the bed on top of him, still wearing his unbuttoned shirt. 

“Jesus, look at you,” Tony said as Loki came to straddle him, one knee on either side of his thighs, hands pushing into the pillow on either side of his head. Loki cocked his head to the side, somewhat confused, and Tony lowered his voice. “You’re beautiful.” 

Loki closed his eyes as a shudder wracked through him, and for a second he just crouched there on all fours, wanting to absorb those words before he proceeded. He reached up to brush a thumb across Tony’s lower lip, but Tony grabbed his wrist and took his first two fingers into his mouth, sucking on them lightly, tongue flicking in between them as Loki groaned at the sensation. 

“By all the realms,” he whispered, and slid his fingers deeper into Tony’s mouth, Tony easily taking them despite the fact that Loki’s fingertips brushed the back of his throat.  _ Oh _ , Loki thought,  _ now that is a good thing to know _ . 

Loki pulled his hand back, trailing his wet fingers down Tony’s chest and over his nipple, relishing the small sound that came from Tony’s throat when he rolled it between his thumb and forefinger. Despite that reaction though, there was something he wanted more, and he lowered himself so he could bite down on Tony’s bicep. Situating himself with a knee between Tony’s legs, he sucked on the skin before moving down his arm, dragging his tongue from his bicep, down his forearm, to his wrist, where he bit down again, gently, and sighed contentedly through his nose. 

He glanced up to see Tony watching him, his lips parted and his chest moving faster than normal as he took deep, rapid breaths. Loki worked his way back up his arm before pressing his lips on his shoulder and moving his mouth to his neck again, licking his warm skin before bringing his teeth down carefully. 

“Harder,” Tony said, and that word warmed Loki just enough that the electric desire within him dropped to his belly, and as he bit down hard on Tony’s neck, drawing a moan from him, Loki felt that his cock was now fully hard. 

“You like it hard?” He whispered, and Tony nodded rapidly. “Then maybe I’ll give it to you that way,” he said in response to the nod, pressing his knee further up so Tony could grind down on it, but Loki stopped him from doing so with a hand on each hip, squeezing hard enough to leave indentations from his fingertips. “Or maybe. I’ll. Just. Make. You. Wait,” he said firmly, pressing a kiss first to his clavicle, then one down his chest with each word until he hit his iliac furrow and dragged his tongue down it to where it disappeared into his boxer briefs. 

Without taking them off, Loki ran his tongue up the length of Tony’s hard cock, barely brushing it through the cotton, and Tony groaned as he looked down at him, throwing his head back when they met eyes, as if seeing Loki down there was too much for him to handle. Still through the boxer briefs, he took the very tip of Tony’s cock into his mouth, experimentally dragging his teeth over it, terribly gently, to see what Tony’s reaction would be. For his part, Tony groaned hard and dropped his hand down to grab Loki’s hair, to try to push him closer, but Loki easily kept Tony from moving him. Tony groaned, breathlessly saying Loki’s name with just a touch of pleading in his voice, and instead of touching him further, he hooked his thumbs into the waistband of Tony’s underwear, yanking them down and waiting patiently as Tony awkwardly kicked them off. 

Loki was enamored by the view, and ran his fingertips up Tony’s hard cock where it lay on his belly, blood-flushed and in good proportion to the rest of Tony’s body. Tony shivered and lifted his hips to press himself into Loki’s waiting hand, grabbing him by the back of the neck and pressing his lips to Loki’s ear, his breath hot and fast. 

Next to Tony, Loki laid down onto his back and coaxed Tony on top of him, adjusting himself so that Tony had one leg between his own and yanking him down by the hips again so that Tony’s cock pressed into Loki’s belly. Tony groaned at the contact and thrusted against his stomach. Releasing Tony’s hips, Loki pulled him down for a kiss, first licking his bottom lip before filling Tony’s mouth with his tongue and rocking his hips up against Tony’s body. 

For a moment they laid there together, thrusting against one another’s stomachs, Loki’s hands dropping to grab Tony’s ass and encourage him to go faster, harder. As Tony ground against him, Loki slipped two fingers between his cheeks to stroke him between them, and two things happened simultaneously. The first was that Tony, moaning surprisingly loudly, jerked against Loki’s body a few times before nearly collapsing onto him, and the second was that as soon as that happened, Tony told him to stop. 

Loki did, touching the small of his back instead while realizing that Tony had come onto his stomach. He held back a comment about how quick that had been, not wanting to make Tony feel bad, and sat up slightly onto his elbows while Tony buried his face into his neck, panting hard. 

“I’ve never done that before,” he explained after catching his breath. “I don’t--I’m not--I don’t think I’m ready for that,” he finally managed to say, and Loki nodded gently. 

“Understood.” Instead he slid his hands up either side of Tony’s chest, coming to hold him halfway up. “What  _ are _ you ready for?” Loki asked earnestly, waiting for Tony to respond before making another move. 

“Sit on the side of the bed and I’ll show you.” Tony climbed off of him and got onto the floor at the side of the bed, waiting expectantly until Loki did as asked. Tony scooted up so he was between Loki’s legs and ran his hands up his inner thighs. Nearly quivering in anticipation, Loki watched as Tony looked up at him through thick, dark eyelashes, and without breaking his gaze, took the tip of his cock into his mouth. 

Loki tilted his head back and closed his eyes, lips parted as he took in a deep gasp of air at the sensation of Tony’s mouth, hot and wet and tight, around his cock. He gripped the end of the bed as Tony’s tongue encircled him, realizing very quickly that Tony had particular talent with his mouth. 

Tony did the best he could to catch Loki’s gaze whenever Loki glanced down at him, taking his cock deeper with no hesitation and seemingly no difficulty. With his hands firmly on both of Loki’s thighs, he only used his mouth, bobbing his head up and down while Loki gazed down at him, marveling as he watched his cock disappear into Tony’s waiting mouth. 

“Oh. Tony,” he murmured as he watched Tony’s nose come flush with his belly, his cock entirely down his throat now. “By all the fucking real--” he tightened his fists on the edge off the bed, gasping when Tony pulled backwards and released his cock from his mouth. 

“Pull my hair,” he said firmly, and Loki glanced down at him in surprise, lips parted as he tried to think of some kind of retort, something witty to tease him before he did, but instead he put a hand on the back of Tony’s head, entangled his fingers with his short hair, and tugged hard, tilting his head upwards so he had to look at Loki. “Yeah. Like that.” And once again he took Loki’s cock into his mouth. 

Loki held him by the hair, keeping his head still as he thrusted his hips forward, feeling first the back of Tony’s throat, then the delicious sensation of sliding down it. Once, Tony coughed and pulled back a little, but groaned in contentment when Loki yanked him by the hair, pulling him back so he could continue to fuck his mouth. 

Loki thought, for a moment, that he wasn't going to last any longer than Tony had, as the sensation of Tony’s mouth drew intense heat from Loki’s belly, made it build and spiral, leaving Loki out of breath and clutching the blanket with the hand that wasn’t in Tony’s hair. His thighs shook a little as it drew closer. 

Abruptly, he said, “Tony, I’m goi--” And  tugged Tony’s head back to try to avoid coming into his mouth. It was nearly too late. When he managed to get Tony to release him he had already started to come, and it covered Tony’s lips and cheek as he pulled Tony backwards away from him and moaned his name. When he was able to look down again, it was to see Tony wiping cum off of his cheek and sliding his own fingers into his mouth. “Fuck!” he growled, and yanked Tony by the hair again. “Fucking get up here,” he demanded, and when Tony obeyed, getting onto his feet again, Loki pulled him into a deep kiss, tasting himself on his lips. 

“Fuck,” he murmured again and released Tony’s hair before falling hard onto the pillows, panting deeply as he stared at the ceiling. He felt Tony move next to him, half on top of him, legs around one thigh as he laid down with him. “Has anyone ever told you how fucking good you are at that?” 

“Oh yes,” Tony said and when Loki looked over at him, it was to see him grinning triumphantly. “Many times.” Tony’s lips were on Loki’s neck now, and this time  _ he _ bit down and Loki shuddered at the slight pain from his teeth. 

For a while they just laid together, panting, glancing only briefly at one another because even though Loki’s cock lay soft between his legs, every look into Tony’s dark eyes made desire once again bubble through his body. 

Loki realized, with a smirk, that there was a red mark growing on Tony’s neck where he’d bitten him, and leaning over he placed his lips over that mark again, sucking lightly on his skin. 

“Stop that,” Tony said, but his voice was toothless. “You’re going to give me a hickey.” 

“That’s the idea,” said Loki as he nipped at him one last time before placing his head down on the pillow again. 

After a few quiet moments where Loki found himself holding Tony close by the small of his back, running his thumb down the bumps of his spine in silence and contentment, Loki felt Tony pressing himself against his thigh, and glanced down to see that he was hard again. 

“That was quick,” he said this time, with some measure of surprise, and Tony let out a breathless laugh. 

“It’s a talent,” he said with a grin. 

Adjusting their position, Loki moved so that he could stroke Tony’s once-again hard cock in his hand, thumb brushing over the slit on the tip as Tony groaned, pressing his face into Loki’s neck. Without hesitation, Loki’s free hand was in Tony’s hair again, pulling hard. 

“Fuck yes,” Tony groaned. “Harder.” 

Throwing away any concerns about hurting him, Loki tangled his fingers as tightly as he could without actually pulling out any hair and Tony groaned happily into his neck as he thrusted into his hand. For a second time, he came on Loki’s stomach, collapsing onto him for a few minutes, his body jerking erratically for a moment as Tony pressed his forehead to Loki’s and said his name. When Tony became still, Loki gently pushed him off and got up to dig the handkerchief out of his pants pocket to clean himself up. 

At somewhat of a loss of what to do next, Loki sat on the edge of the bed facing the dresser, wondering if he should put his clothes back on and leave Tony to do the same. There was still a modicum of afterglow surrounding them, but Loki wondered if now, with the passion sated, Tony might want him to leave again. 

Then he felt Tony’s hand on his shoulder, pulling him gently back onto the bed, and Loki followed him, stretching out his long legs as Tony laid down beside him, slipping one hand into Loki’s. Loki swallowed. It was almost too intimate, even compared to what they had just done, to lay there peacefully holding his hand. 

After about a half hour, he realized Tony had fallen asleep, and carefully extracted his hand. But just as he did so, Tony rolled over to face him, still dead asleep, curling up next to his body. Loki felt a lump rise in his throat and he swallowed it hard before wrapping one arm around Tony’s back and pulling him as close as he could. 

* * *

Loki only realized that he had fallen asleep when he woke up to find that Tony was no longer there. Brunhilde, however, was contentedly laying on the pillow across from him, her big odd eyes open as she watched him sleep. 

“How did you get in here?” he asked, sitting up slightly and reaching over to run a thumb up her velvety nose and forehead, listening to her deep, rumbling purr. 

“J.A.R.V.I.S. keeps letting her in,” Tony replied from the doorway, where he was dressed again and holding a mug. Loki could smell coffee and glanced over to the alarm clock on bedside table to realize that it was very early in the morning. They had slept through the rest of the evening and a good portion of the night, and Loki, still wearing only his unbuttoned shirt, propped himself up on the pillows, blinking blearily. He watched as Tony took a good, hard look at his body, before walking into the room and offering him the mug of coffee. Loki stretched his legs and crossed them, pleased to have drawn Tony’s gaze so strongly and content to put on a little show for him. 

“I think she’d rather live here than in the dorm,” Tony said as Loki took the cup from him. 

“I don’t blame her.” Loki sat up fully, resting back against the headboard, comfortable in his semi-nudity as he took a sip of coffee. 

“She can stay, if she wants,” Tony said and sat on the bed next to Loki, who eyed him curiously. 

“You know,” Loki began, “it’s really because of Brunhilde that I made up our relationship. You see, when an Asgardian gets married, it’s tradition to give them a cat so they can have a loving pet in their household--it used to be because they would take care of mice but that’s not exactly an issue anymore--but the tradition holds.” His voice was somewhat hesitant and quiet. “And I couldn’t just tell my mother that Brunhilde was unnecessary. I adore her,” he said with a touch of vulnerability in his voice. 

Tony raised an eyebrow. “Sounds like your mom jumped the gun.” 

“You could say that,” he said, eyeing Tony who was simply sitting there, watching him drink his coffee. “She believed there was something between us,” he said carefully, catching Tony’s gaze. 

Tony nodded a little, saying nothing, then got up and left, coming back a few minutes later with a mug of his own and the coffee carafe so he could refill Loki’s. 

“She can stay,” he said again, this time a little more firmly. “It was nice having her around, even if I did have to keep buying new socks.” 

Loki swallowed hard, easily understanding the subtext. Sex had been easy. He thought that maybe if he gave Tony a good tug and a hard kiss they could do that again instead of staring at one another while Tony offered the kind of intimacy Loki was unprepared for. 

“It  _ is _ a better place for her than the dorm,” he said hesitantly. “Are you sure about this?” 

“I don’t think you understand exactly how much I missed having you here.” There was a softness in Tony’s face, along with something akin to the barest hint of puppy eyes.  

“I only lived here for two weeks.” Loki’s face softened tremendously and he was left feeling both nervous and excited at the prospect of being so close to Tony again. 

“It felt like a lot longer than that.” 

“I need to think about it,” Loki said from behind his coffee cup, though his mind had been made up from the moment Tony suggested it, as he thought about him blearily stumbling into the kitchen so they could eat breakfast together, of how they would study or play games or just sit together in companionable silence, and how Tony treated Brunhilde like a member of his family. 

As if summoned by the thought, Brunhilde trotted over from where she had been laying on the pillow and headbutted Tony’s thigh before falling onto her side next to him, treading the air. 

“She likes you,” Loki said as she nuzzled up against his thigh. 

“I can tell,” Tony said with a smile, then leaned in close, cupped Loki’s cheek in his hand, and kissed him. Loki slid his hand behind Tony’s neck to hold him fast, desire and the wonderful sensation of _being_ _wanted_   began to build within him, but instead of trying to coax him into bed for another round, he simply nuzzled against his cheek, eyes closed, sighing softly. 

“Do you have anything in the fridge for breakfast?” Loki asked after a few quiet moments had passed and his stomach broke the silence. “Or did you go back to kale smoothies again?” 

“Actually,” Tony said as he finished his coffee, “I went grocery shopping this morning before you got up. I thought I could maybe try and make you breakfast, but I really have no idea how to cook eggs,” he said, somewhat sheepishly. 

Placing the mug on the bedside table, Loki slid out of bed and picked up his jeans, now dry but crumpled after having laid wet on the floor for the entire night. He tugged himself into them just the same, and once again picking up his coffee, nodded to Tony to follow him. 

“Then I’d better show you,” he said, and headed towards the kitchen, smiling as he heard Tony fall into step behind him. Butterflies fluttered in his stomach at the thought that he could do this every morning again, if he wanted to, because he was welcome and wanted and Loki had desperately needed that for so long. 

Brunhilde trotted into the kitchen behind them, meowing urgently until Loki realized he didn’t have any food for her. But when he opened up the fridge he found a deboned fillet of salmon sitting on the shelf next to the eggs and bacon. 

“That was very thoughtful of you,” he said, a touch of tenderness in his voice as he glanced at Tony where he leaned against the counter sipping his coffee. 

“I didn’t want to leave her out,” was all he said, a little smile on his lips, and Loki nodded. 

Given how Brunhilde had brought them together, Loki figured that she might be not just the most beautiful kitten in the world, but also the most important. As Loki opened the salmon first, he looked down at her, smiling as she waited patiently. She was adorable, he loved her profoundly, and she was the best thing to have ever come out of a lie.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This fic is the product of a two year long labor of love, and I want to thank everyone for reading. A special mention goes out to my best friend, Cheesiestart, without whose daily encouragement, suggestions, and beta reading this fic would not have been possible. Another special mention goes to those who have left comments. Your encouragement and enthusiasm has warmed my heart and made me excited to check my email every time I posted a chapter. 
> 
> Thank you again for reading. I hope you've enjoyed it.


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